Learning about Yourself While Going on Blind-Dates Will Help You Develop Better Relationships

If you have been going on blind-dates for quite some time now and haven’t yet succeeded in extending a date into a meaningful relationship, you may want to take a careful look at yourself and understand the reasons.

OBSERVE YOURSELF WHILE GOING ON A BLIND-DATE

Looking at yourself doesn’t mean you stop going on blind dates. You still do, knowing that blind-dates offer you a great opportunity to learn a lot about yourself.

Observing yourself and your interactions can teach you a lot about the ways in which you present yourself, what self-image is important for you to project, and whether there are any fears and needs which “control” your being able to be relaxed and enjoy the date.

Such self-observation will enable you to realize whether there is anything you need to change in order to become able to succeed in extending a blind-date into a relationship.

While blind-dates can be enjoyable, surprising and interesting, going on many might begin to be boring. Even though you supposedly meet a new person on every blind-date you go (because otherwise it is not “blind-date” anymore), at times you might feel that you have already “met” this person and already had “this conversation” - only this time he/she has another face and another way of self-expression (or not…).

You’ve probably heard (or even used) the old "trick” to approach someone new at the beach or in a cafe: "You look familiar; haven't I met you before?", or "Haven't I seen you already, let me guess..."
Well, these are not only lines intended to strike a conversation with a stranger. These,at times, describe your feelings on a blind-date. The only difference is that on a blind date you don't actually say to the person "You look familiar..." or "Haven't I seen you before..." You KNOW you didn't. It is only that this blind-date is so similar to previous ones, that you wished you would have sent in a tape-recorder with previous conversations you’ve had with other dates and use your time more efficiently by staying home, go the movies, meet friends (or, for that matter, go on another blind-date at a near-by cafe...).
How to benefit from each and every blind-date you go on? How to not feel bored and disappointed? How to not feel you should have stayed home? How to not feel you’re wasting your time – once more?

TREAT EACH DATE AS A NEW LEARNING EXPERIENCE

Even though blind dates can be fun, interesting, and provide a great opportunity to meet someone new, you need to treat each and every one of your dates with respect, showing genuine interest in him/her. The conversation will then take a different turn from other conversations you might have had on previous blind-dates.
LEARN ABOUT YOURSLEF (TOO) WHILE GOING ON BLIND-DATES

In order to have an interesting, stimulating date, DON’T BE BLIND TO YOURSELF WHEN GOING ON A BLIND DATE! That means, in addition to genuinely wishing to get to know your date, you should take the opportunity to learn and find out things about YOURSELF which you haven't known before.

During a blind date you need to observe yourself and realize how you interact with the other person; get in touch with whatever expectations you might have; check whether you are authentic, to what degree you are open, whether you have a hidden agenda, whether there are any fears which drive your reactions and behaviors (such as fear of being ridiculed; not appreciated; rejected); any needs which motivate you to show your “best side” (such as the need to be accepted; to be loved and appreciated; to be asked out again, and so on).

The more you learn about yourself during a blind-date, the more able you become to develop a relationship, if, and when, any of the blind dates you go on will materialize into a serious, on-going bond.