Living with Loss Part 2

Loss is natural, even inevitable, as we discussed in Part 1 of this article. But why does loss have to be so hard? And what can we do to make it just a bit easier? How do we deal with grief? With loss? Even with grief about loss? Here are some suggestions:

* Accept your feelings, particularly of grief, and know that they will pass eventually, even if you want to wallow in them. It is a natural progression, so let it take place. You will be okay... not right away, but eventually. You can't spend the rest of your life wandering around your house hugging yourself and crying.

* Light a candle before you go to bed and spend fifteen minutes just feeling your feelings. Cry, shout, sob, or whatever you need to do. You can also incorporate some journal or poetry writing into this time. Regular time to grieve will help you move forward and keep you functioning the rest of the time. Sometimes, dealing with other people's sympathy is really difficult, and this will help you put on a brave face.

* Reach out for support. Join a prayer or meditation group or find a counselor. They may know more about loss than you do. Get a massage or Reiki healing treatment for relaxation. Realize that your grief will manifest itself physically and emotionally, so tend to both your body and spirit to ease the grief pain.

* Undertake exercise that you enjoy. The release of endorphins in your body will balance out the sadness and emptiness you feel and give you stamina through a difficult time. Plus you'll be doing something good for your body instead of turning to alcohol, sugar, or other addictions.

* Never underestimate the ability of your angels, spiritual guides and teachers, and Higher Power to support you! Sit down, get quiet, and ask for help from your spiritual support of the light. Place your hands palm up so you can feel their presence with you.

* If you lost a person, try to connect to them spiritually. If they loved to dance, dance in your living room. If they loved to sing, sing their favorite song. Honor them by cooking their favorite food or wearing their favorite color. We don't have to forget that person to release the pain of their loss.

* Go out and be in nature. Even just sitting in the middle of a field of grass puts you closer to the Divine. If you don't want anyone to see you cry, go outside at night and sit under the starry sky. Moon or no moon, you will feel the power of the Divine.

* Volunteer! Just like the fishermen down in the Gulf, volunteering may help get your mind off the tragedy, even if you are in the thick of it. Or if you don't want to be around people, volunteer at an animal rescue or shelter; you never know, you might bring home a furry comforter! Striving to make the world a better place will help you feel better.

* Resist patterns of negative thinking. Instead of asking, "Why did this happen to me?" or "How am I going to survive this?," ask yourself, "How can I fix this?" or "What is in my control/power to change here?"

* Remember that loss is Letting Ourselves Surrender Stagnancy. Change creates movement and movement creates new growth.

Know that movement is happening in your life and new people, jobs, opportunities, and blessings are on their way to you NOW! Let yourself be reborn like the Phoenix who rises from the dust of its own fiery ashes. Accept your loss, dust yourself off, do your grief work, and you will eventually move forward.