With the dawn of each new year comes the ritual of making resolutions. It should come as no surprise that the top three New Year goals focus on losing weight, better money management, and developing healthy habits. These resolutions often have their roots in frustration, fear, or emotional pain. We are tired of feeling out of control and we want better.
Yet often, in as little as a week, the decision to make the needed changes, and the will power to carry them out, begin to wane.
When it comes to resolutions, people generally fit into one of these five categories. Which one sounds like you?- I never stick with my goals so why bother.
- I make a big sweeping resolution, stick to it for a few days or so, and then go back to my old ways.
- I make a resolution, tell everybody about it, and either don’t start or quickly fizzle. I feel guilty and embarrassed when asked about it or see somebody who knows.
- I stick with my goal, achieve it, then go back to my old ways.
- I stick with it, achieve it, and continue to enjoy my new habit or success. There may be setbacks now and again, but I persist.
If you find yourself in of the first four categories, you are not alone.
In 2008, a Franklin Covey survey of over 15,OOO people revealed that by the end of January, a third of all resolution makers broke their resolutions. Less than 25 percent actually stuck with them long-term.
According to a 2002 journal of Clinical Psychology study, 25% of participants break their resolutions within one week and only 46% are still going for it within six months.
If you are ready to move into the resolution success group, implement these ten time-tested strategies to help you turn your resolution into a reality:1 - Choose a goal you really want. If you are making a resolution because you think you should, or someone else wants you to do it, you will probably lose interest and fail. Ask yourself, “What do you really want? What inspires me? Does it align with my most important values? Choose a goal that inspires you and has some emotional energy behind it.
2 - Know your ‘why’. Why is this resolution important to you? What are the benefits? Write a long list of all the reasons you want to turn this goal into a reality. What is the downside? Have at least twice as many whys as why nots.
3 - Be specific. What exactly do you want? How will you know you are successful? When is your deadline?
4 - Write your goal down. A Dominican university study of 149 adult participants representing a broad spectrum of ages and occupation showed a significant jump in success rates when goals were written down.
Writing helps you clarify what you want. It serves as a written contract or commitment with yourself. To make your goal statement even more powerful, factor in your most important benefits, including how you want to feel.
Notice how each statement feels in the following examples. Which ones inspire you to move forward?
- I am going to lose weight vs. I choose to weigh 140 pounds by June so that I feel confident about how I look and feel proud that I am taking great care of my body.
- I need to get out of debt vs. I pay off all my credit card debt by the end of the year so that I easily pay off my fixed monthly bills and feel more relaxed and confident about money.
5 - Do your research. Once you have a specific goal in mind, it is time to figure out how to turn your dream into reality. What resources do you need? Educate yourself about possible options and outcomes. Take time to figure out which activities will work best for you. Experiment with different options. Is a daily walk best for you, or three trips a week to the gym? Try them out for a week or two before making a commitment.
6 - Make a plan. What do you need to do regularly in order to reach your goal? What actions will give you the most leverage? Choose recurring activities that you will do at least 5 times a week to create new habits. If you are taking something away from yourself, make sure you replace it with something else that supports your goal.
Set milestones. When making resolutions and goals it is tempting to want to make big changes all at once. This is often a recipe for struggle and failure. Small shifts made consistently result in big gains long-term.
Ask yourself: What can I reasonably accomplish in a week? A month? What do I need to do to get there?
Since these goals are realized within a shorter time frame, instead of the far-off future, you will experience success more often and that success will motiviate you to keep going.
7 - Be flexible and persistent. Life happens. Expect setbacks. Learn from them and begin again and again until you reach your goal. If you derail for more than a few days, or find your plan isn’t working for you, reevaluate. What is working for you? What needs to be changed? What is making this difficult for you? Are you asking too much or too little of yourself? If you need to revise your goal, your timeline, or your plan, do so. . Once those habits are in place you can ‘amp it up’ and add in new ones.
8 - Get support. Most people benefit from the support and expertise of others, especially when stepping out of their comfort zones. A coach, trainer or other professional can help you build skills, provide needed information and help you gain perspective. She can help you plan and strategize. She will give you feedback, encouragement, and accountability. Having a support person or group can help you accelerate your progress and improve your chance of success dramatically.
Remember that Dominican University Study? Participant with written goals who sent weekly progress reports to accountability partners accomplished 76% of their goals as opposed to 60% who wrote their goal and 43% for the group that did not write anything.
9 - Don’t try to rely on will power. Powering through is helpful at first, but within a few days or weeks old habits will take over. This is a major reason why resolutions fizzle. Better to have a plan, strategies for success, and accountability to get you through when the going gets tough.
10 - Create a positive experience. Instead of treating your goal like ‘a drag’ and work, make it fun. Reward yourself when you hit your milestones. Partner up with someone playing for the same goal and support and challenge each other. Build in enjoyable activities whenever possible. If you enjoy making lists, write down your daily goal activities and check them off as you go. Your brain will look forward to these mini-rewards and reward you with a burst of feel good chemicals that will reinforce your behavior.
As you can see, this is a totally different approach to New Year’s resolutions than the usual, “I’m going on a diet starting tomorrow!” It does require planning and commitment. When followed it will put you in the top 25% of people that can say, “I did it!”
Reference: Dr Gail Matthews, Dominican University of Califo
ia, Goals Research Summary
http://www.dominican.edu/academics/ahss/psych/faculty/fulltime/gailmatthews/researchsummary2.pdf