Dear Prince Charming

Dear Prince Charming Or can I call you Charming? We've known each other so long, really from grade school. My mother plied me with fairy tales like I'm sure alcoholics ply themselves with drink. And I believed it. I believed that if I were good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, you'd come along and save me. I wouldn't have to worry for anything.

Except you didn't show up.

My friends found you. All around me swirled weddings, dinner parties with even-numbered guest lists, and planned pregnancies. But not for me. My friends pursued their dreams with the knowledge that they would have your financial and emotional support while I sat alone resenting that I had to go for the brass ring alone. How dare you leave me out here like this? I'd done everything right. I was a perfectly amiable person. Nice, even. Well, Honey, I'm tired of waiting. I'm gonna have to let you go.

I can't plan my moves around you anymore. I can't look at the left hands of men to see if they're wearing wedding rings. I can't consider the male population when deciding whether or not to move to a certain part of the country. I can't wonder whether or not you're going to be in line with my religious beliefs. I just can't do it anymore.

I have to find out what's best for me and who I am. Who I really am and not this mask who cares what people think of her. Now, don't try to make me feel guilty at this late date. After all, you've had your chance. If you happen to find me in a scuba class or in a bookstore, you'll have a harder time from now on because I plan to live. I plan to go after everything and I can't very well do that carrying along the yearning for you, which should be the yearning for myself.

You'll get over me pining for you. Please understand. It's not you, you're wonderful, it's me.

Take care of yourself. nnn