Self Care Fridays

I love giving myself permission to do what I want, don't you? Or do you? I know, it's hard, you have so much to do, and people depending on you and when you do have time to do what you want, it means sitting in front of the televison or computer (my vice) until it's time for bed. I hate to break this to you, but that is not self care, it's mindless and it allows you to tune out and zone out, but it doesn't address the needs of your soul.

What I'm talking about is giving yourself an opportunity, every day ideally, to pause and ask yourself what you really want and need in that moment. I know this is particularly challenging for women. Heck we were wired from an early age to take care of others. The husband, children, job, family all come first.

This challenge is even more pronounced for women of the generation before mine -- the women in their late 60's and 70's whose husbands are now retired and home all the time. They suddenly find themselves with no kids to care for, but instead a husband who is always there, wanting them to spend time with them. Where is the time for this poor woman who spent a lifetime caring for others and finds it so impossible to request what she needs - time alone? I know because I have coached just such women.

I'm going to give you a couple of my tips for creating space for yourself. The first step is to decide that you are going to take 5 minutes per day for you. Start small so you and your family members won't feel overwhelmed by this new habit. Spend some time allowing yourself to write down all the things you love or would love to do. Don't worry about how you would do them or think about the impossibility. This is about thinking about the things that bring you joy, the things that make you smile, make your heart sing. Write them all down and feel how happy that makes you. Keep your list in a special place.

Now, once a day take that time for you and little by little, add some time until you have possibly an entire hour or even day to yourself! Read a book, go on a walk, take a bath, go grocery shopping alone, go to a wonderful cafe by yourself and have a fabulous beverage. Notice what happens as you take this time for you. Notice what you feel. It probably feels a little decadent, a little selfish (it's not) a little wonderful, a little more grounded. Just notice and allow the good feelings to seep into your being. Notice how the rest of your life starts to feel.

You deserve this time, you need this time. You will be happier and thus a better version of yourself by taking this time. If this feels way too challenging, please contact me. I'd love to coach you through some ways of getting to a point of having that kind of luxury, because it really is a necessity.

To your own blessed self-care. Lovingly,

Coach Cindie