Spiritual Growth From Bereavement

Creating or strengthening our spirituality can have untold beneficial effects upon us after loss. By spirituality I do not mean religion. The two are very separate. Religion is based around organised belief by an outside body. Spirituality in contrast, is individual belief created by searching deep within one’s self.

There is no one true path in Spirituality. Each path is individual and belongs only to the person who is walking it. Yes, there may be similarities to other paths but the essence is unique. Every activity can be turned into a spiritual one. We can use more traditional practises like Meditation and Prayer or turn to more informal ones such as playing with our animals, listening to music, and even cooking amongst others.

Loss and Spirituality are intimately entwined. Loss forces an inner change upon you. The key aspect of spirituality is about creating positive inner change. Therefore loss can act as a catalyst for Spirituality. One of the biggest mysteries of Life is Death. We are brought up not to think about Death, to pretend that it does not exist. So when it arrives we are unprepared. Death is the creator of many questions that beg to be answered. Our Spirituality allows us to explore these questions, search within for answers that make sense to us. It lets us create meaning from our loss and start answering our questions about the meaning of our life.

At the same time, we not only experience questions about life, we are forced to question ourselves. We look at what is important to us and what is not. We are allowed to see the truth of our lives. Whether they are full of meaning or if we are living in an empty void, in truth not really living but not dying either.
Death offers us a choice. It gives us a chance to look at our existing values and evaluate their worth to us. We can either strengthen them or create new ones that mean more to us. These can then become a foundation upon which to build: a way to transform our lives, to live richly and deeply. We can create authentic lives based upon our own definitions of what it means to live. We can challenge every false belief we possess, tossing those values and beliefs that are outdated onto the funeral pyre alongside our loved one.

This is the essence of Spirituality: to create inner growth that we can then apply to our lives in the real world. It means that we have to step outside our comfort zones. We have to challenge ourselves. It can be scary yet also exhilarating. We live in the moment having the courage to be who we truly are. With Loss, we are already out of our comfort zones, we are already challenged. The fear is already there and so is the courage. It makes logical sense to use this moment to become Spiritual Beings. We are already at the door. We just need to walk through.