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Succeed With R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

Topic: Grief and LossBy Donna T. HaddadPublished Recently added

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During difficult economic times, there is a tendency to have doubts and conce
s about one’s future. Past disappointments and perceived failures can bring fears, doubts, and frustrations roaring to the surface to confuse and complicate our present situation.

The seeds of joy, success, love, and abundance are found in R.E.S.P.E.C.T., and we must not let our past interfere with our present and future goals.

Resilience is our ability to draw upon the strength and wisdom we have gained from our past experiences, and use these to move through and beyond our present circumstances. Resilience is our ability to learn from the challenges and difficulties in our lives and then build on what we have learned. If the boat you are cruising through life on, hits some rough waters there is no reason to lose hope or confidence in yourself or your future. It is not always easy to pick ourselves up and keep moving on down the road, but there are a few things we can do:

(1) Be honest with ourselves and acknowledge what has happened and then be aware and acknowledge what part, if any, we played in what has happened. We then must do what is necessary to find completion and be at peace with ourselves and what has happened.

(2) Do not resist or fight the circumstances we find ourselves in because this resistance can very easily morph into negativity, and the negativity can be expressed as simple irritation, or more intensely as anger, depression, severe anxiety, or resentment.

(3) Resist and ignore the temptation to place blame. Spending more than five seconds blaming other people or circumstances for our situation is a waste of time and valuable energy, and only serves to cloud our vision and misdirect our focus. It also increases our anger and frustration and makes us feel like a “victim”. Once we begin to feel like a victim, it’s hard to move out of that mentality.

(4) Focus your time and energy on moving forward with the deeply felt conviction and knowledge that your current situation has only temporarily moved you off your path, and
no-thing or no one can keep you from your goal.

Enthusiasm is essential to success, and it doesn’t have to be a cheering banner waving enthusiasm. Believe in your goal and move toward your goal with a deep passion for what you are doing. Most of us have experienced a situation or heard of a circumstance where someone had an idea that may not have been particularly innovative or exciting, but the person was so excited, passionate, and committed to the idea that h/she got others excited. The enthusiasm and passion od the person was so contagious that others joined in and helped the idea succeed. If you have an idea or goal you believe in, do not hesitate out of fear of what others may think or say; let others see your passion, enthusiasm, and commitment, and Go For It!

Self is the most important factor in achieving your goals and desires. The roots of your success, prosperity, and love, grow very deep within you and involve who and what you think you are as opposed to who and what you really are. It is not enough to simply have a more positive attitude
or strive to become more motivated. Here are some things to seriously ponder as you strive to change how you think of yourself:

1) You are the person with whom you have the most intimate relationship, so if you do not know, accept, trust, and love yourself, you will find your path to success and love filled with unnecessary roadblocks of your own construction.

2) If you are experiencing difficulties, remember that you are not your present circumstances. Your circumstances do not define who and what you are now, or will be in the future.

3) Your past disappointments and perceived failures do not define who you are now or will be in the future.

4) Do not expect perfection from yourself or anyone else. Although we know on an intellectual level that no one is perfect, we have come to expect perfection from ourselves because this attitude and expectation formed over a lifetime of hearing parents, teachers, coaches, and others tell us what they expected of us and from us. We bought in to what we heard and came to believe we should be the best and the brightest. Be only the best you want to be, and shine as bright as you want to shine for yourself. Bring more joy, love, and good into your life and the lives of others because you want to, not because someone else wants you to.

5) Your life is happening in this moment, not in past experiences or future maybes. Dwelling in the past can trick you into believing your future will repeat the past.

6) Be loving and compassionate with yourself, and love with wisdom. This simply means to nurture, support, comfort, and love yourself in equal proportion to the way and amount of nurturing, love, support, and comfort you give to others.

7) Do Not listen to the subconscious chatter recorded in the sound studio of your past. Record a new sound track over the chatter; and record it in the sound studio of your dreams and desires.

8) Your possibilities are limitless, but if you do not believe in yourself it will be very difficult for others to believe in you.

Purpose is the next important factor. Your purpose or intention is your desired outcome, and it must be clearly defined. The clearer you are the easier it will be to follow through to a successful outcome. In order to maintain motivation, it is important to have a strong personal incentive to accomplish the goal and achieve what you desire. When deciding on the purpose or intention behind your goal, consider the following two questions: (1) Does my goal improve my life and/or the lives of others? (2) Do I have a talent or gift to share with the world and no longer want to push it to the “back burner”?

What you believe to be your purpose at one point in your life may change; so give yourself the permission and space to grow and change. What is most important is to think and act in a purposeful manner regardless of what you are doing at any given time in your life.

Extraordinary is who and what you really are. You may have a job you consider ordinary; you may see your daily activities as ordinary; and you may think you look ordinary. However, the truth is that, in reality, you are extra ordinary. You are not your job, your looks, or your daily activities. You are, in fact, a special and unique creation with talents and abilities that you are meant to share and use to enjoy your life to the fullest and help others to thrive and enjoy their lives. Don’t just “hang in there”, or just try to survive or “get by”. Focus your thoughts on the extraordinary person you truly are because you will only go as far as your beliefs allow you to go. When you know and understand your inherent worth, and feel worthy to receive all that you desire it will begin to show up in all areas of your life. As Martha Graham once said, “You are unique, and if that is not fulfilled then something has been lost”.

Commitment is difficult for a procrastinator. It is hard to commit to achieving a desired goal when you keep putting off doing the things necessary to do in order to get where you want to go. I know because I did just that for a very long time until I realized that my past mistakes and disappointments had nothing to do with my present and future goals. Fear and doubt will drain your energy, wound your spirit, rip holes in your heart, and block your creativity and motivation. Commit to your goal, follow through with your plan, be consistent with your efforts, and persevere until you reach your goal.

Trust is very simply Faith in Yourself, Your Goals, and your God.

Article author

About the Author

Donna Haddad is a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist, Holistic Behavioral Therapist, Grief Recovery® Specialist, Author of two books and contributing author to another, and an Inspirational Speaker. She has spent the last 13 years working with clients and conducting seminars in Califo
ia and Oregon. Her first book, "Looking At The World Through A Fractured Lens-Subconscious Clutter And Grief Distort Our Vision" was written after the suicide of her brotherin 2006. The second book,"Yes,You Can Have Success,Love, and Abundance-You Can Do It With
R.E.S.P.E.C.T",is a little book of hope and encouragement.

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