Transitioning Through Change: Women and the Challenge of Global Living

As a woman who has gone through a number of transitions for two lifetimes, I have lived through the uncertainties, difficulties, tensions and risks associated with being uprooted from one's comfort zone. As a professional coach, I've found personal affirmation from other women whose own stories of survival have opened up possibilities of coping with the challenges of transitions. These shared experiences have inspired me to become profoundly interested in knowing some of the factors which can help us move through the inevitable changes in our lives.

In our journey through life, we face many different types of transition at different times. In the past, life transitions were not as big an issue as women made relatively few of them. However, as global living becomes more and more a daily reality, we are now making more transitions and they are happening with greater frequency than ever before. Moving from one culture, country, or town to the next, adjusting to a new job, climbing the career ladder, starting a new business, relocating back home, having a baby, or approaching menopause are all different types of transition. As different as they are they have lots in common when it comes down to finding the best strategies for coping with the challenges they bring. The biggest challenge transition holds for all of us is definitely change.

Change can provoke many emotions ranging from excitement or joy to anxiety, from helplessness to outright depression. These emotions can hinder or benefit the person in transition. Of course, we would love to own only those emotions which support us to sail through life with ease and joy. The good news is that this can be achieved to a great degree. Though it takes discipline, courage and dedication to learn and train oneself to call on supporting emotions, most of the time it can be done.

So how can life evolve with ease and joy in times of transition?

One of the first things I learned from the women who came to me for counselling is this: how much easier it is to train our mind to welcoming change as opposed to resisting it! Life continually unfolds unexpected blessings that there is always something new to experience, learn or develop.

My experience indicates that acknowledging unpleasant emotions, but not focusing on them moves us and gives a greater clarity of the situation. For me, as well as for the women who shared their stories with me, it has been important to honour our feelings, realizing that they are a normal response to a difficult situation. Allowing the expression of negative feelings in a safe way and finally letting them go will enable us to move on with our lives. This empowers us to see the positive aspects of a particular transition, which in turn can also influence other areas of our lives in a more positive way.

From this I learned that it is ourselves who are in charge of our emotions and make the decision, albeit subconsciously. So why don't we choose the ones which benefit us most? What good is there cultivating anger or frustration?

One of the most important lessons I have learned in my professional life is to make a conscious decision to look for solutions and opportunities rather than focusing on problems. Every time this happen, I'd feel ‘jazzed’ up, I could dance on the table! Wow!

Shifting our focus to the here and now turns out to be a big energy booster, believe me! After all this is a new phase of our life and we want to explore new ideas, or meet new people.

Moving inevitably forces us to detach from our past experiences, emotions, belongings, habits. Painful as this may be, letting go of the past that no longer serves us in our current circumstance will get us a long way and make room for new things to show up in our life. This is an exciting phase in our life to take our wishes and dreams seriously and we should do it now, not later! Later may never come to surprise us.
In the end it is us who have the power to change what we don’t like in our life. How much time have we already wasted while waiting for someone else to do it for us?

Finally, we should be honest with ourselves and let our inner selves shine. Our inner beauty will make us feel strong, more open, and receptive to support from others, who truly value us.

If we can learn to gracefully navigate the oftentimes choppy waters of transition, including becoming conscious of our basic outlook on life, making changes where needed, developing a support system, and using effective coping strategies, we may find ourselves coming through the transition to the other side, in a much better place than we were when we started. Hopefully, this will lead us to find our passion, our voice and our feet wherever we may find ourselves living in the world. For me, that’s a big part of what life is all about!