Understanding Men & Women: Reinventing How We Can BE With Each Other
Written by Geoff Laughton
Sadly, along all the political back and forth that is polarizing men and women and in many of the relationships I see, I fear humanity is getting thrown in the rubbish.
Relationships haven’t been about connecting and community. It’s been about men vs. women. It’s been about truth vs. lies. It’s been about integrity.
We forget that yes, we have these human bodies, and we identify ourselves as different genders. However, regardless of the body and gender identity, we are humans. And that’s what we need to remember and return to.
Here are my 3 key points around how we can better understand men, understand women, and change this current climate. This is my opinion, and these are my questions around BEING with each other.
Check out this video for a discussion. https://youtu.be/JzhtXc9npdkWhat if each man and woman took responsibility for what we are each bringing to a relationship, and what we’re not bringing, rather than trying to fix or blame another person?
A lot of this confusion and blame is conditioning, values or beliefs from youth, mixed with our experiences as adults. Most of the time, the foundation has been drilled into us before we were even 10!
It’s about changing our definition of responsibility. Instead, what if it is defined as our response ability? This comes from one of my favourite spiritual leaders. Reactivity is enslavement, response ability is freedom.
Only when you realize that you are responsible do you have the freedom to create yourself not as a reaction, but to act from response.
Men can and must learn to bring our hearts. We have them, they’re deep, they’re wounded, therefore most men become conditioned to keep that part hidden.
What if we find our path to bringing our hearts more to life and to our interactions with everyone, not just our loved ones?
Women need to be more empowered and honoured to have their boundaries, to be able to say “no” and to have that heeded.
To understand women or understand men, both of these things need to come from within and outside, and we need to work together to strengthen them.
There has always been a lot of talk around patriarchy and matriarchy. At the end of the day, men and women have issues. Men and women lie. Instead of this division, we need to be focusing on humanity.
What if instead of trying to establish a hierarchy, we experimented with moving to a unified, energetic and cognitive field?
Focusing on the fact that we’re all in this together and we need each other. If we combined masculine and feminine energies, imagine the possibilities!
Couples need to listen to each other more.
This in an inquiry, and I’m going to be talking about and writing about this a lot going forward. I really want to know what you think about this! Please share your feedback and stories in the comments below.
Article author
About the Author
To-date, Geoff has worked with hundreds of private clients and couples; has led over 300 workshops; facilitated numerous life-altering retreats around the country for men, women and couples; and has spoken at numerous live and online events. Geoff is also delighted to debut his first book, Built To Last: Designing & Maintaining A Passionate, Loving and Lasting Relationship. https://yourrelationshiparchitect.com
Further reading
Further Reading
Article
A Look at Avoidant Attachment Styles and How They Work
The early development of avoidant attachment creates a coping mechanism that forms in childhood. Disconnected parent-child interactions typically trigger this condition. People who develop this attachment style learn to depend on their resources. They avoid deep emotional connections. People with this attachment style want intimacy, yet they remain afraid of becoming dependent on others. Understanding Avoidant Attachment Among the four primary attachment styles, avoidant atta
February 6, 2025
Article
Do You Really Understand The Swinger Life-Style?
So, you want to Play swinging? Do you like the idea of having sex with several attractive people, with no strings attached? Want the chance to explore your fantasies with like-minded people? Love having the intimacy and long-term commitment of your partner, but don't want to miss out on the opportunity for sexual exploration and variety? If this sounds like something you'd like to try, the increasingly popular lifestyle known as 'swinging' could be for you. What's so shocking
August 29, 2024
Article
The Advantages of a Web-Based Swinger Dating Service
Web-based swapping dating services can help you find a long-term swap relationship in the comfort of your home. These types of services can provide singles with information about like-minded people and help them get in touch with other couples. To use dating expertise, you need to register together. When registering to use the service, you need to provide more information as well as your contact information and interests. Maintaining your information conveniently will help yo
August 29, 2024
Article
Dr. Venus Nicolino: You Have To Make Yourself Available To Find Good Relationships
The idea of making yourself more desirable by making yourself less available doesn't make a lot of sense when you think about it. After all, Juliet would have plunged a premature dagger into the heart of her romance with Romeo if she hid in her room rather than go out on her balcony. The end of Sleepless in Seattle shifts from "awww" to "aw, no" if one of the two main characters skips the trip to the Empire State Building. As these examples from fiction show, making yourself
August 16, 2024