Want Real World Change? Stop Complaining

If you really want to change your life and help build a better world for yourself and others, you might want to consider this little piece of advice: stop complaining.

You don’t have to travel far these days to come across this crippling habit — there’s plenty of people fussing about the government, banks, large corporations and how they’re bilking us out of every dollar we have.

You’ll hear these conversations almost daily and the theme is usually the same: They ‘done me wrong’ and they need to fix it.

It’s true that the short-term payoff for this type of conversation is rich. We get some attention, feel engaged, connected and, at times, even powerful. We also get to enjoy that delicious feeling of being right.

Just like eating fast food everyday, the long-term cost of participating in such conversations eventually outweighs the perceived short-term benefits. We unconsciously create a feeling of despair and hopelessness.

We also stay trapped in the illusion that by talking about the problem we’re somehow contributing to fixing it. The reality is we’re just reinforcing it.

“The law of floatation was not discovered by contemplating the sinking of things, but by contemplating the floating of things…” Thomas Troward

If we truly want change, we must turn our attention away from the problem and direct it toward the solution. This can be a difficult task, though, if we continue to feel victimized and harbour feelings of resentment and anger.

Our first step, while a challenging one, is to acknowledge that we have in some way contributed to the results we complain about.

Yes, it’s true, they sold us a bill of goods and we should be angry. But we bought it, not once, but many times. Maybe it’s time for us to consider that we might just be as angry with ourselves as we are with them.

This will most likely feel uncomfortable, disheartening and a little scary at first.

But if the bad news is that we helped create this mess, what could the good news be about this perspective?

We have the power to uncreate this mess or even better, create something entirely new. Our feelings of hopelessness and despair will turn into feelings of empowerment and strength. We are no longer helpless victims of the system.

We saw this the last few weeks as the courageous people of Egypt, having had enough, stood together and toppled an oppresive regime.

Imagine what would happen if we collectively decided to participate in that type of change. What could we accomplish?

We might begin by understanding that we live in a consumer economy and, as such, we are the force that drives it.

We might entertain that if we all choose not to purchase products from any one manufacturer, buy gas at any one station or make deposits at any one bank, then that institution would likely be motivated to change. We decide, not them.

It’s time to realize that our votes do count and that our politicians will be accountable to a group of like-minded citizens who are willing to speak up and participate in the process of government.

In order to create that kind of positive change, we must first be willing to be accountable to ourselves and each other. Only then can we proactively change the conditions we used to complain about.