Browse Self Knowledge

Rev. Susan A. Haberko July 23, 2012 Have you ever found yourself in what seemed like a battle of wills with your child? Are you stumped as to why their behavior is so different from what you expect and want?

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I was having morning tea with friends and family on the weekend, and it was such a delight to catch up and be reminded of the love we share. As we sipped coffee in the sunshine at Nobby’s Beach Sinking into the compassion of extending love while basking in the warmth of communion, the depth of my gratitude for these people and that they would hold me in esteem as a matriarch of the group, moved me to what felt like an explosion of my heart.

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I was just this morning reading an article by Wendy Squires on the “Mamamia” FB page, where she addressed her need for what I call downtime. This quote is useful & I don’t know who wrote it but it sounds like a practicing psychologist

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Have you ever had the thought? My life just doesn’t seem to make sense! Is it possible for life to make perfect sense? I both believe and know it is possible for each of us to have our lives make perfect sense. It's possible to come into a deep connected alignment with our daily life and consciousness so that every moment is a walk in ease and grace, and that you know without any doubt that you are in the right place at the right time, the synchronicities all line up and are no longer a surprise.

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Mindfulness “LOVE AFTER LOVE The time will come when, with elation, you will greet yourself arriving at your own door, in your own mirror, and each will smile at the other’s welcome, and say, sit here. Eat. You will love again the stranger who was yourself. Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart to itself, to the stranger who has loved you all your life, whom you ignored for another, who knows you by heart. Take down the love letters from the bookshelf, the photographs, the desperate notes, peel your own image from the mirror. Sit. Feast on your life.” -Derek Walcottr

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Getting old isn’t easy for many of us. Neither is living, for that matter and neither is dying. We struggle against the inevitable and we all suffer because of it. It seems we have to find another way to look at the whole process of being born, growing old, changing, and dying, some kind of perspective that might allow us to deal with what we perceive as big obstacles without having to be dragged through the dramas of life.

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Recently I have had the privilege of being invited into an Aged Care Retreat to do an interfaith gathering, talk and play some beautiful meditation music.r

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Why Meditiate? Keeping on with daily practises for spiritual enlighmentment, knowing what your tue purpose is, and using that deep sense of agape love to guide your daily activity. "Better than power over all the earth, better than going to heaven, and better than dominion over the worlds is the joy of the man who enters the river of life that leads to Non-Being." –The Dhammapada (~300 B.C.) Meditation is the great remover of fear, the breaker down of belief systems that don't serve your higher mind. The liberator from misery and suffering.

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The fear of aging is inbuilt in most people, due to our materialistic philosophy. Which is not our desires and ownership of things per se, but our idea that reality is limited to what we perceive through the five senses. This then divorces us from a spiritual experience, leaving the understanding that “if it is shown us then we will believe”. This belief has a profound effect on how you might view the cycles of our life from birth through maturity, aging and onto death. Viewing life through a lens of sight taste smell hearing and touch, death would be the end of the road.

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I am getting older. Of course this is true for everyone, but it arrived for me so suddenly and I was a little unsure of how to be the best host to this arrival. I realized I am entering my Elder years and am now embracing the changes. My own parents gone and my children young men and women with their own lives and though I am loved and involved with them I feel my purpose and my position in life’s broader context to be shifting. I love the grandmother in me responding to the new babies that have arrived.

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Recently I made a trip to the supermarket, and was delighted to be able to help an elderly couple with some of shopping’s little snags such as pulling the trolley out and reaching for higher goods. They reminded me of my parents, and I so wanted to go home with them. As we chatted, the woman said to me” “Don’t get to be 85, it isn’t fun, I am not sure I signed on for this”?r

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Tip 1. How it is everything keeps changing? One moment you’re happily ensconced in a job with family around you and the next you’re in a land of new, where what you do is up to you. It should seem wonderful and liberating to now be retired; how come it is so new that you feel at times like you’re in a foreign land and don’t know the rules! It is like all stages of life we go into, there are different requirements made of us. When we retire or go into what is known as the third ager

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“Elder: a senior member of a tribe who has influence or authority” Aging can be a conscious journey into your own lived and experienced Wisdom. This involves developing the inner resources to adapt to ageing instead of denying it; it is taking a step to ensure that the next phase of life is filled with self-discovery and deliberate choices.

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"We are not victims of aging, sickness and death. These are part of scenery, not the seer, who is immune to any form of change.This seer is the spirit, the expression of ete al being."rn~ Deepak Choprar

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When dream memories are far between and few, what’s an aspiring dream catcher to do? Dreams are incredible experiences that everyone benefits from. Whether remembered or not, they're doing amazing work in your life and are critical to how well you learn, grow and thrive.

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Take a cue from history & create the ultimate sleep retreat. Sleep and dreams were the foundation for healing thousands of years ago. In ancient Egypt and Greece, if you were feeling out of sorts or sick, you'd head over to the nearest dream temple. These sleep sanctuaries were the hospitals of the time. Except in those days the focus was on dreams. The Egyptian sleep temples were dedicated to Imhotep, a priest who was also the first physician in recorded history. And the dream temples in Greece were called Asclepieia, named for the Greek god of medicine, Asclepios.

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Things Could Be Looking Up With The Help of a Dream. Handing a problem over to your dreams is referred to as 'dream incubation,' and it's one of the oldest and easiest ways to put your dreams to work in your life. It's incredible how many ideas and breakthroughs have been inspired by dreams. Some of history's biggies include the theory of relativity, the molecular structure of benzene, the periodic table, and the sewing machine. And when it comes to art, the list is immense. Countless paintings, movies and songs came to be via a dream.

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Confession… I love to lucid. I love many things about dreams, and — yes — among my favorites is the ability to get lucid. I started to explore lucid dreams in 2014, after stumbling upon a book titled ‘Lucid Dreaming: Gateway to the Inner Self,’ by Robert Waggoner. The author’s lucid dreams were so profound and amazing. I found myself wanting to experience what it’s like to consciously awaken in my dreams.

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The next time you find yourself lying in bed, tossing and turning, unable to shut off your your mind so you can fall asleep, give this simple trick a try: Relax your tongue. It’s not something we give a whole lot of thought to — our tongue. But, when you stop to consider its importance in your life, you’ll be quickly amazed. That’s one heck of an intelligent and active muscle you’ve got hanging out in your mouth. Inherently linked with the brain, your tongue can be the key to falling asleep at night.

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10 Habits for a Healthy Relationship A relationship is a partnership capable of enhancing every aspect of your life, emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually and sexually. Each couple is different and there are no hard and fast rules to a healthy relationship. The key is for both partners to invest time and effort in keeping the relationship strong, vibrant and moving forward. A healthy relationship needs to be active, dynamic and engaging; apathy, lethargy and stagnation are the kiss of death. Here are 10 habits you can adopt into your relationship to keep it healthy and strong.

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“The greatest pain is not being loved for who you are in your naturalness.”

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5 Ways to Jump-Start Positive Thinking You become what you believe, it really is that simple. What you believe is what exists for you but before the belief comes a thought. Your thoughts will direct your actions and determine paths of your journey. It takes time to train your brain to filter and discard the negative and choose and accept the positive. Trust me, I’ve been practicing positive thinking for years and it’s still work in progress.

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What is my passion and life's purpose? I have thought long on that question as I plowed through basic schooling, deliberated over college courses, experienced angst in choosing a major, and eventually my graduate degree. And that was just the beginning. How was I to discover my reason for being, or predict what l would enjoy doing the rest of my life... or even for part of it?

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About 18 months ago I started a journey to cleanse my body and mind. I was drinking way too often which then led to unhealthy eating habits, I was way too stressed, not sleeping properly, my mind was cluttered, I was too consumed with work and how to make money. I had no idea where I was going, worst of all I had no idea who I was. Never in a million years have I suspected that the simple cleansing will actually take me on a journey to re-evaluate my whole life and send me on a path to find my lost self.

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Know thyself. These words were inscribed in the vestibule of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi. For centuries, petitioners seeking advice from the oracle at Delphi would view the inscription. Philosophers throughout the ages offered this same advice to their students. These words are as valuable today as they were almost three thousand years earlier. Part of knowing yourself is understanding your beliefs. The difficulty is that most beliefs are subconscious. They have been accepted without ever having been critically examined.

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Last week, I received an email from a reader stating, "I have evolved past the spiritual understanding of author." I chuckled at the reader's bluntness. He didn't mince words; clearly, he felt that he had developed capabilities that were not only greater than those of "author" but beyond the "understanding of author."

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Last week, a reader wrote to say, "Why would I want to waste time wondering if I lived as an Incan, or as anyone else? I have enough to do in this lifetime." While the tone of my "Incan comment" was meant to be light-hearted, the reader had a point. The purpose of looking at past lives is not meant to distract you from your responsibilities in your current life. Nor is it to provide you with another area of study that must be mastered in order to "graduate."

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The scene in Paris where a black man was prevented from boarding a train on the Paris Metro by a number of Chelsea football supporters was proof that despite being 2015, very little has changed. A bystander at Richelieu-Drouot station recorded the event on his mobile phone, capturing the moment the rowdy supporters pushed the man named as Souleymane S., 33 years old, away as he tried to step off the platform and onto the train. They chanted, “we’re racist, we’re racist, and that’s the way we like it”. Overwhelmed and humiliated he gave up and walked away.

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Followers of Christianity have been falling away over the past century right across the world, with many societies becoming more and more secular. For many, religion simply has not been able to satisfy their conce s and answer those fundamental questions: Why are we here? If there is a God, why do so many appalling events continue to occur? As these questions go unanswered this can leave us feeling more empty and disillusioned. Perhaps we have reached a point collective conscience that many people now just require more, and are unwilling to accept religion on pure faith alone.

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With the first gay marriage to take place last year, I did struggle to understand the widespread opposition to this historic event.

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Anne Leitrim’s mummified remains were recently found at her home in Bou emouth, Dorset. The 58 year old former neonatal nurse had been laid beside her bed for 7 years. Neighbours said they believed she had moved away, this despite her windows being left open. She was only found after bailiffs had arrived at her property to recover mortgage payments that were in arrears. They had to wade through a mountain of mail, waist-high to get in.

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Childlessness, or the inability to conceive, is an often unappreciated source of pain amongst much of the general public. A study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) found the number of women aged 15-44 with impaired fecund city (impaired ability to get pregnant or carry a baby to term) was 6.7 million in America, which equates to 10.9% of the population. This natural function, one of the greatest of gifts that life has to offer, remains an unattainable dream for some women, who through no fault of their own find themselves fighting this lonely battle.

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It was Charles Darwin that said, "Animals, whom we have made our slaves, we do not like to consider our equals".

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First of all, people need to understand the concept of spiritual maturity in the right manner. According to the definition of spiritual maturity, it can be explained as the phenomenon in which all human beings are developed naturally in order to live prosperous and have healthy lives. In a broader context, it can be assumed that spiritual maturity has lot to do with other factors such as environment and family background because these two factors also influence the extent of spiritual maturity a great deal.

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It was Albert Einstein who once had this to say about education, “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” The education system remains an exercise in micro-management that provokes memories of the music video to Pink Floyd’s ‘Another Brick in the Wall‘, of school children being fed through a meat mincer by their overbearing headmaster.

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Most people want to change at least one aspect of their lives, but they don’t know how to get started. Making a goal is hard enough, but sticking to it can be even more difficult. Many people want to become better versions of themselves, which often implies that they should make their own paths instead of following the footsteps of others. Learning how to become a leader or a better leader, can be a difficult task to undertake. However, becoming a better leader is just like improving any other skill if you look closer.

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The near-death experience (NDE) remains a phenomena that continues to be an object of fascination for many. There are now thousands of documented cases with similar salient features as their central theme, that of travelling through a tunnel of bright light, being reunited with loved ones, spirit guides and other entities, and an all-encompassing feeling of love.

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You should never be happy all the time. And this is perfectly fine. You might be surprised after reading it because everything that you have been longing for your entire life is to be happy. And you sincerely want it to be a full-time thing. But the truth is that happiness can be harmful when it comes to enjoying your life to the fullest for many reasons. You might haven’t thought about it yet, but you will see how it happens and why it can damage your emotional balance. The pressure for happiness makes us very unhappy

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The sex industry is an often misunderstood profession that in all actuality can be a lucrative, convenient and viable career option for those brave enough (or fool-hardy depending on your point of view) to pursue this line of work. We have all heard of the time-wo cliché that prostitution is oldest trade, however, by and large the stigma and judgement still persists for all those who work within it.

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There have been many adjectives used to describe the region we call the Middle East. One such description given by David Keyes, the executive director of Advancing Human Rights, a non-profit organization promoting human rights around the world, was the ‘Kingdom of hate’. Harsh perhaps, but be in no doubt, the Arab world remains a benighted place at this time where the harshest of punishments are feted out to its citizens for often minor transgressions, and where women’s freedoms are closely monitored and even revoked by their rulers.

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Paul Hellyer was the former Minister of National Defence for Canada who sensationally announced that world governments were deliberately covering up ‘secret files’ that reveal aliens have been visiting Earth for thousands of years, and are already integrated into society. These aliens he claims would be unrecognisable as extraterrestrial if you happened to pass one in the street. Hellyer was the first high-ranking official to go public with his beliefs in his historic speech at the Toronto Exopolitics Conference in 2005.

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The late Terence McKenna, the American ethnobotanist and mystic, once exclaimed, “We have to create culture, don't watch TV, don't read magazines, don't even listen to NPR. Create your own roadshow. The nexus of space and time where you are now is the most immediate sector of your universe, and if you're worrying about Michael Jackson or Bill Clinton or somebody else, then you are dis-empowered, you're giving it all away to icons, icons which are maintained by an electronic media so that you want to dress like X or have lips like Y. This is shit-brained, this kind of thinking.

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Crop circles have been appearing in fields across the world as far back as 1667, “Strange News Out of Hertfordshire” ran the headline of the earliest find, now known as ‘The Mowing Devil’. The crop circle phenomena has been increasing exponentially since the 1970’s and the response from the general media and governments has been to launch a campaign to dispel any truth to the suggestion that some of these may in fact be genuine.

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There have been many tyrannical rulers throughout history. Joseph Stalin, leader of the Soviet Union, had killed many people during the Great Terror, coolly dispatching with his political opponents and other Russians, and also as a consequence of his economic policies, caused the famine in the Ukraine which claimed many more lives. Approximately 23 million died during his tenure. Indeed, to this day many Russians remain divided on their opinions of whether Stalin was a hero or a villain.

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It takes courage to deviate from the most accepted world-view. Anything that appears to fly in the face of our mundane daily reality is usually dismissed as a hoax or fantasy in our majority rule society. Many people will simply not consider other possibilities, seemingly outlandish at first, yet will tend to believe unquestionably information derived from news bulletins, heavily laden with propaganda and untruths that suit the underlying agenda.

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With the 1973 film release of Enter the Dragon, film-goers were treated to an experience that created a seismic shift in the world of cinema that spawned a craze for all things Kung Fu, and a new film hero named Bruce Lee was born. A relative unknown in western cinema, Lee was already enjoying celebrity status in Hong Kong and the Far East with iconic films such as The Big Boss and Fist of Fury.

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The ongoing Syria crisis, described as the ‘greatest humanitarian disaster since WWII’ continues to shock and appal in equal measure, and it’s not hard to see why. As the world wakes up to the realisation that these refugees are not freeloaders after all, but are literally fighting for their very existence, and are willing to risk life and limb to be allowed settlement in Europe. Since the Arab spring in 2011, the Assad regime has struggled to maintain control with the rise of the various rebel groups such as the Free Syrian Army and ISIS among them.

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23-year-old Poppy Smart of Worcester UK, grew so tired of being the recipient of wolf-whistling builders as she made her way to work each day that she saw no option but to report this to the police. Describing their behaviour as disrespectful and sexist she simply refused to tolerate it any longer.

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Sepp Blatter, who was once reluctant to incorporate goal line technology into football despite already being an established and successful addition to other sports including rugby and tennis, was quoted as saying, “Other sports regularly change the laws of the game to react to the new technology…we don’t do it and this makes the fascination and popularity of football”, appearing to suggest that the drama and chaos this created was somehow good for the game. Which is ironic really because drama and chaos is where he finds himself right now.

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The Tennis clay court season is almost upon us, so a good time perhaps to revisit one peccadillo and often debated issue, that of prize money, specifically the correct amount that should be awarded to both men and women within the higher echelons of the game. With equal prize money in Grand Slam tou aments awarded to both genders, despite the clear disparities between them, it is starting to become an elephant in the room, with men the biggest losers in this arrangement, and who may have due cause to feel slightly aggrieved.

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Are we alone in the universe? This is a question that has always remained a source of unending intrigue, which is understandable when you consider the enormous distances across the far reaches of space and time, of which we are but a fraction.

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The 1960’s was a decade that heralded a new wave of film stars such as Paul Newman, Sydney Poitier, Audrey Hepburn, Clint Eastwood and many others. But for a twist of fate, one actor may well have ranked amongst such prestigious talents had he not made the decision to forgo his acting career whilst on the verge of international stardom. Rising star Christopher Jones was tipped to be a worthy successor to James Dean with a body of work in TV and film including David Lean’s Ryan’s Daughter (1970).

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An interview on LBC radio in London with the Green Party leader Natalie Bennett raised many eyebrows for all the wrong reasons. Nick Ferrari, the radio interviewer, questioned Ms Bennett on the issue of housing, and the Green Party’s proposal to build 500,000 new social rent homes funded by mortgage relief from private landlords.

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It's a well established fact that getting and staying fit is best for you. While we live in this body we may as well live in it feeling good and looking good. Not many people will argue with that. There is, however, one problem. Getting fit is not the most exciting thing in the world and so it takes motivation to get fit and even more motivation to stay fit.

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Often when people think about the subconscious mind, images of a mysterious subterranean landscape shrouded in an inky, impenetrable darkness seems to pop up. In that darkness lurks all darkest secrets and desires. It also contains a great spiritual light and wisdom we are all trying to tap into.

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Denial is not just a river in Egypt

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Once upon a time, in Japan, a wealthy man was sitting having some tea. As he was taking in the beautiful sights and sounds of the beautiful landscape he inadvertently dropped his teacup and it broke. The teacup was made of clay and so it would need to be taken to a craftsmen in order to get it fixed. He sent his precious teacup to the shop. Later, when he received the teacup back it was mended, but it was mended crudely and it turned his precious beautiful teacup into a something he no longer appreciated.

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Self sabotage is by far the number one activity that derails our lives. Sure, other people and events can come around that will derail us, but more often than not, we are our worst enemy. Often self sabotage appears subtle, it infects our thoughts so seamlessly that we do not even realize we are self sabotaging. Its very sinister. However, with some reflection we can come to realize the patterns. Here are a few of the patterns that I realized not only in my own life but in the lives of the people I have rnencountered. See if you can see yourself in some of these.

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Life is a series of connections. Routes that take you from where you are—to where you want to be. Just as a physical bridge gets you safely over inconveniences on your jou ey—like a ditch or body of water—the mental and emotional bridges that move you beyond potential pitfalls on your path is self-awareness. These inner bridges are not built with concrete or steel, but rather with insights, personal virtues, and soul inspirations—qualities derived through self-awareness.

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Currently, we are faced with a crisis in consciousness, both individually and collectively on a global scale. It is an auspicious moment in which we have each received a personal invitation that calls us to a higher order; a time in which our higher qualities can be further developed for the purpose of greater service. The key to this conscious growth is a better understanding of our core nature that comes through greater self-awareness.

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In my 25 years experience as a psychologist and life coach, I have discovered three empowering principals that are key to lasting and enduring happiness regardless of your current challenges, life experiences, or ongoing circumstances.

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The rune that comes to raise awareness and consciousness today is called Thorn and it actually looks like a thorn. Personally, this rune has recently begun to resonate strongly with the idea of “essential defense system”, meaning that the rose has thorns as part of its essence, to protect its purity, delicacy and beauty from clumsy or reckless beings, but which leave room for the rose to shine at its full radiance and share her aroma with those who appreciate it.

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This rune is called Eh and came out in inverted position (it looks like an "M" upside down). It invites to start a journey towards our essence step by step. Shall we start? The concept of Consciousness that most strongly resonates with me now is “that which accepts all and judges nothing.” If each one of us is an embodied hologram of that Consciousness, this rune invites us to explore how to experience that concept in human form.

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Almost three years ago I decided it was time to know what was TRUE for me, who I really was, regardless of what was true for the world and the people around me and regardless of what the world and the people around me were telling me should be true for me. It was much stronger than a decision, it was pure determination, it became the most important thing in the world.

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This afternoon, when I went to pick up my daughter from school, I was mesmerized by a mom breastfeeding her baby. The image brought back the bliss I felt during the fifteen months I gave my precious one the tit. The moment fleeted at the sound and the hustle of excited children getting out of school.

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Everything seems to be still, and yet I feel the turmoil. The changes are not yet visible to the outside world, but my heart gladly receives the new dose of self-love and compassion. In the process, there's a race to conquer trust, some doubts rise to the surface to be released. There's also certain need to justify my apparent stillness, which runs together with the feeling that there's nothing to explain. Everything I've remembered so far helps, adds up... And it also confuses, contradicts. Inside, duality and unity coexist; it's a dark space, but safe and warm.

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About a month ago, I borrowed a puzzle from a friend. Putting it together turned it into a “puz-soul”. The lessons were many and they are still happening in spite of the fact that it is already back in the box. Since the analogies continue to help me daily, I’ve decided to share them with you. The value of one piecernr

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I’m in the incessant search of ways to expand my levels of consciousness. I’ve learnt that the tip of the iceberg is in asking questions without waiting for a logical answer, simply trust that the energy of the answer will arrive at the proper time and in the most suitable way. This technique has me making questions all day through. In the process, I've received the information that consciousness “includes everything and judges nothing.” Easy to recite and repeat, but how do I get rid of all the judgment? What distinguishes judgment from choice? What distinguishes judgment from awareness?

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Yesterday I hit bottom once again. What’s curious is that each bottom is deeper and darker than the previous one. It seems that all my lightwork is invisible, worthless and useless for this world. The feeling of separation that overflows me is the most overwhelming so far…

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My daughter, Annika, is learning to read. Every billboard, every label is an occasion for her to test her new skills as they develop. The sparkle in her green eyes at the joy of this whole world opening up in front of her makes possible what seemed impossible: my love for her keeps growing, expanding. I am overwhelmed with gratitude for this amazing opportunity of witnessing this marvelous process.

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I think I might be on to something. I am well aware that my main struggle in this life is conquering my self-worth. When I first came face to face with that fact, the first tip of advice I read was to create powerful affirmations to revert the pattern. Whenever I caught myself with an emotion that reflected my low self-esteem, I would fight back forcefully with a solid affirmation in the hope that the discomfort would go away. I wonder if you've ever walked that path.

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For years now I have been reading and hearing that whenever you choose something for you, you have to imagine or feel that it is already there, that you already have it; that seems to be the *key* to creating the reality of your dreams. I will confess right here that I’ve tried that countless times, with very little success. However, it seems that lately, with my new-found trust that –as Panache Desai puts it- “Life is not happening to you, it’s happening for you”, there’s some awareness of an inner knowing that my dreams are already in the making somehow.

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