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ARTArticleMy Husband / Wife Won’t Go To Marriage Counselling… What Do I Do?“Nicola, My husband won’t go to marriage counselling, I’m desperately unhappy what shall I do?” “My wife refuses to speak to anyone, she says we are beyond help, it’s too late. Shall I give up?” These are statements I hear time and time again, and to be honest I don’t blame a husband or wife if they don’t believe in traditional relationship counselling. Statistics report that 75% of people who see marriage counsellors are worse off or divorced after! An alarming statistic isn’t it.ARTArticlePorn Addiction, What To Do If It Is Affecting You and Your RelationshipThis is a topic no-one talks or writes about yet it is really common and the number is rising. Why? Well for one is has become accessible to almost everyone. If you think about it nearly everyone has a mobile phone and most people have a lap top or tablet on top. Statistics show our addiction to check our phone and fill any time gaps by searching online is increasing. For these reasons sadly addiction to pornography is rising. So in this article, I want to address What is porn addiction? What are the signs of porn addiction? How can porn addiction affect a relationship ARTArticleRelationship Advice - How to Keep Marital Satisfaction High After ChildrenThe effects of having a child are immeasurable. Whilst most parents say the greatest moment and thing in their life was the birth of their son or daughter. The effect that having a child can have on your marriage is immense. Marital dissatisfaction can ensue after having a child and it can persist for years if you choose either not to address it, or, to assume that your relationship will flourish or return to how it was without giving it the attention it deserves.ARTArticleRemember Michael Jackson's Hit Man in the Mirror?CHANGE YOUR WAYS TO CHANGE YOUR RELATIONSHIP ARTArticleSee it, Smell it, Taste it! How to Create the Perfect HolidayEvery year in December, magazines cover the same old story, how to survive the holidays. Every year they generally say the same thing; keep it simple, have a plan, be HoEvery year in December, magazines cover the same old story, how to survive the holidays. Every year they generally say the same thing; keep it simple, have a plan, be organized, don’t worry. It’s pretty much just recycled and repackaged advice year after year.ARTArticleSeeing the Beloved in Everyone - Part 1What if instead of looking around a workshop (or online even before it starts), or at an event you're at, or party you were invited to, and deciding there's no one there you're attracted to, no "mate material," no one there you want to have sex with...what if... INSTEAD -- you saw EVERYONE AS A POTENTIAL LIFE PARTNER??? How would that be for you? Imagine walking into a room of 100 people, half of them the gender you're attracted to and knowing deep in your heart that all of them are possible life partners, soul mates, dating prospects, lovers? How cool would that be?ARTArticleSeeing the Beloved in Everyone - Part 2(This article is the second one of a series on seeing the Beloved in Everyone). Do you have to BELIEVE that everyone you come across with is a potential life partner? Or best friend? Or lover, beloved in order for this practice to work? Well, YES. But also NO. In some way, this is a "fake it 'til you make it" practice. Because OF COURSE you don't fully believe that everyone in the workshop room is potential love of yours. Not if you ask and respond with your mind, with your thinking/assessing/judging mind.ARTArticleSeeing the Beloved in Everyone - Part 2(This article is the second one of a series on seeing the Beloved in Everyone). Do you have to BELIEVE that everyone you come across with is a potential life partner? Or best friend? Or lover, beloved in order for this practice to work? Well, YES. But also NO. In some way, this is a "fake it 'til you make it" practice. Because OF COURSE you don't fully believe that everyone in the workshop room is potential love of yours. Not if you ask and respond with your mind, with your thinking/assessing/judging mind.ARTArticleSick & Tired of Doing Everything in Your Relationship? STOP! This is the Secret to Happiness…Does it feel like everything is up to you to make the relationship work? Does everything seem one-sided right now? Do you feel you are the only one taking care of the important stuff? If yes that’s totally natural Relationships are like a seesaw The more one person does something, the less the other one will do. The more one person wants or worries about something the less the other one will want it or worry about it. The more one person takes care of something the less the other will be bothered.ARTArticleThe Flip Side of LoveLast week I was hurt because of something my husband said to me. I was hurt, but at the same time, he felt frustrated and misunderstood. The evening ended abruptly. For me, it had been a lovely day spent with a good friend. That evening, I sat outside with my husband sharing the goodness that came from my day. The weather was beautiful, and we were enjoying a glass of wine together. The abrupt ending to a lovely evening was one of those dreadful, unanticipated moments that happen in relationships.ARTArticleThe Modern Practice of PujaSUMMARY: Puja is an ancient cultural tradition that has unknown roots. Some scholars believe that the practice began during Vedic times (1500 – 600 BCE) where the word puja has been found in the Sutras (which were composed to describe domestic rites, prayers, rituals). In these years, it appears that puja mostly referred to the time when a priest was visiting a home to offer a ritual to the family. A deity was being honored and was considered an invited guest.The puja ritual helped the family embrace the god/goddess’ spiritual essence so that it permeated the home and the people in it.ARTArticleThoughts and PrayersIn recent months, there have been a startling number of catastrophic incidences: devastating hurricanes that affected multitudes; thousands left homeless, without water, and in many cases, searching for loved ones; multiple mass shootings in which hundreds were killed and many more injured, not to mention all the fires and floods that have brought down entire cities to their knees. It hasn't been pretty.ARTArticleTips to Getting Through Rough Patches in Your RelationshipOne of the biggest issues that couples face is that after the first few blissful months or years together we begin to see our partner’s flaws, the things we don’t like and the things that upset us and annoy us. When we initially fall in love it is with the feeling it gives us. We feel on top of the world when we are in love and without realizing it we soon become oblivious to the reality of what it really means to be living with another person who has issues, fears, problems and insecurities of their own.ARTArticleTo Stay or Leave a Struggling Marriage?Today we live in an age that promotes self-awareness BUT when it comes to relationships, it fails to show us how to use our self-awareness to arrive at good decisions. Most of the advice we get makes our problems even worse. There are literally millions of men and women ambivalent about whether to stay in or leave their marriage. If this is you, I will share why you MUST get out of limbo for the sake of your sanity, health and relationship.ARTArticleTurning Passion Into Desire – Why You Should Read “My Darling Child Shiloh” By Aaron OzeeHave you ever asked yourself why you wake up every morning? Well, what was your answer? I just imagined asking myself the same question and my answer is “passion”. Is that your answer too? Then you should know that excitement is what keeps us awake at night and urges us to conquer our greatest desires.r ARTArticleWhat do we Mean by Honesty in Relationships?When it comes to romantic relationships, what is the most important thing you look for in a person? Although many will have a different answer, the one thing that tops the list for most people (or at least makes their top 3!) is honesty. I agree, honesty is very important. It’s one of the most important aspects of a relationship. However, we must ask ourselves, “What do we mean when we say that we want honesty from another person?” Most people mean that they want someone who “won’t lie to them” or “keep secrets,” but the question of honesty goes beyond lying and secrets. Honest Honesty:r ARTArticleWhat it Really Takes to Get Good Grades (and it’s Not about Being Smart)If you’ve ever wondered how to get good grades, maybe something like this has gone through your mind… I’m not good at languages. History isn’t my thing. I’m not a math person. How to get good grades I often hear comments like this from my clients when they’re explaining a low test score or struggling with a tricky assignment. These comments seem logical in the moment. But they’re not. In fact, statements like these are part of one of the biggest ever myths about learning.ARTArticleWhat it Really Takes to Get Good Grades (and it’s Not about Being Smart)If you’ve ever wondered how to get good grades, maybe something like this has gone through your mind… I’m not good at languages. History isn’t my thing. I’m not a math person. I often hear comments like this from my clients when they’re explaining a low test score or struggling with a tricky assignment. These comments seem logical in the moment. But they’re not. In fact, statements like these are part of one of the biggest ever myths about learning.ARTArticleWhat Torch Are You Carrying?Greetings from the Sonoma Ashram in Califo ia. It’s a beautiful place to breathe deeply, go inside and pay attention to how I am being with myself. How deeply am I loving myself? What parts of me need even more love?ARTArticleWhen Life Hands You Lemons . . .When Life Hands You Lemons . . . . . . Make lemonade. You’ve all heard the saying, but what does it mean? Essentially it means to have an “I can do it,” attitude, an optimistic view in the face of misfortune, or adversity. Since lemons are considered bitter, and lemonade sweet, you’re basically making the best out of a bad situation.ARTArticleWho Wears the Pants in Your Relationship? Marriage Problems -5 Signs of Controlling BehaviourWe all know the saying ‘Who wears the pants in your relationship’ but have you ever taken a step back and really thought about it? Who wears the pants in your relationship? Do you both wear them, or does one of you predominantly wear the pants and control the relationship? Either way, a healthy relationship is one that is balanced, where both partners can be themselves and just as importantly, feel good about themselves. Of all the different marriage problems signs, control issues are very common.ARTArticleWhy Marriage Counselling Can Fail & What to Avoid” 75% of people say they’re Worse off or Even Divorced after Marriage Counseling! Don’t Let That Happen To You! Today I got an email from a couple who I was working with this month to strengthen their relationship. With their permission, they have let me share their story in order to help and inspire others and give hope that it is not only possible to transform your relationship, but that you change things quickly.ARTArticleYou Don’t Get to Choose, So You Don’t Get to Judge!Congratulations! You have just been born! Happy birthday! If I am correct, and I’m pretty sure that I am, you did not get to choose your parents. You did not get to choose into what country you were born. You did not get to choose your sex. You did not get to choose what you look like. Furthermore, now that you are here on Planet Earth, you don’t get to choose the religion, if any, you’ll be taught. At least while you’re a baby, and as you grow. You don’t get to choose whether you have siblings, or how many, if you do.r ARTArticle“REAL RAPE”This past weekend I read an article in the New York Times Sunday Magazine entitled “To Catch A Rapist”. It highlighted the work of a dedicated inspector and some of her colleagues in the Special Victims Unit of Law Enforcement in New Haven, Conn. and the repeated roadblocks they come up against trying to prosecute sexual assault cases. It was powerful and informative and I would encourage anyone reading this to take a look at that article as well. First some statistics:ARTArticle12 ‘Don’ts’ for Fighting FairConflict is tough for most people. We don’t like it. It threatens us and makes us feel bad. Makes us feel defensive. But we can feel a whole lot better about fighting if we have rules to guide us.ARTArticle3 Ways to Help Your Teen Manage School StressMost teens (83%) say that school is a significant source of stress in their life. Here's how you can help your teen manage school stress... For teens, stress looks like this: Getting to school late -Feeling irritable -Feeling tired a lot -Crying a lot...or snapping at you -Leaving things until the last minute, and then panicking If you’re like most parents, you want to help your teen manage school stress...but sometimes you’re not sure how. Or you have some ideas about what might help, but your teen isn’t listening. Laying bricks and a shift in perspective ARTArticle4 Online Dating Tips for BeginnersOnce you have decided to take the plunge and to start Internet dating, there are some important basics that you need to know. Many people set themselves up with the expectation that love is just around the corner and will drop into their laps in an instant, metaphorically speaking but just because there are many more opportunities to date via the Internet, it doesn’t mean you will meet the love of your life in an instant.ARTArticle5 Steps to Overcome Divorce & Separation AnxietyFear of an uncertain future can stop us from doing great things, and it can keep us holding onto things and habits that are hurting us. Today I will share 5 steps to deal with separation and divorce anxiety. I think it is fair to say, that the majority of us from time to time wonder what the future will be like. Whether we will be happy, have enough money and be healthy etc. But when you are contemplating, going through or coming out of divorce anxiety over the future can be overwhelming and unbearable at times.ARTArticle5 Steps to settling your Child into SchoolEasing your young child out of your care and into school can be stressful and emotional for parents and children alike and end in crying and clingy behaviour. As parents we would all really like to see our children walk into their new environment with some confidence and eage ess to make friends and learn new things. Here are five tried and tested tips to help. 1. Be prepared;ARTArticleA child remembers what he is – she knows that she is more than her bodyThe child came to earth free as the wind and bright as the sun… He brought with him all the knowledge of the Universe… She remembers… He knows that he is more than his body… She knows that she is the Light… They know that the body is just a vehicle on the journey of experiences… Each cell in the body knows that if we treat the body temple right - the memories of the Source will stay forever… It is not an easy task for the soul to enter this 3 rd dimensional limited world… So here on earth they have invented “labels” and medications…

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