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ARTArticleWhat is Tantra?True Shivaic Tantra is part of an ancient Spiritual practice, which elevated sexuality to a sublime meditative state. The sexual aspect was only part of a bigger experience. Some sources date Indian Tantric origins up to 3000 or more years ago. It generally is not practiced openly and has been underground for hundreds of years. It was Goddess based and the feminine reigned supreme. Some scholars and spiritual teachers express resentment at the adulteration, which has occurred in the West's interpretation of a complex spiritual practice our culture cannot fully understand.ARTArticleWhat's the Tone of Your Home?Parents play a lead role in setting the overall tone in their families. Parents whose overall tone tends to be negative often have homes filled with stress and tension. While parents who take a more positive approach create calmer, happier homes. A Home Filled with Tension One mom told me about all the stress in her home. One of her three sons was doing very poorly in school. She and her husband were constantly nagging Joe to do his homework although it didn't seem to help much.ARTArticleWhen Jealousy Visits Your RelationshipPractically everyone whose been in a serious romantic relationship with all of the deliciously intense and passionate feelings that go with it, have at one time or another experienced jealousy, which is really the fear that ---to some degree--- your partner is not being exclusive to you either physically or emotionally. But it’s what you do with your feelings of jealousy that can bring you closer together or ultimately tear your relationship apart.ARTArticleWhen Should You Discuss the "R" Word--Relationship?For many men (and women) it seems the word, relationship has become a “bad” word. Remember when you were in grade school, worried about getting caught using one of George Carlin’s “7 Words You Can Never Say on Television?” These words were loaded. You discussed them with your friends. You questioned their meaning. You practiced saying them, hoping you wouldn’t get caught, or that you had enough zeal, zest behind each one so that the syllables would roll off your tongue easily. Flawlessly. And in this same way, I hear women questioning the use of the “r” word.ARTArticleWhen Someone Rejects You, Who Are They Rejecting?The fear of rejection is a huge issue in relationships. For some, the fear is so huge that it stops them from being in a relationship. For others, it plagues them throughout their relationships and causes much anxiety. Rejection is a part of life, and learning to lovingly manage it is very important to our wellbeing. To help you learn to move beyond the fear of rejection, I would like to help you see who a person is rejecting when they reject you. Are they rejecting your wounded self or your core Self?ARTArticleWhen Your Relationship is Rocky, Look Right at Your ExpectationsOne of the best ways to think of a relationship on the rocks is to reflect on your expectations for your relationship. What are they? What is it that you really want from your partner? What could your partner do now that would — from your point of view — make the relationship work again? Make a comprehensive list, and pay special attention to what you now recognize your unique issues to be.ARTArticleWho Do You Want To Be This Christmas?Christmas is almost here and you get to decide who you want to be. I don't mean if you want to be Santa Claus. I mean what kind of person do you want to be? Do you want to be a person who chooses your actions according to your fears of rejection, of getting hurt, of ridicule, or of being taken advantage of? Or do you want to be a person who chooses your actions from your deep desire to be a kind, loving, caring person?ARTArticleWho is the Inspirational Leader in Your Organization? Could it Be You?Who is the inspirational leader in your organization? A company needs just one focal person to bear the flag, as a Civil War flag bearer would ride in front of a cavalry unit, showing the way into battle with a symbol of pride. Employees long to work for organizations in which there is a purpose bigger than just a paycheck, where employees are appreciated, and where managers care about them as people. They need an inspirational leader.ARTArticleWhy are Partners UnfaithfulWhy are Partners Unfaithful Over the years I have been asked “Why did he/she do it” below are reasons that partners make the choice to go outside the marriage. This is a list of 13 of the most common reasons that people go outside of the marriage for an affair is not a justification, it is intended to shed some light on what is going on with the unfaithful partner. 1. They are conflict avoiders and have a hard time expressing themselves 2. They feel unheard 3. They feel neglected 4. They are angry at their spouse 5. They are bored with the relationship 6.ARTArticleWhy Are You Still Single?Why Are You Still Single Jo"? I can still remember cringing at being asked that question by well meaning friends and family members and my response really depended on my hormones and how I felt about being single at the time. For the most part, those that know and love us, ask from good intentions. They think we are just awesome and can’t understand why we are still single but it can still feel as if we are being told there must be something wrong with us.ARTArticleWhy Relationships Are A Test Of Endurance, Not Speed.As an Intuitive & Tarot Counselor who specializes in love and relationships I am presented with a host of relationship questions and requests asking for relationship advice. I have been asked on more than a thousand occasions about when a relationship should evolve to “the next phase”. Sometimes they have been involved for a long time without seeing things progress and sometimes they are just meeting someone and are wondering whether it’s worth their time but in either situation, they tend to place emphasis on the pace and direction the relationship will take.ARTArticleYour Relationship is in Trouble: Has Your Partner Changed or Just Your View of Then Vs. Now?The title of a great and popular old Off-Broadway play captures one of the most common sentiments I've seen when working with distressed couples: I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change.r ARTArticle"Meet Your Man 2013 Challenge" Day #1 - Get Some Serious Mojo Going in the Self-Love Department!Aloha Dignity Daters, and welcome to the “Meet Your Man 2013 Challenge – 3 Steps to Tell the Difference Between a Player and the Guy Who Is Looking For Love!” Woot to the Woot Woot! Here’s the deal: 2013 is the year of a new you. If you’re over falling for the same types of men and feel like your relationships in 2012 (and prior) always seem to be going nowhere fast, then the New Year is the best time to take a fresh approach! Forget “The Rules”. Say goodbye to your go-to date on a lonely Saturday night: work. And challenge yourself to meet your man in 2013.r ARTArticle"Meet Your Man 2013 Challenge" Day #2 - Ramp Up Your Feminine Sex Appeal without Being Slutty!Aloha Dignity Daters, and welcome to day two of the "Meet Your Man 2013 Challenge: 3 Steps to Tell the Difference Between a Player and the Guy Who is Looking For Love!" If you're still with us it means you are ready for the next step in the "Super Me" Meet Your Man Challenge! You should applaud yourself for being here, and for being brave and bold in the New Year. If you continue to follow these three simple steps, you will be on your way to a new and improved you, easily able to attract (and recognize) the quality man who is truly looking for love.ARTArticle"Meet Your Man 2013 Challenge" Day #3: Honing Your Dating Savvy - Get Any Man to Pursue YouAloha Dignity Daters, and welcome to the final day of the “Meet Your Man 2013 Challenge – 3 Steps to Tell the Difference Between a Player and the Guy Who is Looking for Love!” Today’s challenge, along with The Super Me 14-Day Challenge, is going to put you exactly where you need to be to find your man in 2013. And the final step of the “Meet Your Man Challenge” is… Step Three: Honing Your Dating Savvy – Get Any Man to Pursue You ARTArticle*** Emotional Dependency vs. Emotional FreedomWhat is Emotional Dependency? Lydia consulted with me because her relationship with her husband, Andrew, was falling apart. Andrew had moved out, stating that he could no longer tolerate Lydia's neediness and constant pull on him to make her feel loved and secure. Now that they were separated, Lydia's emotional dependency was getting even worse. She was deeply addicted to Andrew making her feel better, if only through a brief text message.ARTArticle*** Giving Up: Have You Given Up on Yourself?"I feel like giving up," Emma told me in our first phone session. "I've worked and worked on myself and I'm still miserable. I've had years of therapy and I still feel unbearably depressed. Nothing is working." "It sounds to me like you are abandoning yourself."ARTArticle*** It's All About Love!What is life REALLY all about? It's all about love! But what does this mean? Most people, when thinking about love, think about BEING LOVED. But, as an adult, the deeper soul's journey is not about being loved - it is about BEING LOVING. For small children, the main focus is on being loved, ...ARTArticle*** Letting Go Of A Sugar AddictionHave you tried unsuccessfully to heal a sugar addiction? Here's how! Are you sugar addicted? You are not alone!ARTArticle*** Relationship Breakup: Heartbreak and HealingLindsay called me for counseling because her boyfriend of 18 months had just ended their relationship. Lindsay, 28, had been sure that Jake was "Mr. Right." "I am so heartbroken," sobbed Lindsay. "I don't know how I'm going to get through this. It feels like my heart is breaking apart. I love Jake so much and I thought he loved me too. I don't get how this could have happened, or why it happened. I feel like I can't live without him." "Tell me about your relationship with Jake."ARTArticle*** Relationships: Giving Yourself Up Can Kill YouYears ago, when on a book tour for our book, "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?", my ex-husband and I had dinner with a couple on the East Coast with whom he had become friends. I connected with Allison (not her real name) immediately. Warm and open, I could see that she was a deeply caring woman. On the other hand, her husband Ken, while overtly charming, had a huge black hole inside that felt like a vacuum cleaner sucking the energy out of everyone. His need for attention was overwhelming to me.ARTArticle*** Relationships: The Art of ListeningIn 1974, Dr. Virginia Satir presented the concept of mirroring in her groundbreaking book, "Conjoint Family Therapy." In 1975 Dr. Thomas Gordon wrote a best-selling book called "Parent Effectiveness Training." In the book he taught parents to "active listen," which ...ARTArticle*** What Creates Confidence?The Encarta World English Dictionary defines "confidence" as "a belief or self-assurance in your ability to succeed." We all know people who appear to be very confident professionally, yet when it comes to personal relationships, appear to be very insecure. Personal confidence is totally different than professional confidence in that personal confidence is about who you are and professional confidence is about what you do. Personal Confidence ARTArticle*** Why Don't I Have Friends?"Why don't I have friends?" asked Isabella in one of our phone counseling sessions. Isabella, 25 and very attractive, was having a problem that many people have. Sometimes, if people don't keep their high school friends or meet friends in college or at work, they may have trouble making friends. Yet there are many people who seem to be able to make friends wherever they go. What is the difference betwee Isabella and these people who easily make friends? Actually, there is a big difference.ARTArticle***"Can We Be Friends After A Relationship Ends?”Discover what you may need to address before deciding whether you can be friends with an ex partner. Elise writes: "My partner and I separated a year ago. My partner now wants to finalize the relationship but work on being 'friends'. I am having difficulty connecting as just 'friends', it seems to trigger all my old wounds of rejection and abandonment. Do you have any advice?"ARTArticle***"I Don't Know How To Give Her What She Wants From Me."________________________________________ Do you sometimes feel like you try to give your partner the connection he or she wants and can't figure out how? ________________________________________ARTArticle***"I Feel Empty"If you feel empty, you are not alone in feeling this way. Many people feel empty inside, and most people who feel empty have some deep false beliefs regarding why they feel empty. Below are some of these false beliefs. I feel empty because: • My partner is not giving me enough love and attention. • I don't have a partner. • I'm bored because my partner doesn't provide me with enough stimulation.ARTArticle***"It's Not Fair!"________________________________________ Do you continue to believe, in the face of all evidence to the contrary, that life should be fair? Discover a new way of looking at fai ess. ________________________________________ "Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian." - Dennis Wholey "It's not fair!" yells eight-year old Calvin when his six-year old sister gets a bigger piece of pie.ARTArticle***3 Steps to Healing from Betrayal________________________________________ Betrayal is one of the hardest things to go through, and it is vitally important that you deal with it in a way that doesn’t cause you even more pain. ________________________________________ It is devastating when someone whom we believe cares about us betrays us – lies, cheats, breaks a sacred promise, hurts us behind our back, steals from us, turns others against us and so on. The Steps to Healing From Betrayal 1. Releasing the feelings rather than staying stuck with them ARTArticle***Addicted to Porn?________________________________________ Are you addicted to porn and not feeling good about it? Discover the likely underlying cause and what to do about it. ________________________________________ I received the following question when I was conducting a webinar on sexual addiction: "I have had a pornography addiction since I was a teenager. I am now in my mid 30's. For the past four months I have abstained through Inner Child work, but two days ago I visited a porn site and masturbated. I feel really sad about this. What is the best way to address this?"

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