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ARTArticle3 Tips to Prevent an Affair in Your RelationshipJanet can't believe how far apart she and her husband Mark have grown. To Janet, her husband seems nothing like the man that she married almost 20 years ago. That man wouldn't have had an affair. To be fair, she has changed as well. When Janet looks at the way she sometimes acts when she's around Mark, she recognizes that she's not even close to the person she was when they first fell in love. Wishing that she could somehow turn back time, Janet wonders how she and Mark might have prevented the infidelity, the distance and the pain.ARTArticle3 Ways He's Telling You He Is Not Going To Marry YouI want to spare you the disappointment of getting your hopes up over a man who's going to waste your time, get you to fall for him and then leave. You can find out early in a relationship which men are good prospects for marriage and avoid a lot of heartache. But you need to pay attention, you can't sweep things you don't want to see under the rug or pretend they don't matter. You don't want to make the mistake of giving up your heart and your freedom to a man who only wants to use you.ARTArticle3 Ways to Find True Relief from Relationship PainWhen you are in pain because of something that's happened in your love relationship or marriage, it can seem like there's nothing else in your life but the hurt and upset way you feel. You may have discovered that your partner lied to or cheated on you. Or perhaps you and your mate can't seem to get along and your relationship is riddled with conflict most of the time. It could also be that you feel unappreciated, neglected or unloved. No matter what has happened, the pain that you are feeling can be intense at times.ARTArticle4 Soul Mate Myths: Soul Connections and Man-Woman Love Limiting BeliefsI was one of those people who believed with everything in me that the day I met my soul mate the world would click! We would look into each other's eyes from across the room, communicate telepathically and it would feel magical (like in the movies and romance novels). He would then walk up to me (our eyes locked in a soulful gaze), take my hand and we would waltz into the beautiful sunset where we would live happily ever after - no arguments, no disagreements etc. That's how it should be -- one man, one woman, one soulful look and Utopia.ARTArticle4 Tips for a Cheater: Get Your Marriage Back on TrackTo recover from infidelity and save your marriage: 1. Tell the Truth. Assuming your spouse found out, you didn't confess—this is the time to tell the whole truth. It's probably best done with a therapist present, to keep a lid on the emotional reactions. 2. Give your Spouse the Power.ARTArticle7 Must Do's Before Moving InNumber Seven May Be A Little Shocking Dr. Romance’s three tips to maintaining sanity during divorce. According to results from a recent GfK Roper poll, more than 80 percent of divorced Americans still believe in marriage, but we all know more than half of marriages don’t make it, for various reasons.ARTArticleA Good CryAt the end of a client-packed day, the trash can in my office is often overflowing with used tissues. Richard, seeing this, usually comments; "Good day, huh?" and we both laugh. He knows that, when clients cry, they're usually breaking through and healing something. I've been known to joke with clients that I'd like to create a "crying spa:" a gorgeous resort with boxes of the finest tissues everywhere, even towels, which are great for a really good cry.ARTArticleA New Way Of DatingCircular Dating is a tool used in the Rori Raye (www.coachrori.com) Method of relationship Coaching. Let me start off by saying that Circular Dating is NOT about “dating” a whole bunch of men at one time. Circular Dating is interacting with men! Circular Dating is all about YOU. Circular Dating is about keeping the focus on you. Actually, getting to the heart of it, Circular Dating is about men focusing on you! Circular Dating is about the intentions of men who are focusing on you. YOU are the target of their intentions andr ARTArticleA-Z Guide For Successful Singles. B is for BeliefsYour beliefs affect your reality – they are the “lens” through which you see, experience, interpret, and react to what goes on in your world. Imagine that I came from another planet (some of my friends think I do) and I asked you to describe your world to me. Now imagine wearing a pair of glasses with a blue lens in it – what color would the description of your world be to me? Now imagine wearing a pair of glasses with a yellow lens in it – what colour would the description of your world be now?ARTArticleAdvice On How I Can Get My Ex Boyfriend BackI need advice on how I can get my ex boyfriend back again; I'm going to use a bit of an analogy here so please bear with me as I paint the picture. Winning is like figuring in a competition. You can't win something you didn't fight or work so hard for, right? So if you want to win your ex-boyfriend back (read: heart, mind and soul), you have to dedicate your full and concerted effort to the task. And there are a lot of things that you have to do if you're absolutely sure you want him back again. And each of them will require a full commitment from you.ARTArticleAfter A Break Up How To Get Him-Her Back - Things To Say To Win Your Boyfriend BackWhen you have a relationship break up there are three scenarios one might encounter. The first is basically getting dumped and having to feel the rejection by someone you thought was special to you. Then there is the break up which brings on the feeling of despair and wondering what could have been done to prevent it. Lastly is the worst, being dumped by your significant other for another guy or girl. This would be the worst relationship break up experience. The complete solution to get your ex back is provided at the last paragraph of this write-up, meanwhile lets build the foundation.ARTArticleApology and ForgivenessIn my clinical experience, I've encountered many clients who are afraid to admit they're wrong. This comes from a culture of blaming and accusingwhere one's early family may have picked a "culprit" when something went wrong, and focused on blame, rather than on fixing the problem and healing the hurt. People with such experiences approach every situation as if they're on trial, and they compulsively try to convince everyone they're not guilty. They have no patterns to follow for apology and forgiveness.ARTArticleAre You CEO Of Your Relationship?If You're Fighting About Money, Read These Five Tips In our society, money represents power, success, and often even your value as a person. We say (misquoting the Bible,) “Money is the root of all evil," or “money is power;” or “he who has the gold, makes the rules.” We consider it spiritual to take a vow of poverty, and we prosecute and convict people who get greedy.ARTArticleAre You in a Sexless Marriage?Are you in a sexless marriage? I’m a sex therapist in Orange County, CA and I assure you, you are not alone! About 25% of all marriages are “sexless,” meaning that the couple has sex fewer than one to two dozen times a year. Sometimes marriages naturally go through dry spells. A partner might be sick, be pulled by care-giving demands, or absent due to military or other job obligations. But when couples go for a year or longer without connecting in the bedroom, there’s a problem. What causes a sexless marriage?ARTArticleAre You Remarried?Don't Let Divorce Muddy Your Marriage - 3 Tips Are you remarried? Are you trying to make this new relationship work. Dr. Romance offers three tips to help this new marriage work better than the first one. 1. Understand your baggage.ARTArticleAre You Sex-Starved?If You're In A Sexless Marriage, You Need These Tips Now ARTArticleAre You The One Who Wanted It To Work?3 Must Do's + 2 Don'ts That Can Help You Today Are you about to be dumped? Your mate/date is losing interest? The signs are: lack of attention in conversation and being together; irritability -- refusal to talk about it, no sex or less interest. Here's what to do if you ARE dumped. 1. DO put it in perspective: If you're dumped, it hurts, but count your lucky stars. You don’t have a relationship if the other person's not really interested. 2. DO understand that there were problems already:ARTArticleAsking for What you Wantb> In my counseling office, I see a lot of damage done because people don't know how to ask for what they want, or don't think it's OK. Not asking for what you want means you'll eventually resent somebody, and that leads to a lot of strife. So today, I thought I'd give some hints about how to ask for what you want. To really be successful, you need to understand the difference between asking and demanding, and how to approach different people.ARTArticleAspects of LoveAh, love! What rapturous, torturous words have been set down to try and capture the essence of love. Those clever Greeks, who invented the Olympics, also invented many names for love—Cupid, Eros, Venus, Aphrodite—and each name represented an aspect of love. The ancient Greeks had several words for several categories of love—they did not attempt to squeeze all of it into four little letters! Eros was erotic, or sexual love; Philos was brotherly love; Agape was altruistic, spiritual love. The Latin poet Ovid spoke of amor ludens, or playful love—love as a game.ARTArticleAttitude AdjustmentI have written in this column recently about emotional hygiene, and doing the necessary maintenance on feelings as well as your physical body and household. Health reminders tell us to wash our hands frequently to prevent transmittal of diseases. Did you know you can "wash" your mood, too, and give yourself an attitude adjustment whenever you want to?ARTArticleAttitude: From Negative to GratitudeDespite the occasional temporary setback, my life is good, and I'm grateful. It wasn't always that way, however. At 18, just after I left for college, I was essentially orphaned, and have had to go from no education or support to finding a purpose, supporting myself through a PhD, and developing four businesses to do that. I also recovered from an abusive marriage, and now have been happily married for 23 years, and in successful private practice since 1978.ARTArticleAttract Love By Being In Love With You“For all ete ity you will be with you. There is no escaping your Self.”rn~ Jacob Glass If there were ever a reason to make the effort to love and appreciate who you are, this would be it. Just imagine you’ll be keeping yourself company for all time — so you better find a way to enjoy who you are. There are many benefits to loving yourself – one is having that love to give in a relationship. As they say, “You can’t give what you don’t have.”ARTArticleAutonomy vs DependencySelf-determination and self-respect are the necessary keys to take full responsibility for and control over your own life. Without these keys, it's easy to be caught up in the fantasy that there is someone else who will make it better, who can or should take total care of you, who is able to be responsible for you more effectively than you can yourself.ARTArticleBaby Boomer? Getting Divorced?Two Must Know Tips If You're A Boomer Facing Divorce Divorce is a shock to anyone, but especially older marrieds, who may have been together for a long time. You are likely to be in shock for quite a while, feel numb and lost, and then have delayed grief. Here are two tips to help if you're a Baby Boomer or beyond and you're getting divorced after a long marriage. 1. Get emotional support.r ARTArticleBet You Don't Know How To ApologizeThere Are Four Steps. Are You Doing All Of Them? Are you and your partner having a tough time getting over an argument? Here are some tips to help. 1. Surrender to your responsibility. When you become aware that you have made a mistake, admit it and apologize. Use it as an opportunity to learn and grow. You don’t have to be afraid of punishment or rejection –- apologizing makes it easier to be forgiven. 2. Don’t be afraid to admit you're wrong.ARTArticleBetter Intimacy, Better SexAs a counselor, I get a lot of clients who are worried about intimacy and sex. Romance books are a lovely escape from reality, and can help reduce your stress from daily frustrations. And, you can even learn a few tricks to enhance your relationship. The danger comes in if you begin to believe in the fantasy, compare your real-life partner to a fictional character, and become dissatisfied and feel unfulfilled. One of the attractive things about romance heroes is that they do all the work, but in a real-life rela ARTArticleBeware: An Internet Dating Horror StoryI feel compelled to write this warning to all you wonderful women who have been reading my blog for the last 3 years. I want to tell you about my newest client and give you a heads-up if you’re Internet dating. Marcie is 52 years old and a highly accomplished woman. She’s recently divorced from a long marriage and has a beautiful 24-year-old daughter. She’s a world traveler and has spent much of her life helping women to find their authentic voice and their true-life path.ARTArticleBOO! WHO'S SCARING YOU? (HALLOWE'EN OR ANY OTHER TIME)Are you tricking or treating yourself? What kinds of things do you say to yourself throughout the day? Are they loving or hurtful? Do they motivate and encourage or paralyze and frighten you? And what about those things that others say to you? How do you interpret them? So often we put a dark mental filter over something that's been said, without checking our interpretation out with that person, or ourselves.ARTArticleBook Excerpt: The Waltz of LoveHere is an excerpt from the book I think you might enjoy, that time in your life when you finally meet that one person who captures your attention like no other. The waltz of love: One of the most incredible experiences in life Then you meet him or her. What an emotionally exciting time, probably one of the most wonderful times in your life. When you eventually fall in love with the person who you decide you want to spend the rest of your life with you actually develop an unconscious emotional attraction to that person called love.ARTArticleBook Review - Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of LoveAre you looking to enrich a healthy relationship, revitalize a tired one, or rescue one gone awry? We all want a lifetime of love, support, and companionship. But sometimes we need a little help. Enter Dr. Sue Johnson, developer of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy and “the best couple therapist in the world,” according to bestselling relationship expert Dr. John Gottman.

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