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30 resources

ARTArticleSelf-Help Tips - Why Are People Resistant to Change?Many people who have been involved in any type of personal growth or self development work and have subsequently sensed a real change in their inner world, will often forget the real difficulty and fear involved in doing any type of work that necessitates change.ARTArticleShifting the Grief Healing Paradigm-Authentic Grief HealingWhile grief is a universal experience, the mou ing process varies from family to family and from culture to culture. What I am referring to as the mou ing process are the rituals that most of us grow up with about how to behave and how to speak when confronted with a loss. In essence, mou ing rituals can be referred to as habits or paradigms. These habits or rituals are usually not questioned.ARTArticleSigns of Sexual AddictionSigns of Sexual Addiction (Based upo Patrick Carnes work) 1. Loss of Control • Out of control sexual behavior predominates • The addict cannot control the extent, duration and regularity of his/her sexual behavior • Behavior excesses continue despite clear signs of danger (consequences)rn-- Compulsive masturbation -- Compulsive pornography use -- Chronic affairs -- Exhibitionism: intrusive "flaunting/showing"rn-- Dangerous sexual practices, i.e., asphyxiation -- Prostitution -- Anonymous sex (at porn shops, bars, etc.)rn-- Voyeurism: intrusive "watching"ARTArticleSItuational Leadership and Success CoachingLeadership is defined as “someone who guides or directs a group.” There are many ways to do this. The most visible and probably the most ineffective is to yell at people until they do something that looks like what you want them to do. That works once. But true situational leadership - that focuses on the group, the conditions, and the goals - is a much more effective and long lasting method of leadership.ARTArticleSix guidelines on how to improve your patience and tolerance for your family during the holidaysMost people experience a great deal of stress in that period of time betwee Thanksgiving and New Years, fondly known as “The Holidays”. Many of us, find ourselves becoming irritable, with our patience and tolerance stretched to the limit. Much of the impatience and intolerance involves unrealistic and/or unreasonable expectations of others, especially those we are closest to. Being raised in our own individual families of origin seems to set us up for conflicts about expectations for the holidays.ARTArticleSix Super Simple Guidelines for Developing Your Communication Skills By Improving Your Ability to ListenBuilding a solid foundation for the development of good communication skills involves learning how to listen effectively. There are several elements of effective listening. These elements include attention, reflection, ability to tolerate tension, and ability to challenge the assumptions that are usually made. When teaching couples how to change how they talk to each other, active listening is stressed. Much of the time, poor listening skills are at the heart of couple communication problems. You can't have effective communication without good listening skills.ARTArticleSlaying the Dragon of Distraction with Inner Mind Game MasteryYou know the feeling. There’s an important project to work on and you know that once you complete it, you’ll not only be able to relax but you’ll also be able to generate revenue from the venture. However, you find yourself putting it off - doing everything else but working on it. Why? We are not one-dimensional; we have multiple inner lives that work constantly trying to help us with what we say we want. If there is incongruence in your values or beliefs between the conscious mind and your subconscious, the subconscious mind will win.ARTArticleSome Thoughts And Pointers On MeditationI was recently asked to give my take on meditation. Q Is there an exercise you can recommend for strengthening one's psychic abilities? I replied, Don't HESITATE! MEDITATE..MEDITATE...MEDITATE. Then meditate some more. If you are serious about your psychic development you got to have your MEDS. ..And you need them daily for them to work. Meditation is very serious soul business, and does wonders to maintain some calm amidst the clutter and chaos of our daily lives. However, let's please keep our sense of humor as well.ARTArticleSome Thoughts On And A Personal Experience With TelepathySome Thoughts On And A Personal Experience With Telepathy 1,400 words Since I was a young child I was able to sometimes sense things that people were thinking. Sometimes I would hear actual words. However, I was too shy to ever mention anything or really try to develop it. To be honest, it kind of scared me and I did not think my parents or my pastor or the people at church would welcome such talk from a child who was trying to be a good Christian boy. So I kept quiet and the ability didn't go much further.ARTArticleSpecial Seasonal Steps for Food FreedomIt is holiday time again and time to think about a conscious celebration. The difference between what we think and want to feel like and what we actually experience, can drive even the most dedicated wellness woman into less than optimal choices with their eating and plans at this time of the year. Most of us are overtired, overbooked and over worked at this time of the year. Very bad planning, because it is actually the time to slow down, sit in the darkening days and contemplate our lives over the past months and year to come.ARTArticleSpiritual Terms - How Do You Deal With Anger?Dealing with anger comes at two particular levels - most important is realising that it is your problem, and secondly devising strategies to actually dealing with it. Most people, when they get angry about something will instinctively blame someone else, either a particular person or if they cannot find someone specific, often a more global entity. The instinct to blame other people or God for what is happening or what has happened to us or other people is perhaps one of the most basic instincts there is in human beings.ARTArticleSpiritual Terms - How Do You Give Hope to Someone?Giving hope to someone who needs it, whether their situation be a desperate one or simply a need for inspiration is perhaps the most important gift one can give, as well as in many ways being the most difficult thing to help instigate. It is often easier to give a false sense of hope than a real sense of hope, and this is often done as a reaction to a difficult situation that people find it difficult to cope with.ARTArticleSpiritual Terms - It's Ok to Be Human!When many people hear the word spiritual or spirituality, or any word associated with religion or spiritual terminology they immediately assume that the underlying idea or rationale behind it is that of becoming a good or a better person than they were before. To many if not most people, this is not a very attractive option for a number of reasons, most typically because they fear it involves giving up on a number of behaviours or goals in life that they believe are important to them, and they do not believe would be compatible with being a better or good person.ARTArticleSpiritual Terms - Self Acceptance Not Self ImprovementSelf-improvement has become something of a mantra and a watchword for a vast industry that has grown up around it in the last 30 perhaps 40 years. A lot of the self-improvement industry has flourished in the last 10 or 15 years with the growth of the Internet. Perhaps an inevitable consequence of the growth of the web, has been a freedom for people to peddle whatever wares they like online, alongside a lot of highly reputable and good sources of information.ARTArticleSpiritual Terms - The Value of ListeningQuite recently there was television footage of a politician surrounded by his advisers, listening to a voter telling him what she thought about a particular subject. The commentary was about how this politician had been listening to this woman, and was designed to show him in a more human light in paying attention to and listening to what people were telling him.ARTArticleSpiritual Terms - What Does the Serenity Prayer Actually Mean?The serenity prayer has a special place for many people, aside from its actual or little meaning, it has become something of a mantra for members of Alcoholics Anonymous and other 12 step fellowships.ARTArticleSpiritual Terms - Why Do People Isolate?Isolation is often thought of in physical terms, as being a process where people physically remove themselves from other people and live apart, either from society or from family and friends and other people. Isolation is sometimes thought of as a good thing, often in the context of someone who lives apart from other people in a spiritual or religious context, such as a hermit or a monk. Isolation is quite often confused inadvertently, with the idea of people living with a measure of solitude or separateness from other people.ARTArticleStop Feeling Controlled by a Difficult Family Member or ColleagueUsually people are “difficult” because they are going about getting their needs met in the only way they know how. They have very specific (and we might think “overly rigid”) ways of feeling powerful and having esteem; they focus narrowly on controlling things, situations, and people so that they can get the outcomes that will enable them to feel good. They are not able to feel good by connecting meaningfully with you for who you really are.ARTArticleStop Sabotaging Your SuccessIt’s Monday and you’ve got two weeks to produce a crucial project for a potential client that will make your company money and give you incredible exposure. You know it’s vital to complete the work and yet something holds you back from starting the venture. Whenever you find you have the time to work, you end up procrastinating and ignoring the BIG project.ARTArticleStop Throwing SpearsSometimes when we are scared, frightened, startled, we react with anger. It is a very natural reaction, probably based back in our cave man times. If something big and scary was approaching us, we had better react with a strong offense or we would get eaten. Unfortunately, that natural reaction that is embedded in our genes is not very useful today. Often times, the things that are startling us are not life or death. We do not need to throw a spear at a charging saber tooth cat.ARTArticleStress Coping – Do You Do It Well?Stress belongs to our lives like waves to seas. We all use coping styles to eliminate tension and anxiety rising from stress. Some strategies help very well, some can even kill you.ARTArticleTell Me Anything But Don't Tell Me To Stop TrainingHere you come with your signature limp and stifled grimace of pain. Your stark look of disappointment suggests that ice, anti-inflammatory drugs and electro stimulation therapy have collectively done little to alleviate your demoralizing leg pains. Your doctor, the reluctant physician, knows what’s coming next and how he would like to respond. However, fidelity to his Hippocratic Oath will not permit a surrender to the impulse to run and hide unde eath his desk.ARTArticleThe “Golden Rule”of the Helping ProfessionsThe “Golden Rule”of the Helping Professions An Excerpt from “The Human Magnet Syndrome – Why We Love People Who Hurt Us.” By Ross Rosenberg, M.Ed., LCPC, CADCARTArticleThe Amazing Magical Power Of Our Words And FeelingsI have read and heard so many times that that there is so much power in the spoken word and our feelings. I am reminded of a story I heard many years about a little old lady who had contracted cancer. When the doctor told her the news she simply looked out the window and stared into the distance with a dreamy look and grin on her face. He stood quietly a few moments, letting her assimilate the sad news he had just been obligated to reveal to her.ARTArticleThe Difference Between Irresponsible Exercises Of Parental Authority And Responsible Exercises Of Parental AuthorityAs a social worker I spent 6 years assessing the mental health treatment needs of adults who get caught in the revolving door to a state criminal justice system in New England. In piecing together the histories of these clients I spoke with their parents when these opportunities arise. What was often the case during these interviews is that these parents pled ignorance when it comes to how events in the lives of their families impacted their children. Clearly, these parents were either unwilling and/or unable to empathize and build bridges to their children’s rich inner worlds.ARTArticleThe Language of LoveThe Language of Love word count 970 I look at people walking down the street and think, You are not who you think you are. This is all a dream. It is not real. Then I look at me and say, “you are not real, either. What is real? I need to know. I need to see. I need to feel what is real. I want to communicate by some means other than human language, something that connects me to all life, not separates me from it. Perhaps I want to enter the realm of the “nameless”, or rather, experience myself in all things and people.ARTArticleThe Power of Playing"We don't stop playing because we grow old: we grow old because we stop playing" George Be ard Shaw Have you played lately? Really played? One of the things that I encourage all of my clients to do is to "play more". One of the symptoms of the disconnection from our Authentic Self is that we don't play. Many people stop playing when they are a young child--because they had to "grow up fast" to deal with the challenging issues going on in their home.ARTArticleThe Skinny on ResilienceShe was crying and complaining, “Woe is me.” Yes, that is me whining some days and perhaps you, too. Many of us think that if we didn’t have hardship, we would be truly happy. Not so. Your life is meant to be rewarding, happy, meaningful and challenging. A meaningful life isn’t just handed to you all at once. It comes as you develop resilience. Resilience refers to your ability to cope with, adapt to and rise above hardship and crisis.ARTArticleTime to DisconnectMy email is down today. I am angry and frustrated. In a little less than a month, I will be on a vacation. I am excited beyond words that I will not be able to access my email. Wait a minute, how can both be true? I am slightly addicted to email. I check it constantly. It is a way for me to connect with friends, family, colleagues and clients. I want to make sure that I am available for people who need me. I want to be able to connect with those that I care about. I love being able to completely disconnect from everyone.ARTArticleTips for Widows--Surviving The HolidaysHolidays can be difficult for widows. Whether it is a birthday, anniversary, Thanksgiving or New Years, the memories of past holidays can keep widows stuck in the past and unable to move forward in their life. It can feel impossible to even consider participating in a holiday without one's spouse. Those shared traditions and memories from past years probably do not feel appropriate now. Sometimes widows feel guilty when they think about participating in special days without their spouse.

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