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ARTArticleVictim, Survivor or Thriver? How They Are Different and What You Can Do To Move On.Each experience is telling us something about ourselves, other people, the society we live in, the country, the world. The messages we receive from our experience are filtered through our belief system, previous experience and cultural norms. For example, one person may see adversity as something they will never recover from, someone else takes difficulties and hard knocks as opportunities to review what they are doing and make a fresh start. How you deal with a difficult life challenge, how it changes you, who you become, what you learn from it - are entirely yours to choose.ARTArticleWhy do I keep getting stuck in the same unhealthy relationship patterns? 5 reasons we may be harming our love lifeMost of us can probably say that we’ve dated a “type.” I often hear people reveal that they’ve managed to find a significant other that is emotionally unavailable, clingy, insensitive, too sensitive, defensive, etc, etc, etc. In truth, most relationships involve some level of incongruence between partners, but in heathy relationships those ups and downs are less like a roller coaster and more like sail boat. What kind of relationship are you in? What kind of relationship would you like to be in? Below are 5 reasons we get stuck in our unhealthy relationship patterns:ARTArticleWhy Empaths And Sensitives Must Take Special Care Of Their EnergiesA finely tuned perception is one of the main characteristic of empaths and sensitives. They pick up on very subtle non-verbal clues, feeling the energy and emotions of others, even if they are not obviously displayed. Body language, facial expressions or simply the energy of a person are enough to perceive what is really going on. Sensitives notice when someone is inauthentic and are not easily fooled by outward appearances.ARTArticleWhy Memories Remain Painful Even After Long Time And How To Loosen The Hold Of The PastWhy Memories hurt. When an experience is recorded as a memory, it goes through the emotional and cognitive filters, assumptions and interpretations of the person. This is one of the reasons why different people can have quite different recollections of an event they all witnessed.ARTArticleWhy Memories Remain Painful Even After Long Time And How To Loosen The Hold Of The PastWhy Memories hurt. When an experience is recorded as a memory, it goes through the emotional and cognitive filters, assumptions and interpretations of the person. This is one of the reasons why different people can have quite different recollections of an event they all witnessed.ARTArticleWhy You Need A Strong Sense of Self And How To Boost It.When life is busy or challenging, most people get so caught up in what goes on in their head that they forget all about the rest of their body. But problems and difficulties are best addressed with the whole of you. If you focus on your issues with a strong sense of self - rather than only your mind - your confidence and inner compass have a solid base for operating in the world. This is enhanced by being fully present in the here and now - rather than dwelling on the past or projecting thoughts into the future.ARTArticleWhy You Need to Cultivate Self-LoveSelf-love - really? Isn’t it conceited, selfish, unpleasant, arrogant, narcissistic, vain and full of false pride? It is, if ego-based and full of self-importance. However, there is a different kind of self-love you really need. The right kind of Self-Love.r ARTArticleWill not be a victim3 September of 2015 I got married to a wonderful lady. I admit, I have been married before, so this shouldn’t be any different. Yet, this was different. My now wife and I had been dating for five years. Our dating consisted of being together roughly two months over the course of the year.r ARTArticle***Challenging the Expectation of Failure in Addiction RecoveryChallenging the Expectation of Failure History is helpful to us in many ways. We can learn from what hasn’t worked as we continue to pursue solutions, for example. Our ‘failures’ can point us in new directions if we use them as ‘research’ rather than reasons to stagnate or give up. Like Edison said before finding his famous solution: I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. That’s a good lesson for addiction treatment and recovery. That we need to keep looking has been clear for a very long time. The Concept of Failure in Recovery ARTArticle***Prescription Drug Use and Psychological DependenceThe Deep Attachment of Psychological Dependence with Prescription Drug Use ARTArticleBetter, More Engaging Therapy? Sign Me Up!It seems that everything is getting easier in this technological age. There are apps to help us eat better, walk more and even do a little bit of yoga on the go. We can even keep our bodies strong by staying active and paying more attention to the nutritional benefits that we derive from every attempt that we can make to maintain a healthy lifestyle.ARTArticleCan Anger Management Work for Everyone?Is anger management really effective? That is a question asked by many with fairly limited information to support a non-subjective answer. Yes, there are numerous studies on anger management where the research has been published in a scientific jou als and reviewed by peers. Most of these reports have looked at segments of our culture that are incarcerated or who have committed violent crimes.ARTArticleCan Hypnosis Really Stop Me Smoking For Life?You may have been smoking for years but hypnosis really can stop you smoking for life. Many people who have unsuccessfully tried other methods of giving up smoking are naturally sceptical about the effectiveness of hypnosis to stop smoking. I don’t blame you. If you’ve tried other smoking cessation approaches and still found yourself reaching for a packet of cigarettes, you will know that it’s not an easy habit to quit. So what makes hypnosis effective, where other stop smoking methods fail? Read on to find out how this treatment works and whether it’s right for you.ARTArticleCoping With Christmas: Is It All Too Much?Christmas can be a stressful time of year for many people. It can put a strain on relationships, bring old grudges and problems to the fore, and also be a very sad and lonely time for some people. With the expectation that you should be enjoying yourself with friends and family, the expense of gifts and nights out, and the huge amount of work it takes to create a wonderful Christmas for your nearest and dearest, it’s no wonder that many people feel overwhelmed.ARTArticleFighting for My Mental Health: Battling My Insurance Company for CoverageI have struggled with depression my entire life. Before I even knew what mental illness was, back in a time when it was the gorilla in the room that nobody talked about, I knew something was different within myself. Off. Wrong. Unlike many people suffering from depression that can pinpoint a specific period in their life that marked the onset of their illness, mine seemed to always be present, lingering and lurking in the shadows for as long as I could remember.ARTArticleHigh RiskMy school’s counseling service is pushed to the back and most depressing corner of the student health center. I find myself there, quite unamused by the set up. I decide that after this first, mandatory meeting, I will never come back. Therapy is overrated; even if I am labeled completely screwed up today, I figure I will talk to the doc, get some happy pills, and go on my merry way. Just like all the other screwed up people in this screwed up world. I’ve abandoned my screwed-up-ness before, and I usually resume my state of nothingness soon after an “episode”.ARTArticleHow Can I Communicate Better With My Partner?Relationships between two people don't exist in isolation. Past experiences, personal history and expectations all influence a relationship, and often the way we communicate in our relationships is as a result of our past. If you’re one of the many people who feel that you and your partner do not communicate properly, this post is for you. Here I explore how to open the lines of communication, especially if the relationship is suffering, and help build a stronger union.ARTArticleHow strong are you?Strength comes in many forms. It can come by having pure physical strength. A 180 pound man, lifting 225 pounds above his head would be considered strong. A different type of strength would be a person with stamina. Another 180 pound man, can lift five pounds over his head, yet he can run a marathon in under three hours… then turn around and run five more miles the next day. A different type of strength but still very strong.ARTArticleI Don't Have To Write This“I just have to get this article done tonight.” The world might come to an end if I don’t. No one ever told me I had to get it done. The sad part is I may not get it done on time because I had to go to town to get new shoelaces. Do you get my sarcasm and the utter distaste for words like “have” and “had”? We don’t have to do anything. And the reality is I never had to write any updates for any site or anybody. I do things because I want to, not because I have too.ARTArticleIs Drug and Alcohol Addiction HereditaryMany people who have suffered from addiction or have a loved one who does, will likely, one time or another, question whether drug and alcohol addiction are hereditary. It’s an understandable conce for anyone interested in ending addiction. People want to know if their behavior, or that of their loved ones, suggests that other family members may be at risk of developing an addiction as well. Scientists have done a lot of research on addiction and genetics. Read on to learn about the results they have found. Family History of Drug and Alcohol Addictionr ARTArticleMental Illness and Mental Institutions: When You Have No More OptionsMy mom anxiously sits beside me on one of the faded blue couches. Today is the first day of final exams, I remember. But here I am, sitting and crying uncontrollably in the waiting room of my school’s counseling services. I am not the normal college student anymore. I am going insane.r ARTArticleMisdiagnosed With Depression: A Circuitous Journey to BipolarToday marks my first ever meeting with a psychiatrist. A good ole crazy people doctor for good ole crazy me. The psychiatrist turns out to be a sweet, bubbly, round-faced young woman who looks more like a favorite elementary school teacher than a psychiatrist, but in a good way. I like her immediately. Finally, someone normal. Side note: I get the whole psychiatrist thing. Decent money, and you get to learn about crazy people brains. Way more satisfying than being a therapist, if you ask me. I could do it, if, ya know, I don’t die first.ARTArticleMisdiagnosed With Depression: Manic AttackDecember 2016 Screaming. Excruciatingly desperate. Dangerously loud. Pain expressed with every sound; helplessness released with every breath. I sit up in my bed, surrounded by darkness. The sun starts peeking between the curtains of the bedroom. I look around, trying to figure out where the damn screeching is coming from. I was perfectly content pretending I was dead. Sleep is the only thing that relaxes me now. The only thing I crave within my aimless, and honestly pathetic, existence. But this stupid bawling freak ruined everything.ARTArticleMisdiagnosed With Depression: Panic AttacksI do not know what is happening to me. I have never felt this out of control before. I guess I have been broken, and now there’s nothing else but insanity pouring of me. Everyday I wake up with arms and legs made of bricks, and a bowling ball for a head. I skip one, two, all of my classes, but I cannot sleep for more than an hour at a time. I wake up in an impossibly debilitating panic: my heart beats out of my chest, my hands shake a million miles an hour, my stomach clenches into a microscopic knot, tears waterfall down my face.ARTArticleMisdiagnosed With Depression: Panic Attacks Part 2I am one month into my antidepressants when my psychiatrist tells me she has not seen any improvement in my “condition.” She doubles my dose of Prozac to 40mg, which, by the way, induces a hell of a lot of serotonin into one little tiny depressed body. I glare at her. I’m pissed that I’m not fixed yet. I’m pissed that she hasn’t fixed me yet. I stomp out of her office, like a little kid, and head to the bar, like a big kid. My friend and I each order a pitcher of hard cider, and I try my best to drink away my anger. My impatience. My frustration. My resentment. And, secretly, my fear.ARTArticleMy First Psychiatric Institution: Meet the CraziesDecember 2016 This institution looks nothing like the movies. It’s set up like a little home, comfy cozy, except everything is confined to one huge room, so they can watch us. There’s a receptionist desk, where the lady who checked me in now sits. She switches between scrolling on her computer and scanning us crazies.r ARTArticleReclaiming That Little Lost BoyMy favourite recovery author is John Bradshaw. He is the one who introduced me to the idea of the inner child. And he also helped me understand that alcoholism is never a primary illness, but rather it is a secondary disease. Bradshaw believes that the primary illness is co-dependency or as he says "the disease of the disease." When I quit drinking I had a fear of not only going to jail but also ending up divorced. And at first this was the reaso I quit drinking. But as time went on and I became a regular at AA meetings I slowly began feeling good about the direction my life was going.ARTArticleThe Dark SideWe all have a dark side and we are masters at hiding it. We all have traits within us that we don’t like. Usually we choose not to look too closely or we practice complete denial. It’s not at all easy to get real with ourselves. I found there are two types of people in the world, those who want to know and those who want to believe. People don’t want to hear the truth because they don’t want their illusions destroyed. Interesting, isn’t it? You can see it if you look at the people in your life. Do you know into which category you fall?ARTArticleThe Do's and Dont's of CancerCancer. A word that no one wants to hear or say. A word which even in this modern time conjures up thoughts of death. The surgeries, the chemo, the radiation, at times, you wonder will it ever stop. And at times, you wonder, how much fight the both of you have. But, somehow, by the Grace of God, you work your way through it all, and as a couple, you become stronger. Along the way, you learn some valuable lessons. There are some "do's" and "don'ts" which should be practiced, as a family with cancer, or as friends of a family with cancer.ARTArticleThe Gift of Mindful PresenceThere was a point when I noticed that everyone in my life seemed to talk a lot while I listened. I wasn’t a talker. I was pretty young; maybe my early 20s and I didn’t know things other people knew…like women talk more than men in general. Men think differently about sex than women. There are chick flicks. I could go on………. You could say that I didn’t know much of anything about the world! I was really naïve. However, I began to watch people. I thought that maybe something was wrong with me and I needed to talk more to be normal.

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