Browse Intimacy

“Wow- I thought you two were Newlyweds!” How often do you and your mate hear this? If you’re like most of us, probably not very often, (unless you are, of course, newly wed). But what would it be like to have that ‘spark’ again?

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The Twilight Fervor The Twilight fervor seems to be heating up again with the release of the next movie in the Twilight saga. What isn't being talked about though is its potentially negative effects on relationships. After seeing this disturbing Twilight parody music video, and hearing about "Twilight Moms" and such on Oprah, it seemed necessary to comment on the Twilight phenomenon, and it's detrimental effects on marriages.

Published · 8,441 views · Rated 1/5 from 1 votes

Have you ever heard of a dog that gives you the middle finger, snubs you when you call, believes that you exist to please her and that she doesn’t have to please you (unless she feels like it)—and channels the worst parts of your mother to boot? A dog that intentionally tries to trip you when ...

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Q: I've heard therapists say that a male adult who sexually abuses a boy isn't necessarily ‘homosexual.' This seems confusing: If he isn't homosexual, then why would he sexually molest boys, instead of girls? A: This is a very good question, and there are several ways to respond to it. First, ...

Published · 4,206 views · Rated 5/5 from 1 votes

The mechanics of “having sex” are fairly simple, but really “making love” and developing a good intimate relationship takes some time and effort. Movies, pornography and other media tell us that sex is–or should be–easy, which is a set up for problems in a real relationship. For those who have ingested pornography, it’s difficult to have a healthy and accurate perspective of sexuality, and to separate fantasy from reality. Pornography–The Sex Mis-educator

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Gay male couples feel a lot of pressure to remain sexually fresh, new, and exciting. That’s the popular stereotype. “All gay men love sex and have it a lot” trumpets the popular press. “If I were gay,” straight men joke, “I would be having sex all the time with my partner! Guys always want it!” ...

Published · 4,360 views · Rated 5/5 from 1 votes

Lately the New Warrior Adventure--sponsored by the Mankind Project (MKP)--has been getting some negative press. The false belief that is being written is that it promotes reparative therapy and helps gay men turn straight. This is the promise given by some reparative therapy groups and ...

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When a couple enters therapy and one partner exhibits sexually addictive behaviors, the non-addicted partner (co-addict) often asks me to “Fix my partner!” Both believe that their only problem is how his/her sexual acting out (SAO) impairs their relationship. With all couples, however, I ...

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This empowering book provides 10 positive steps gay men can take to identify and overcome self-defeating behaviors and move toward a healthier and more rewarding life. These steps have proved invaluable to the hundreds of gay men Joe Kort has helped in his 16 years of individual, couples, and ...This empowering book provides 10 positive steps gay men can take to identify and overcome self-defeating behaviors and move toward a healthier and more rewarding life.

Published · 8,359 views · Rated 3/5 from 1 votes

A while back a guy friend came up to me at church and said he had some receipts for me to reimburse. I looked at him like “What are you talking about?” and he said, “You know…babysitting receipts. You said you’d cover the babysitting if I’d start taking my wife out on dates.” I laughed and said “Okay. Sure.”

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I’m sorry mama! I never meant to hurt you! I never meant to make you cry but tonight I’m cleaning out my closet. n—lyrics to Eminem’s “Cleaning Out My Closet (I’m Sorry, Mama)” Eminem went where no son has publicly gone before—or is allowed to go—in attacking his mother. In this society, it is ...

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Sexual intimacy is as important for the health and vitality of the marriage relationship as is emotional closeness and spiritual connection. Sexual nourishment that feeds both husband and wife is the dessert of married life. Strengthening your marriage intimately--emotionally, spiritually and sexually--is one of the most important efforts in which you can put your time and energy. So-called desire discrepancies between husband and wife can be a thing of the past, as couples come to understand the intricacies of intimacy and mutual sexual fulfillment.

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The term MSM (men who have sex with men)derives from the growing body of literature showing evidence that not all men who have sex with men - even obligatory homosexual sex - are gay. It's struck such a chord that even Oprah addressed the trend when she interviewed J.L. King who originally ...

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How have you answered that most perplexing and essential question in our lives, “Who am I?” I found my answer by thinking of my heart as my essence. My heart is love and the feelings and behaviors associated with it are warm and peaceful. Being connected to my heart I feel a oneness and connection to everything and everyone around me. Living in integrity with my true self feels great. When I stay connected to my heart in the face of difficulties, I feel like my own hero.

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Passion is energizing and inspiring, a great big wonderful “YES!” that fills life with a sense of greatness and purpose. When you have passion, life is fun and juicy. In relationship, passion is a deeply affirmative force. When there’s passion--for one another, for spending time together, for ...

Published · 6,652 views · Rated 4.3/5 from 7 votes

There is a widespread idea in the self-development and spiritual communities that you should focus only on what you want to create and turn your attention away from the obstacles. I was reading The Science of Getting Rich by Wallace Wattles which is really a brilliant book published in 1910. He mentions that you should focus your unwavering thoughts on what you want to create and let the challenges and negative things become obsolete and disappear by themselves. This is something to be very careful about.

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I came to realize that talking about femininity really triggered many women's defenses. This really wasn't my intention. My intention is to empower you so that you can live the way you truly desire. I came to realize that there are lots of ideas and stigmas related to femininity which distort the message. To rectify this miscommunication, let's talk about the unshakable power of femininity.

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Meditation entails any practice used to quiet one’s mind thus enabling the practitioner to focus on the present moment. Physical activities including yoga, walking, running, sewing, cooking, etc. may focus the mind and empty it of extraneous thoughts. Less physical activities including observance of the breath, mantra meditation (the continuous chanting of a sacred sound or phrase), and guided meditation (following auditory or visual prompts) are also vehicles known to shift brain activity from a stress prone state to a measurably calmer state of being.

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The “I” s of intimacy (a.k.a interruptions) abundantly threaten relationships on a regular basis. Naturally occurring “I”s can’t be avoided no matter how much an individual or couple may try. Such is life. Many “I”s are obvious to all parties involved while some remain hidden to self as well as others. * Illness * Injury * Irritation * Immobility * Interference

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There is currently a class war between the workers and the ultra-rich, and the rich are winning. That's unfortunate, because this is not sustainable for anyone. Money, which is nothing more than a piece of paper representing an agreement and a contract, is losing its stability. Investors are moving their wealth into real assets such as gold, metals, food, rice, cafe and everything that has real value. As a consequence, the price of all the commodities is going up. Inflation is going up until people can't buy what they need for survival.

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A few people asked me whether animal magnetism (also known as sexual magnetism) is good or evil. Someone wrote in an article that “animal magnetism is evil and manipulative, and also that the person with animal magnetism steals the other person's life-force in the process". Let's explore the issue.

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I finally wrote down the methodology I have intuitively been using over the years to achieve concrete results by changing from within. Spirituality is getting very popular since the last ten years yet many people still don’t achieve their goals. A very popular meditation technique is to breathe to reach stillness, yet you could breathe in such a way your entire life and still remain virgin and penny-less. At least you’d feel better about being broke! There has to be some way to achieve more concrete results with spirituality, and there is.

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A lot of peoople want magic pills to solve all their problems. They often end up frustrated. Some are willing to put more efforts to get deeper results. Lasting exte al changes come from within. Those who decide to clear their emotional limitations to transform their life from the inside out usually go through a process. According to the people I've seen, here's the process they usually go through.

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I get computer programming job offers every week, which pay 80000$/year as salary or 100000$/year as independent contractual worker. I thought it was because of my extensive programming experience and expertise, but there might be more to it. One of my coaching clients got 3 job interviews the week after we worked together on solving a feeling of unworthiness. Another coaching client just got several job offers. Guess what? Now they can afford coaching!

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A comment from a woman: "I'm all for having sex, no question about that. But I'm also about it happening for reasons that don't include 'not caring' or 'giving value' to someone else. Most of your information is a lot classier & better put together than this." It brings up the question. How to you conciliate the Buddhist philosophy of detachment with the philosophy of living from the heart? What do both these philosophies mean anyway?

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The pop phrase “Location, Location, Location” is commonly associated with real estate. It connotes the three key factors in determining the desirability of a property: location, location, and location. When it comes to female orgasm, however, the cliché “location, location, location” is possibly even more important than in real estate circles. A dysfunctional orgasm may be due to a variety of causes including: aging female apparatus, hormonal fluctuations, shrinking clitoris, medication that inhibits sexual response, or simply a partner with poor aim.

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Many people, especially in the academic world, look at the world in a very rational way. They view everything related to energies and spirituality with skepticism, a rational skepticism. People involved in groups often seek approval and recognition. For example, Wikipedia wants to be recognized as a legit encyclopedia. The Zeitgeist Movement wants to be taken seriously by the medias and mainstream population.

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The violet flame is a meditation that allows healing by transmuting energies. It is well-known by people practicing Yoga and Alchemy and has been made famous by Saint Germain. Here's an in-depth explanation of what the violet flame meditation is and how to make it more effective.

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What makes a person sexually attractive? Some guys with almost perfect bodies can't get girls while other men who who don't have the looks are surrounded by women. Let's talk about 7 main aspects that make a person attractive. 1. Boldness. Some people do whatever they want no matter what people think. They say what passes on their mind directly. They may go sit down with random girls. They dress the way they like. They may have a touch of goofiness but they respect people. This fearlessness is very inspiring and attractive. Who doesn't want that freedom?

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I was reading David Deida's book The Way of the Superior Man and he was saying that masculinity seeks freedom and femininity seeks love. Later I was doing Natural Grounding. Then BANG it hit it like a brick on the head! Actually it was my hands that made the sound on my forehead. Masculinity is to follow a life purpose. Femininity is to fully live the present moment.

Published · 2,584 views · Rated 4/5 from 1 votes

Animal magnetism refers to a person's sexual attractiveness or authentic charisma. Simply put, the better a person feels about himself, the better people feel around him, which creates a magnetic presence. The controversy with science is about whether this is due to body language, voice tone and language or whether there is an level of communication that goes beyond body language through a magnetic fluid. Science tends to view humans as isolated systems, to which the empirical law of conservation of energy applies.

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Finding a mate is one of the most fundamental aspects of life, but it is also a problem many people struggle with. Here are the ten biggest mistakes men make with women. Mistake #1: Pursuing women. Most guys will try all kind of things to get women, such as subtly hanging around a cute girl, walking across the bar to talk to a hot girl, trying to be funny and interesting enough to keep a girl's attention, trying to get a girl's phone number, or simply wishing to be with the girl next to them.

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You are learning about seduction… but what is seduction? It is not about seducing women, it is about living a seducing life. It is about seducing yourself, seducing life, seducing friends, seducing strangers, seducing customers, seducing allies, seducing enemies — and seducing women. How can you seduce a woman if you can’t seduce yourself? How can a woman fall in love with you if you haven’t fallen in love with life?

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Lack or breakdown of communication is the primary reasons marriages fail. Couples have to learn to talk and listen to each other if they desire a solid marriage. Communication, most especially verbal is what makes us different from other animals and that is the foundation of all human relationship. Two people cannot walk together except they agree and they can't agree except they TALK. No marriage can be right if the parties involves have not mastered the act of communication. Communication can either be:

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"Can two walk together except they agree?" Amos 3:3 Openness abhors secrecy, unfaithfulness or infidelity. Effective communication makes openness possible. Two cannot agree except they communicate. You must be ready to speak to your partner without lies and deceit.

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A whole lots of people are having problems in their marriage today because they allow barriers in their openness to their spouses,here let us check some of the barriers you must remove to give room for open ness in your marriage.

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"Let my beloved come into his garden, and eat his pleasant fruits." SOS 4:16b The way your man sees sex, is quite different from your perception of sex. It means much more to your husband than to you. He is passionate about it and might even be "crazy" about it. Sex affects the way every man reasons. Once you understand the importance of sex to your man, I am sure you will be able to go all out to satisfy him.

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According to a Dictionary intimacy is defined as, "showing a close union or combination of particles or elements: an intimate mixture." Being intimate involves the mixing of our life with another's, a mingling of souls, a sharing of hearts. This is something we all long for because it's how God made us. We were designed to connect. Real Intimacy is More Than Sex Maybe you are wondering about sex. Assuredly, sex is a part of intimate expression, but it is not intimacy. Sex is a basic level of physically connecting to another person, but intimacy is a deeper connection.

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It is easy for people to throw caution into the wind after weeding, disrespecting their spouses, removing courtesy hurting each other deeply. Many wrong things we cannot do to outsiders are what we do to our spouses, this is totally wrong. To have intimacy in your marriage, to enjoy sizzling and intimate relationship with your spouse politeness is the key. To show that we are polite to our spouse and spark up intimacy in our marriage, thereby enjoying the miracle of politeness in our homes, we must do the following:

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Many couples lack some basic courtesies needed to build intimacy in marriage. Rudeness, careless words, disrespect for one's spouse, criticisms, public embarrassment do not portray politeness. Before the wedding, most singles ensure they are courteous as they put their partner ahead of their desires. They are consumed by the passion to make their intended spouse feel good about them. Once the ceremony is over, courtesy dwindles until mutual honour and respect is annihilated.

Published · 2,475 views · Rated 5/5 from 1 votes

One key to marriage success was exposed in the Bible by King Solomon long time ago; but most modern couples are ignoring it or they are not aware of it. Let’s check it out first before I comment on it. "I am my beloved’s, and his desire is toward me. Come, my beloved, let us go forth into the field; let us lodge in the villages. Let us get up early to the vineyards; let us see if the vine flourish, whether the tender grape appear, and the pomegranates bud forth: there will I give thee my loves"(Song of Solomon 7:10-12 KJV)

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To make our marriage better and enjoy intimacy in our marriage,one important thing we need to know about ourselves and our partners is to understand our sexual desires, how we are sexually wired, the way we act and do what we do. Why some want sex often, others don't. This may have to do with our sex grouping. This will go a long way to affect the way we see and take sex and the way we relate to our spouses.

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One thing that is lacking in many marriages that makes it difficult for many is transparency. Many people in marriage are simply not open to each other, this gives to lots of crisis and conflict in the family, if your home must be joyful, peaceful and blissful you and your partner must be open to each other, not giving room for doubt, distrust and suspicion. You must live a life of total openness without, " dark rooms" " skeleton" in your cupboard, nothing to hide everything is on the table.

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During an extensive marriage seminar; the speaker emphasized on the fact that intimacy is the bedrock of romance in any marriage. He did his best to convince everyone in attendance to nurture intimacy in their homes. As Jude and his wife sat listening with rapt attention to the speaker, they thought on the state of their marriage and oblivious of each other’s conclusion, their views were contrasting.

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Family Constellation therapy or better said Family Constellation work (as it is properly named) is a therapeutic process that was developed in the second half of the 20st century, by a man named Bert Hellinger.

Published · 1,370 views · Rated 4/5 from 1 votes

When a Constellation is “set up,” we always try to start as small as possible. After you state your issue to the group, which generally consists of 15-20 people, I then check in with you about how you are doing. When you are ready, I tell you who needs to be represented in your Constellation. We need someone to represent you, someone to represent your father, and someone to represent your mother. In a Constellation, other people from the group are asked to represent the members of your family or the parts that are needed in a Constellation.

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We are living in extraordinary times right now and are all asked to step up and surrender at the same time. I have to be honest with you today. We are all struggling right now big time. I am in it too. Why is that and why is it important for you to know this and read this message?

Published · 1,393 views · Rated 4/5 from 1 votes

Ever heard of ‘bibliotherapy?’ I’ve been a practitioner for years, but I never heard this fancy word until recently. Bibliotherapy is an academic term used to describe the amazingly beneficial (and very delightful!) mind/body reactions that occur from reading erotic romantic literature. In fact, sex therapists are advising their female patients to get busy and start reading erotic romance! YAY!

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10 simple things to spark that desire and set your love life on fire again! After many years of being in a committed relationship, both people very busy, kids running around, family obligations, and possibly even two careers and a household to manage, it’s not shocking that intimacy would be the last thing on someone's mind.

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Free your mind from the false beliefs about what beauty is to become a healthier, happier you. Body Liberator – someone who teaches people how to release the feelings of negativity, bondage and/or captivity they feel about their body. Simply stated, I help people with a poor body image learn to appreciate who they are right now by getting reacquainted and back in-touch with their true essence. After all, beyond your physical self, your essence is what you truly emanate to the world.

Published · 1,806 views · Rated 4/5 from 1 votes

Today one of my clients asked how she could cut her cord: Here is my answer to her question: I dreamed last year that I needed to cut my cord in order to be happy here with my children and my husband. (As you know, all of my family is in Germany and I am the only one here in the States) I had no idea what it would look like. I kept holding onto an intention: a curiosity to find out what cutting my cord in a healthy way would look like.

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Why is it important to your own growth and peace of mind that you are ok with where you are? Being OK with where you are accomplishes two things. First of all, it gives you a clear picture of where you are. Second, it gives you piece of mind, and an honest foundation from which you can start healing your early sexual trauma. When you are honest with yourself, you have a solid base to start from. It gives you a starting point from which you can begin to trust yourself.

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No it’s not Valentines yet. I was invited to speak on a radio show just a few days ago. On air we talked a lot about trauma, how it happens, and what to do about it. We talked about how trauma is such a taboo in our society, yet it is everywhere and a lot of people think that being abused is a part of life. We asked the question, “Why is it that people stay in relationships that aren’t good for them and why is it that they choose to be treated badly over being alone?” The answer that I have come to is that it is all about love.

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How do these three words pertain to personal growth and a woman’s healing journey? Yesterday was Thanksgiving Day and, as the name suggests, we all should pause on that day and reflect on what we are grateful for. Not just reflect, but to truly feel the gratitude in our deepest core.

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In the Western World, trauma is mostly seen as psychological impact but there is actually a different view on trauma that not many people do not know about or understand. One of the most common approaches to healing trauma is to have someone to talk to so that you can be heard and feel understood and supported. That is very important because it can make you feel better and enable you to move on, however, it does not clear out your trauma.

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I have two small children, a husband, a household and my work. I do want to connect with Source (or whatever you call that higher part that governs the Universe) and I do want to be the best I can be. I do want to be enlightened. Many spiritual teachers suggest that a true state of divine connectedness can only be attained through stilling your mind, sitting quietly and by detachment from the world. Well, that has not been working for me. And I am pretty sure it hasn’t been working for you, either. So I started questioning this paradigm.

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If you are anything like me, you probably have done a lot of “healing” work on your self. A few years ago, I was introduced to the concept of “integration”. I was invited to think in terms of integration instead of in terms of healing. It made a lot of sense to me, and brought profound changes in my life. I will share with you in this article how and why you can benefit from this mind shift. Healing connotes that there is something that needs fixing, and that something is wrong with you.

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In my “toilet moment”,the moment that was my wake up call, I realized I wasn’t very far from death.

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In a perfect world, my husband and I are alone at a romantic resort, where we get couples massages, candlelight dinners al fresco, breakfast in bed, dancing under the stars, and lots of undisturbed nookie time. Here’s the reality – two busy careers, two busy kids, too busy and broke for anything, let alone a romantic getaway. What’s that quote about necessity being the mother of invention? Well, DH (darling husband!) and I came up with a fabulous solution to our time and money challenge for romance.

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You might have heard somebody tell you recently: “Don’t shoot the messenger”. The sentence has become kind of a catch phrase, but what does it really mean? In short, it means that you shouldn’t react. That when something is “triggering” you, upsetting you, you shouldn’t act out or lose it. This is easier said then done (as we all know!) This article will take a look at how you can stop yourself from reacting, and how you can create more peace in your life (Stop shooting the messenger). It all has to do with your response-ability It all has to do with your response-ability.

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Most Men do hurt their Wives in the name of correcting them. They speak harshly; they are so rash in their approach and can be very brutal. Lots of women are living their lives in bitte ess and anger due to the careless ways their husbands have been talking to them over time. Here you will be able to know the right ways to talk to your wife without hurting her: 1) LOWER YOUR VOICE: Don’t shout at her, she is not your housemaid, she is not a Child. You can correct, yes, but why shouting?r

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Your wife can be dying in silence why still performing her wifely duties, you will need to know her to know when she needs to be fixed. When a woman is always moody, cries a lot, yell on Children, can easily sleep or sleep a lot, she may be with battling something you are not careful enough to see. A real man will not allow his wife to fall apart without fixing her and make her better and happy. If you discover your wife is falling apart, it is often due the following: 1. CHECK IF YOU ARE THE PROBLEMr

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When Marriage hurts, there is a high possibility of making mistakes that will make the matter worse. 9 THINGS YOU MUST NOT DO WHEN YOU ARE TIRED OF YOUR MARRIAGE Emotion is high, depression is setting in, anger is deep and worry is overwhelming, that is the period when people make more terrible mistakes, saying terrible things, do negative things, hurt themselves and their loved ones.9 THINGS YOU MUST NOT DO WHEN YOU ARE TIRED OF YOUR MARRIAGE Here are things you must never do, when your marriage is really hurting:

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The Four C’s of Emotional Intimacy Emotional intimacy is a deep bond between a husband and wife that is occasionally defined as a soulmate connection. Along with spiritual, intellectual, and sexual intimacy, emotional intimacy is one of the building blocks upon which great marriages are ...

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The answer should be an unconditional, “yes!” But you may not know that, because you don't love yourself, or you may answer yes, but still find yourself having great difficulties finding love or keeping love alive. Instead of truly being open to being loved, you may be feeling like the only way you can feel good about yourself is if someone loves you. If this is the case, you are suffering from a lack of nurturing during your childhood. You are really looking for a nurturing parent, because you lacked one as a child.

Published · 2,472 views · Rated 4.3/5 from 3 votes

One of the biggest problems in relationships is the lack of a true connection. What is a true connection? It is a desire to be with someone, because you want to share yourself with them and you want them to share themselves with you, too. A true connection is what intimacy is all about. The experience of sharing is so gratifying that you look forward to being with each other.

Published · 6,475 views · Rated 3.7/5 from 3 votes

When you truly love yourself, you easily meet all of your needs. You take care of your physical needs. You take care of your safety and security needs. You take care of your belonging and acceptance needs. You take care of your self-esteem needs, and you take care of all of your needs to realize your full-potential in life. Imagine for a moment that you feel great, that you have no worries about finances, that you feel loved and loving, that you have only positive beliefs about yourself, and that you are living your life on purpose.

Published · 2,771 views · Rated 3/5 from 1 votes

When you feel anxious, you may not have a way to calm down, and you may be terrified that your anxiety will also trigger a panic attack. An overactive nervous system is causing your anxiety and panic attacks if you are experiencing them when you are truly safe. The reason you feel anxiety in safe situations, is because something you are seeing, hearing, smelling, or feeling in that moment reminds you of a past abuse, loss or trauma.

Published · 4,446 views · Rated 3.6/5 from 5 votes

If you are committed to finding true love or keeping your love relationship alive and well, you will need to overcome your fear of opening up so you can create true intimacy. Why is opening up so important? Relationships are based on the commonalities you have with your partner and your acceptance of any differences.

Published · 6,349 views · Rated 4/5 from 2 votes

I lost the parent lottery. My mother was verbally abusive and my father threatened my life for 18 years. I am one of the happiest people you will ever meet today, and I am excited to be telling you how you can transform your life too. You can have true love or find true love and success in everything you do in life, if you will give yourself permission to love yourself. Intimacy in all of your relationships is only possible if you love yourself.

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The biggest obstacle to intimacy is fear of rejection. If fear of rejection is blocking intimacy for you, then you may be feeling very lonely. I know you desire the deeply fulfilling experience of being close, but your fear of being rejected is too strong to allow you to open up and truly share yourself with a potential partner. Emotional intimacy may be a dream of yours, and that makes alot of sense. Sharing who you are, being seen and known by another, and sharing love and laughter together is soul satisfying.

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If you think intimacy means having a sexual relationship like most people do, then learning the true definition of intimacy will help you in all of your relationships. The very high percentage of failed relationships is due in large part to a lack of understanding of what true intimacy is. Intimacy is sharing your thoughts, feelings and needs with your friends, and also sharing your body with your partner. When you share your thoughts, your feelings, your needs and your body with your partner, hopefully, you are creating a warm, close and loving connection that will last forever.

Published · 1,993 views · Rated 4.2/5 from 17 votes

Loving yourself 100% is the best way to deal with life’s stresses. The stresses of the 21st century are now making this a goal we all must achieve. Why? Because stress is caused by the collision of the pressure to do something and negative beliefs we hold about ourselves. When you are overly stressed, your desire and ability to be intimate may be greatly affected. You may become over reactive to your partner or you may withdraw. In either case, you and your partner will suffer. It's time to reduce your emotional stress by falling madly in love with yourself.

Published · 4,092 views · Rated 4.3/5 from 3 votes

A great deal has been written about the damaging effects that anger can have on intimate relationships. But did you know that anger can be beneficial to your marriage or relationship? n The dark side of anger Like all emotions, anger runs along a continuum--from low to high intensity. When ...

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"I really hate it when we argue…but I've also learned so much about my husband from our fights and we have a stronger relationship now." ~Sandra, married seven years Even the most effective communicators get into spats now and then. And despite your best efforts at marital bliss, you and your partner will disagree and argue from time to time. But not all conflict is bad—conflict (if handled correctly) can teach you a great deal about yourself and your spouse or partner.

Published · 1,699 views · Rated 3.7/5 from 3 votes

Once an argument has been settled, it's human nature to tuck it away in the back of your mind so you never have to revisit it again. After all, why would you want to stir up all those negative feelings associated with the argument? It's easy to think that only a glutton for punishment would do ...

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A computer and access to the Internet: That’s all you need to share your opinion with the world about how you think people should manage their lives, relationships, finances…you name it. It seems like ove ight, everyone has become a potential "expert" about some particular ...

Published · 1,251 views · Rated 4/5 from 2 votes

Have you ever related to your spouse/partner in a totally non-defensive, emotionally open way? If you have, in that moment you and your spouse/partner were vulnerable and receptive to each other’s emotional needs/experiences. To do this, you were able to free yourself from the emotional blocks that so many men struggle with—you were unencumbered by the stereotypes and preconceived notions about masculinity that stand in the way of an authentic emotional connection. During moments of deep emotional intimacy there is no pretense or ego at work.

Published · 1,446 views · Rated 3/5 from 2 votes

If it's the season to be jolly… …then why am I seeing so many stressed, beleaguered couples walking around? Is it more apt to say, 'Tis the season to feel tense, frustrated and constantly on the go? Whether you're feeling totally overwhelmed or slightly frustrated, it's easy to lose perspective about what's most important and valuable to you during this holiday season--your marriage or relationship. What does the holiday season mean to you and your partner? Ironically, the gift of love can easily be forgotten this time of year.

Published · 1,129 views · Rated 3/5 from 5 votes

Q: "I'm getting married in a month and want to know why so many marriages end in divorce. What should I look out for? How can I prevent divorce?" ~Sandra, Houston TX A: Understanding why a marriage or relationship might fail can alert couples to their own unique relationship vulnerabilities. These are not meant to be doom-and-gloom predictions about anyone's marriage, but rather information to help you identify potential marriage problems that can arise and that should be addressed. Let's look at five reasons why a marriage or relationship might not survive.

Published · 2,130 views · Rated 3.3/5 from 3 votes

Here is my marriage advice to all couples: If you want to strengthen your marriage or relationship: Watch your mouth! Marriage help: It's all about the words we choose There's an old Bee Gees song that says, "It's only words, and words are all I have, to take your heart away." When you and your spouse/partner were first dating, you probably used your words wisely in an effort to win over your mate's heart.

Published · 1,352 views · Rated 3.4/5 from 5 votes

Why is it that we have no problem lounging around in our favorite sweatpants (with the hole in the knee) and our favorite threadbare T-shirt (with the rip in the sleeve) in front of our spouse/partner, but if our friends/co-workers were on the way over, we'd change into something "decent" in a quick hurry?

Published · 1,346 views · Rated 3.7/5 from 3 votes

Arguments are a regular part of Lindsey and Hector's relationship. During a recent couples counseling session, they volleyed insults back and forth with such intensity that I almost stopped the session. But then something remarkable happened: Lindsey said, "Our marriage is too important to me to go on like this. We shouldn't treat each other this way. I want us to be friends again." I waited for Hector to mock his wife's tired attempt to bring back the harmony they once shared. But to my surprise, he softened and agreed with Lindsey.

Published · 1,105 views · Rated 4/5 from 4 votes

When couples come to me for help, the first thing I do is observe how they communicate with each other. Communication is often the gauge of the health of a relationship. There are certain effective communication principles that can help you create a more harmonious marriage or relationship; and certain styles of communication have been linked to relationship and marital problems. When couples seek marriage help and relationship advice, they are often locked in ineffective communication patterns that have spiraled out of control.

Published · 1,351 views · Rated 4/5 from 4 votes

Q: "I need some marriage advice. Is arguing bad for a marriage? My husband says it's healthy to argue from time to time but I try to avoid marital conflict at all costs. Can you shed some light on this for us?" A: Relationship conflicts are a natural part of marriage or a long-term romantic relationship. And marital conflict isn't necessarily a sign that your relationship is in trouble.

Published · 1,270 views · Rated 3.7/5 from 3 votes

When you and your spouse/partner are locked in cycles of conflict, you probably assume you have nothing in common—especially during those times when your husband seems to shutdown emotionally and withdraw from you. However, the likelihood is that you and your mate share common threads in all that fighting—those commonalities are just going unrecognized.

Published · 2,143 views · Rated 2.8/5 from 5 votes

What is a fear of intimacy? The term "fear of intimacy" is often used to describe someone who has difficulty creating a close connection with their spouse/partner. Typically, the phrase highlights a person's struggle to become physically and/or emotionally close, and we often describe this struggle as a fear. But often there are certain differences between men and women that are misinterpreted as a fear of intimacy.

Published · 1,335 views

Couples often seek out my relationship help or marriage advice because of difficulties with intimacy—they no longer feel a deep emotional connection with their spouse/partner. Why are so many couples struggling with emotional intimacy? In order to experience the gifts of emotional intimacy, you need to share the deepest parts of yourself with your partner while maintaining a separate sense of self (without losing your identity).

Published · 2,880 views · Rated 4/5 from 3 votes

Any couples counselor will tell you that not all marriages or relationships are salvageable—despite my best efforts (and my pro-marriage and pro-commitment attitudes), some of the couples I've counseled will still make the painful decision to end their marriage or relationship. A sad fact is that there will always be a percentage of marriages that fail—despite the couple's best efforts to make it work. I think we all know this at some level, but we still believe that somehow our love is so unique and transcendent that our relationship will be the one that prevails, no matter what.

Published · 1,265 views · Rated 3.3/5 from 3 votes

Intimacy is the hallmark of a healthy marriage or relationship. But there may be powerful, unconscious forces at work that prevent you from developing a deep and meaningful connection with your partner. Many couples seek out marriage help, relationship advice and/or couples counseling because of ...

Published · 1,543 views · Rated 3.3/5 from 3 votes

I'm often asked, "What is one of the most challenging issues couples face today?" While every couple is different, there are themes that I see in my work as a couples counselor and relationship coach. One common issue is the difficulty couples have in prioritizing their relationship—a form of ...

Published · 1,405 views

What motivates someone to listen to another person? Understanding this question will help you work toward more effective listening in your own marriage or relationship. 1. Clear message, favorable outcome Clearly communicating your needs is the foundation of effective communication and a ...

Published · 2,325 views · Rated 3.7/5 from 6 votes

It's natural to enter a long-term relationship with expectations. And one expectation most of us have is that our spouse or partner will remain relatively healthy. Although wedding vows ask us to consider the possibility of sickness, we don't automatically assume our loved ones will suffer a ...

Published · 3,521 views

When a troubled couple comes to me for relationship help, one of the first questions I ask is, "What have you already done to try to solve these relationship problems?" Several issues immediately become apparent as I listen to these distressed couples: 1. Many of them didn't have a plan to ...

Published · 2,456 views

Anyone who is married or in a long-term committed relationship comes to realize that at some point there is a danger of falling into a lifeless routine.

Published · 1,305 views · Rated 3.5/5 from 4 votes

Anyone in a marriage or a long-term relationship understands the challenges of keeping romance and passion alive. Candlelit dinners, gazing into each other’s eyes, and the priority of talking and making love begin to buckle under the pressure of busy schedules, the demands of maintaining ...

Published · 1,399 views

You exist within a web of relationships. For instance, if your friend is going through tough times, you may find yourself feeling an emotional heaviness throughout the day, thinking and worrying about your friend. As this colors your mood, your partner may start to notice that lately you've been ...

Published · 1,169 views

Whether or not you consider yourself an "emotional" person, there's no doubt about it: emotions play a central role in your relationship and in building a deeper level of intimacy. When you share your feelings, you communicate directly about your needs and the deepest parts of yourself. ...

Published · 1,303 views

No one can deny the benefit of preventive medicine. First of all, it's often easier to prevent an illness than it is to cure it--that's why you go in for your annual physical (or why you should). And we all can agree that feeling healthy is preferable to feeling sick. So looking out for ...

Published · 1,036 views

You don't wake up one day and decide to have an affair. You're more likely to gradually enter into the arena of emotional infidelity—and many couples are surprised to discover that this slippery slope begins long before a physical affair is underway. Why is this? Someone starting an ...

Published · 4,098 views · Rated 3.5/5 from 2 votes

"I hate having to compete with the TV or computer for my husband's attention. He used to be such a wonderful listener. I feel like I'm not important enough to him anymore." ~Jennifer "It's really frustrating. I'll tell my girlfriend something and by the next day, she's forgotten what I said. ...

Published · 2,327 views

Couples often seek marriage counseling because of difficulties with intimacy. Why are so many couples struggling with intimacy? In order to fully connect with your spouse/partner, you need to share the deepest parts of yourself while maintaining a separate sense of self. This balancing act isn't ...

Published · 1,354 views

Two happily married couples, together for over fifteen years: "If I had to pick out one thing that has made the difference in our marriage, I guess it would be that he makes me laugh." ~Sarah "We just enjoy each other's company. We're playful and tease each other in a light-hearted way. Life ...

Published · 1,327 views

A recent marketing book I read touted the importance of getting potential clients to "know you, like you and trust you." It seems that marketing and romance have more in common than meets the eye: In the world of marketing you're trying to convince someone your product or service is worthwhile; ...

Published · 1,105 views

When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. ~Victor Frankln You don't need me to tell you about the dire state of the American economy and the reverberations being felt around the world. While you're probably well aware of how this is directly ...

Published · 1,253 views

"You never listen to me...I've asked you a thousand times to let me know when you can't pick the kids up from daycare!" In my work with couples, it is common to hear one person accuse the other of "not listening." This usually takes the following form: 1. You ask your partner to do something ...

Published · 1,362 views

In the past you were single…nn…and you could make decisions without having to check in with anyone. Your favorite color was red and you liked small, fast cars (as in Cherry Red Sports Car, beloved even though you wrenched your back getting in and out); The one bedroom apartment ...

Published · 2,319 views

Warning: the contents of this article may upset you. In fact, I strongly recommend that you close this page. If you're like most people, you have a child-like naïveté about romance. I don't want to spoil that. Sure, you were able to handle the truth about Santa Claus and the tooth ...

Published · 1,929 views

When it comes to love, men often get a bad rap. "You only hear about the guys who are abusive or cheat, but how about the tons of men who are faithful and kind?" ~John "I've been married for over twenty years. I know I'm not perfect, but I can honestly say that I do my best to be a good ...

Published · 1,509 views · Rated 4/5 from 2 votes

Q: I love my husband, but somewhere along the line we've become more like friends than lovers. We had an amazing sex life early in our relationship but now we're lucky if we have sex once a month, and when we do it's pretty unremarkable. I really enjoy sex and I'd like to make it a regular part ...

Published · 3,098 views

New love seems to cradle and carry couples for a time—magnifying all that is good about your partner and your future together. We now know that relationships go through a series of phases over the years—some that can challenge the very bond that holds you together. It's interesting ...

Published · 1,317 views

There are times when it's helpful to use compare and contrast thinking. For example, fifth-grade Social Studies. Remember when Mrs. Dogoody assigned the paper: "Compare and Contrast Ancient Roman and Ancient Greek Civilizations"? (I do; I still have the occasional nightmare about that one.) The ...

Published · 1,430 views

You often hear struggling athletes say that they have to "go back to basics." After years of repetition, it's easy to lose sight of the fundamentals they need to stay on top of their game. Often they need an outsider's perspective (i.e., a coach) to help them determine which fundamentals ...

Published · 1,301 views

Intimacy is a lot like trying to get warm on a cold winter night. You wrap yourself up in your favorite blankets and settle in for sleep, but at some point ove ight you may feel too warm and constrained by the blankets. So you disentangle yourself and push the blankets away. But after a few ...

Published · 3,979 views

A loving connection is the bedrock of a committed relationship—all couples are trying to find ways to remain emotionally close to one another as they navigate the complexities of life. When people feel deeply connected to their partners, they often describe feeling "complete," "whole" or ...

Published · 1,586 views

I bet if I asked you what you had for breakfast this morning, you'd have a concrete answer. (Even if the answer is "Black coffee" or "Didn't have time.") But how about if I ask you to recall something arguably more important than a single morning meal? Let's see how you fare: In what specific ...

Published · 1,042 views

Intimacy is all about connection--the feeling that you and your partner are kindred spirits. The hallmark of a healthy marriage or relationship is feeling close and attuned to your partner, but maintaining this connection isn't always easy. Therefore, finding ways to enhance intimacy is a ...

Published · 1,311 views

No matter how we might resist them at times, we can't deny the presence of rules in society. From traffic lights to ticket sales, rules help us avoid chaos and establish routines that allow us to cope as a society. But beyond the macrocosm, rules are an important presence in the microcosm of ...

Published · 2,825 views

Is life more manageable because of your partner? Do you ever feel upbeat and rejuvenated after spending time with your spouse? Does a reassuring word from your loved one bring you comfort and peace? Intimate relationships have the power to make you feel happier, energized and more alive. ...

Published · 919 views

No matter how well your relationship is humming along right now, there's room for the advice of relationship mentors. Couples who have been together for many years (and who have been relatively happy, despite the inevitable rough patches) have discovered what has benefited their relationship the ...

Published · 1,008 views

Think back to the time when your love was new, when you had just fallen in love: How did you know you were in love? Maybe you couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't concentrate on work or chores or anything that didn't involve your love object. Maybe you felt like a totally different person, ...

Published · 877 views

After the story broke that New York governor Eliot Spitzer was having sex with prostitutes, relationship experts popped up on every news channel, dispensing theories about Mr. Spitzer's behavior. Opinions about why a married man (and one with a great deal to lose) would behave this way ranged ...

Published · 1,626 views

You and your wife are settled in for the Mary Tyler Moore Show marathon with his and hers bags of microwave popco and caffeine-free diet Pepsi. Before Mary even gets in her first, "Oh, Mr. Grant!", the Passion Police bust down your door and handcuff you both. "You are hereby charged with ...

Published · 3,376 views

Experiencing a deep, loving connection is one of the most meaningful aspects of a healthy relationship. But achieving and maintaining this connection isn't always easy. You (or your partner) can have a strong desire for closeness and yet inadvertently push each other away at times. This is ...

Published · 1,398 views

Ed and Brenda have been married for nine years. Both describe their marriage as fulfilling and generally happy, and they experience the typical ups and downs that many couples face. They report that they share a good, solid sex life, and--as in all relationships--the passion between them ebbs ...

Published · 4,906 views

If I asked you who your best friend is, many of you would point to your spouse or partner. Close friends share a strong emotional bond, enjoy spending time with each other and often have a lot in common. However, there are important elements of a romantic relationship that set it apart from a ...

Published · 1,778 views

Q: There have been times when I'm not absolutely sure that I'm still in love with my husband. I'm afraid this means we're not right for each other, even though we've been married for several years. Can you shed any light on this? A: There are many normal factors that can influence how you feel ...

Published · 988 views

It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognize, accept, and celebrate those differences ~Audre Lorde In the beginning there were similarities… Early in your relationship, you and your partner probably rejoiced when you discovered shared interests: "I can't ...

Published · 743 views

Communication is the foundation of your relationship. Without it, you can't really have much of a relationship--just imagine how futile it is to build a house on quicksand rather than concrete. And with healthy, reciprocal communication, your marriage or relationship will continue to evolve in ...

Published · 1,790 views

In the workshops I conduct for couples, I often ask if anyone has ever lied to their partner (the couples respond anonymously). Usually more than half (sometimes as many as 90%) admit to having lied to their spouse or partner at some point. More than half the people who said they lied to ...

Published · 1,022 views

Surveys indicate that men are more likely to be unfaithful than women. Because of this unsettling statistic, it is helpful to explore the specific reasons why men -- more often than women -- may choose to have an affair. There are many reasons why you might be unfaithful. The obvious is that ...

Published · 1,620 views

Lasagna, the earth's crust, and people;what do they have in common? They're all made of layers. Our layers are certainly more complicated than pasta and cheese, and very different from the planet's natural stratifications, but as thinking, feeling humans, we're complex, layered individuals. ...

Published · 1,428 views

It’s no secret that modern life is fast-paced and getting faster every day. In this world, relationships—and all the work they require—can easily be seen as inefficient, time-consuming and simply not gratifying enough. For your relationship to have a healthy chance at survival, ...

Published · 704 views

An affair takes an enormous emotional, physical and spiritual toll on any committed relationship. The very foundation that a relationship is built upon—trust, commitment and loyalty—are shattered, and the post-affair relationship is sometimes unsalvageable because the sense of ...

Published · 2,675 views

When you consider what your relationship needs, consider the laws of gravity. An object that is set in motion will continue to move, unless something stands in its way. On the flip side, a motionless object will never move unless something acts upon it. Your relationship or marriage will remain ...

Published · 22,457 views

Anyone who has run a marathon knows about commitment. To compete, the athlete relies on extensive training and physical fitness. But when the initial enthusiasm wanes and the painful, long-distance realities grip the runner's body, it is sheer dedication--commitment to completing what she ...

Published · 15,713 views · Rated 5/5 from 2 votes

Fact #1: Certain topics of discussion proceed more smoothly with a little planning-- especially sensitive and emotional topics. Fact #2: When it comes to your marriage or relationship, you’re likely to overlook Fact #1. Permit me to make the following assumption: When you’re at ...

Published · 1,201 views

When veteran parents give advice to new parents, they often start by explaining the value of routines: bedtimes, storytimes, mealtimes, etc. Well, guess what? We may outgrow footed pajamas and Sippy cups, but we don’t outgrow our need for rituals—repeated, regular events you come ...

Published · 1,237 views

Imagine your life without goals. That’s right: pretend you just wiped away every single goal imaginable—from the mundane sort like getting out of bed and brushing your teeth to the bigger variety, like making partner at the firm. I bet you can’t imagine it. Because without goals (the ones you ...

Published · 1,436 views

Even though Travis and Linda are decades beyond the acceptable age for trick-or-treating (they’re in their mid-forties), and even though they don’t have children of their own to steer around the neighborhood, they love Halloween. No, it’s not what you think. They don’t ...

Published · 3,838 views

Q: My wife complains that I don’t talk to her enough. I really want to make her happy, so I’ve been trying to talk more. Sometimes this works and we have great conversations. But other times, when I try to give her advice, she ends up frustrated with me and I end up with my foot in my mouth. Any ...

Published · 1,173 views

For better or for worse, we’ve all learned how to be in relationships from observing the unions that surrounded us throughout our lives. If you grew up in a family where faithfulness, compassion and commitment were top priorities, and conflicts were dealt with rather than swept away, ...

Published · 1,948 views

You have the power to change your mood at this very moment—to increase your optimism, elevate your energy and enthusiasm, and increase your motivation toward reaching your personal goals. How is this possible? By sowing the seeds of gratitude. Research shows that when you increase feelings of ...

Published · 2,821 views · Rated 4/5 from 2 votes

I've yet to meet a couple that never argues. Maybe the conflict-free couple exists somewhere, but our paths haven't crossed. Even the most highly compatible couples get into spats now and then. Let's face it, with all the similarities you share with your partner or spouse, there are ...

Published · 697 views

Relationships are all about closeness. Taking the risk to open your heart and letting your partner know the real you is the most profound type of sharing. This level of intimacy can be emotionally and spiritually rejuvenating. A healthy relationship is like a high-wire circus act. Lean too far ...

Published · 9,937 views · Rated 4/5 from 2 votes

Couples seek out my services when they’re dissatisfied about some aspect of their relationship or marriage. In many instances, small problems have spiraled into larger, complicated ones. (At least the problems feel complicated.) Often, my advice is straightforward and simple, even if the ...

Published · 1,232 views

Amy just got a big promotion at work, and she rushes home to share the news with her partner Larry. She bursts in the door, her body language exuding celebration and excitement, and finds Larry in the basement, running his model railroad layout. Over the chugging and whistling of the train, ...

Published · 780 views

There aren’t too many things better than a peaceful sleep, right? You’re comfortable, you’re safe, you’re getting important needs met. But what happens when you’re sleeping so soundly that you inadvertently crush an arm for a while? The crimp in your circulation ...

Published · 754 views

We all know the grim statistics. Second marriages are more likely to end in divorce than first marriages. Yet, social animals that we are, we keep on remarrying anyway. But there is hope: there are unions that defy statistics and go on to live happily ever after. We often think of second ...

Published · 12,636 views

Second marriage success: How to strengthen your second marriage Pam voiced her frustration about problems in her second marriage: “I couldn’t believe it was happening all over again. Slowly but surely, my second husband started to do all the things my first husband did, and I ...

Published · 3,474 views

If it's the season to be jolly…nn…then why am I seeing so many stressed, beleaguered couples walking around? Is it more apt to say, 'Tis the season to feel tense, frustrated and constantly on the go? Whether you're feeling totally overwhelmed or slightly frustrated, it's easy to ...

Published · 621 views

Are you ready for the understatement of the year? Here it is: Kids will make your second marriage a complicated and challenging experience. The reason is clear: In most circumstances, children do not want their parents to divorce. Therefore, the idea of you meeting someone new and finding ...

Published · 14,199 views · Rated 3/5 from 1 votes

During a marriage crisis, life gets turned upside down and pulled apart, often in frightening and distressing ways. Like a volcanic eruption, tensions and pressures have accumulated that can no longer be contained by feelings of love or the motivation to "stick it out." The crisis often peaks when one spouse/partner decides the emotional pain is too great and seriously questions whether or not to stay in the marriage.

Published · 1,926 views · Rated 4/5 from 1 votes

"I'm tired of feeling alone in my marriage." ~Christian, married three years Often times, when couples complain about a break down in communication or some other marital/relationship problem, part of their distress centers around feeling emotionally disconnected from each other. This lack of emotional intimacy is often a warning sign that something needs to be addressed in your relationship.

Published · 1,573 views · Rated 5/5 from 1 votes

Emotional safety is something couples typically don't think about until something happens to threaten this safety. Emotional safety (knowing that you can trust your spouse/partner, that s/he has your best interest in mind and will try to be responsive to your emotional needs) creates a foundation of stability that grounds your relationship. When it is missing, the very foundation of one's relationship is compromised.

Published · 2,404 views

Questions have power. They can open our minds up to new possibilities and ways-of-being, they can alter the course of our thoughts and shape our behavior in positive ways... ...and questions can have the opposite effect, shutting us down with the force of a jackhammer. And some questions aren't questions at all, they're really statements or proclamations disguised as questions. Here's an all-too-common example of a statement pretending to be a question that never leads anywhere useful (unless, of course, your goal is a break down in communication):

Published · 1,664 views · Rated 3/5 from 4 votes

Q: I need some relationship help. While I love my husband with all my heart, sometimes it's just so frustrating being married to him. When I feel that he's ignoring me, I get so upset, and he's usually surprised by the intensity of my reaction. Why do I get so upset with him? ~Lynn, Carlsbad CA A: Thanks for the question, Lynn. Here are some thoughts that might help shed light on your experience:

Published · 2,083 views · Rated 3/5 from 2 votes

We are all embedded in a continuous stream of experience—an endless current that is too expansive to for us to take in all the information at once. One function of the mind is to help you deal with this vastness: To select, order and ultimately, create meaning out of all the life that surrounds you. This filtering of experience has great significance for your marriage/relationship.

Published · 1,643 views · Rated 5/5 from 1 votes

Men, Marriage & Emotions As a marriage/couples counselor, I often witness the emotional mismatch men and women struggle with when it comes to the world of feelings: For women, feelings are the pathway to emotional intimacy; closeness and connection are achieved by acknowledging and sharing what is felt. Feelings are something to be experienced, shared and, at times, savored with one another. For men, requests to acknowledge and integrate feelings into their life and relationships place them in unwelcome territory. Here are two possible reasons for this struggle:

Published · 1,691 views · Rated 5/5 from 1 votes

When it comes to building a healthy marriage/relationship, one of the best resources is to hear from couples who have been together for many years and, most importantly, would do it all over again with the same person. In the marriage/relationship enrichment workshops I run, there are often couples who meet this very criterion. Here are some of the important marriage/relationship advice tips these couples have shared: 1. It's not just about communication.

Published · 2,496 views · Rated 4/5 from 1 votes

If it's the season to be jolly... ...then why are there so many stressed, beleaguered couples walking around? Is it more fitting to say, 'Tis the season to feel tense, frustrated and constantly on-the-go? Whether you're feeling totally overwhelmed or slightly frustrated during the holiday season, it's easy to lose perspective about what's most important and valuable to you--your relationships. Here are five points to help you (and your spouse/partner) stay grounded during all that's going on this busy time of year:

Published · 1,221 views · Rated 5/5 from 1 votes

Beginnings and endings...and your relationship Life is a never-ending series of beginnings and endings—with each ending signaling a new beginning. And it is these beginnings that give us hope that new possibilities are available, that we can shed what hasn't worked and start anew. Each beginning is imbued with possibility, a gift waiting to be claimed by a new owner. It is our need for a fresh start that makes the New Year so meaningful to so many. Marriage and your New Year's resolution

Published · 1,410 views

Questions have the power to change people... For centuries, philosophers have known about the power of questions as a tool to finding the deeper truths about life. And questions are one of the central ways in which therapists (including marriage/couples counselors) help clients create more meaningful lives.

Published · 1,384 views · Rated 5/5 from 1 votes

Not everyone realizes they have relationship needs (emotional and physical needs that you expect your spouse/partner to meet). This is especially the case for older couples I work with who were raised in a generation where the phrases, "emotional needs" "emotional intimacy" and "need for validation" would cause confusion. In the past, a statement like, "I need you to..." might be seen as selfish, self-indulgent, and counter to what marriage is all about. But times have changed. Relationship Help: Are you entitled to have your needs met?

Published · 1,463 views · Rated 4.5/5 from 2 votes

Physical intimacy is an important component in marriage and long-term relationships. The reasons why a passionate marriage might dwindle into a sexless marriage vary widely. The first step in keeping passion alive over the long haul is to understand the roadblocks to emotional and physical intimacy. In addition to the natural reduction of sexual desire and frequency that occurs in long-term marriages/relationships, there are other factors that may be contributing to a lackluster sex life. Here are a few to consider:

Published · 2,429 views

To rekindle a relationship when it has become stagnant is very important. Let’s face it. It takes a lot of time and emotional involvement to start a relationship. Do you remember how much quality time you dedicated to the relationship? How you used to dress up for each other and take time out of your even then busy schedule to talk, to go out on dates, and to make love.

Published · 8,177 views · Rated 3.5/5 from 6 votes

When we create life in a Tantric space of merging – with connected, loving, expanded lovemaking - we can conceive a baby that feels loved even in the womb. Goddess, in her infinite wisdom, decided to join pleasure and creation together. When two people, joined in love, move and expand their sexual energy until all the cells of their body vibrate with a powerful mixture of sex and spirit, they can reach the highest level of ecstasy.

Published · 8,024 views · Rated 2.3/5 from 4 votes

In this busy age when we’re always pressed for time, people have forgotten what it’s like to touch each other just for the pleasure of it. Even if that opportunity arises, the tendency is to get caught up over ejaculatory orgasms. Admittedly, ejaculatory orgasm produces intense pleasure, but unless it is built up slowly with conscious touch it is more like a sneeze in the groin, a release of built up tension, than a deeply satisfying experience that “makes love grow” (love making).

Published · 4,150 views · Rated 3.9/5 from 7 votes

I am writing this article with the intention of helping the reader understand one of the least talked about subjects: The Innocence of Sex.

Published · 7,454 views · Rated 3.3/5 from 9 votes

Enlightened relationships fulfill all aspects of our lives. We trust each other and we feel we are on the same team so we like to help each other. There is a deep sense of belonging. We discuss important issues together. We laugh together. We love to express our sensuality freely, with ...Enlightened relationships fulfill all aspects of our lives. We trust each other and we feel we are on the same team so we like to help each other. There is a deep sense of belonging. We discuss important issues together. We laugh together.

Published · 2,883 views

Keeping the passion high in any relationship depends a lot on how safe you make it for your partner to say the truth to you. We like to say we want to hear the truth, “even if it hurts us,” but actually we often act in ways that make it difficult or even impossible to do that. If you tend to cut off or interrupt your partner when they are talking, they may feel you don’t care what they have to say. If you are always very neutral in your expression and your response, they may feel you feel their ideas are unimportant, or boring.

Published · 2,883 views · Rated 3.7/5 from 3 votes

The Tantric path is to reunite with our Divine spark. It encourages us to identify with our Higher Self, our Divine essence. When you identify with your Higher Self, you live in a heightened vibrational field and you are open to the intuition coming to you from your Divine self, guiding you to the fulfillment of your life and your mission.

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Good communication is the foundation of every great relationship. Listening and being listened to are signs of care and respect for your partner. When you feel cared for, you have more energy flowing through you, and sex is better. Real, powerful Intimacy comes from such caring and respect for your partner. Here are some good tips: 1. Make sure you have your partner’s attention without demanding that they stop what they are doing to listen to you, unless it’s an emergency. If one of you is busy when you want to talk, set up a time when you both can pay attention to each other.

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Tantra wants you to have pleasure and guides you to have the Divine pleasure of merging the male and female energies into One. It uses this pleasure to bring more joy and light into your life. If you are living a disconnected life, you will experience the opposite – being separated from your Divine connection saps your vitality and joy. I’m sure you have experienced that when you are afraid, ashamed, or doing something out of habit, you feel low energy and are unenthusiastic.

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