Browse Positive Psychology

It is bad enough when a stranger or foe betrays you, but when it is someone you believed to be a close and trusted friend, partner, or spouse, it is especially hurtful. It might feel like you were taken advantage of, deceived, humiliated, despised, cheated, or stabbed in the back. Oftentimes it comes as a surprise. That is why it is so painful. You would not expect to be hurt so badly from someone you thought you could trust. So you are left in disbelief and unbelievable pain.

How many times have you said to yourself, “I wish my mind would just shut itself off. I need to sleep!” Then you began thrashing around in bed, trying to find a comfortable position … never quite finding it. Mind on go. Body exhausted. Beating yourself up for having a sleep problem. Angry and at a loss for a solution.

When we love ourselves and trust ourselves all things are possible.

Holistic mental health counseling is a new and growing field based in traditional mental health wisdom, herbal and nutritional medicine and many other integrative therapies. Holistic mental health care is a total person approach that includes all aspects and layers of an individuals life. Most holistic mental health professionals believe that real and lasting healing begins on the inside, within the person’s heart, mind, body and soul and extends outward through positive change in thought and behavior.

Relationship management becomes more important as you assume more professional responsibility. You need skills to build bonds, inspire, influence and develop others. All the while you need to be open to change, manage conflict and establish teamwork. Emotional Intelligence author Daniel Goleman believes it is possible to build better relationships one step at a time.

The Rosebush - Mindful Gardening is an excerpt from Janet's mindfulness book, Pathwasy to Wholenss If we are being mindful (fully aware) of a newly purchased Rosebush, we carefully attend to it so that it can be planted, root, mature and thrive in a way that is mutually beneficial to the Rosebush, to ourselves, the environment surrounding the bush, and to the environment of our yard and beyond. • Compatibility of all living things

Inner Oasis is a term I coined ten or more years ago to help my clients and class participants create a lush, rich imagery of their core self. Our Inner Oasis is our soul-self, our inner wisdom, our inner joy and our innermost source of pure, unconditional love. It is ever replenishing, ever nurturing, ever there to support our jou ey and guide our life.

A jou al is a way to keep a record of something that is important to us. This jou al safely keeps our thoughts about the creation of Joy. I kept one for a long time, and now I think it would be fun if you kept one too. There is no better way in the world to have a visual of our daily blessings and all the little miracles that happen. Joy Jou alr

This article was first published in Sibyl on line magazine for women, December 1, 2011 “WHEN YOUR SENSE OF SELF IS NO LONGER TIED TO THOUGHT, is no longer conceptual, there is a depth of feeling, of sensing, of compassion, of loving, that was not there when you were trapped in mental concepts. You are that depth.” ~ Eckhart Tolle You are that depth. You have within you an inner oasis, a place of harmony and love. It is there to provided you with the comforting feelings of self-love, including the feelings of peacefulness.

If someone were to throw a punch at you, you would likely try to defend yourself from getting hit. And if you were to feel the heat of a flaming fire, you would keep yourself far enough away to avoid getting burned. Self-preservation comes naturally as no one wants to experience pain and injury. So threats to our well-being motivate us to distance ourselves from anything with the potential to harm us. It is a necessary and reasonable response in many situations.

To be demanding isn’t all bad, but there are many ways in which it can be unloving. It is one thing to be persistent in asking or requiring something, but excessively demanding one’s own way regardless of others’ rights or how they are treated indicates self-centeredness. Overly demanding people are not conce ed with what others want because they are mostly conce ed with themselves. And they can be very insensitive and uncaring when it comes to getting what they want. Demanding people are often forceful in trying to get their way.

Life feels positive when you experience happiness. Happiness is one of many ingredients that make a positive life positive. However, it takes many more ingredients to create the positive life you want.

We go through our days, busy and rather unaware. We run our errands, care for our family, go to and from work not really having consciously experienced all the wonderful moments of the day. Keeping a Joy Jou al is about becoming more conscious of your joys and less focused or your pain.

Academically Speaking “The field of positive psychology at the individual level, is about positive individual traits: the capacity for love and vocational courage, interpersonal skill, aesthetic sensibility, perseverance, forgiveness, originality, future mindedness, spirituality, high talent and wisdom. At the group level, it is about the civic virtues and the institutions that move individuals toward better citizenship: responsibility, nurturance, altruism, civility, moderation, tolerance, and work ethic.” (Seligman and Csikszentmihalyi, American Psychologist: 2000)

If you believe that greater happiness is something you can achieve on your own, think again. In his groundbreaking A Primer in Positive Psychology , Chris Peterson summarizes positive psychology in three words: "Other people matter." Happiness resides in the individual, in one-on-one relationships (dyads), and within groups. Although we can achieve happiness alone, we are biologically wired and evolutionarily selected to find happiness in our relationships with others. Pursui

In relationships, we are always on the lookout for ways to please the other person. Nothing wrong with that, except when you constantly try to seek validation from others and act in a manner that is not the natural ‘you’ then the relationship suffers. Personal empowerment and a belief in your self-worth are essential aspects for the success of any relationship. If you are depending on your relationship to fill the voids in your life, then you are looking for trouble. It is a much better idea to empower yourself.

What happens if I believe I am physically, emotionally and spiritually whole? Better yet, what if I take a leap of faith and I think, behave, make choices, and live within the belief that I am whole, healthy, secure, peaceful, loving and lovable? Belief Silence. We are born from silence. If we live from the silence within, we know our wholeness lives there too. It is limitless, ete al, trustworthy, joyous, compassionate, loving and real. Wholeness is not broken. It cannot be broken, as each piece is part of the whole and contains the mystery of the whole.r

Published in The Art of Wellbeing Magazine, 2009 There are various pathways that guide us in our quest for wholeness and unification with our innermost self. One pathway that I have come to cherish is Walking Meditation. This method seems to nurture me, relax me, and provide the space and time I need to be alone with myself in satisfying, restful and renewing introspection. This is true whether I walk or whether I simply practice Meditative Breathing and the other skills associated with this healing art.

Janet Gallagher Nestor, MA, LPC, DCEP Holistic Mental Health Therapist Just like most of humanity, my response varies on different days depending on what I am experiencing, where I am and what I am doing. My goal is to stay centered and balanced, but sometimes I choose to employ my self-care skills to help me through a rough patch of emotion.

BIG, HAPPY SMILES ARE FREE and they are instantly understood regardless of language or culture. Receiving a big smile, complete with twinkling eyes, is a gift. My heart opens wide to all the possibilities that shine within your smile.

EACH NEW YEAR WE ARE REBORN. The slate is clean. You choose the canvas, the medium, the brush and you'll paint 2012 with your own colors. The result of your art, the final product, is up to you. You build your new year one brush stroke, one thought at a time. Regardless of your past history, regardless of the problems you face today, your finances and the quality of your life, you choose how you live your life. You choose the thoughts you think, the beliefs you live by and the actions you take regarding your thoughts and beliefs.

Love, trust and forgiveness are the essentials of life. I know that I need these three nurturing ingredients, and I know you need them too. I have found that living within a family is a magnificent gift and a loving commitment. To make the family work, each member offers the gift of being physically, emotionally and spiritually available to the other family members. As insurance, we grow a connection between us so deep and strong that love, trust and forgiveness reach across time and distance to mutually nurture each others heart and soul.

Life is now. There was never a time when your life was not now, nor will there ever be.rn- Eckhart Tolle When asked about being fully present and focused, my client answered something like this: I don't know that I am ever present or fully focused. My mind is all over the place and my friends tell me I don't know how to relax. I am a type A personality, and I am always busy.

From Pathways to Wholeness, p. 85-86 Recorded for you at www.mindfulpathways.com I created this exercise for my own personal healing jou ey, and share various versions of it with my clients on a regular basis. The exercise can be practiced daily. If we have physical health issues or any sort ofrndifficult emotional history or trauma, I suggest the exercise be practiced as often as possible. It is deeply soothing and healing and meant to help us contact our “authentic self” … the one that is exquisitely formed, whole, unified, and at perfect peace.

February/March Article written for Sibyl Spiritual EZine for Women

In my counseling work I see a lot of people with chronic physical health issues and chronic mental health issues. We all think that chronic illness begins with the diagnosis from the doctor. I don't think that is true. I know it is not true energetically. It takes a long time to get sick, and the chronic illness that is now official might have begun 20 or more years ago. This is why self-care and self-love are so important. The more love and acceptance we give to ourselves, the healthier we are in mind-body-emotions-spirit.

Some relaxation music to read by: Dolphins Delight by Ambient Space) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UThOseyShA8&feature=youtu.be You probably don’t like feeling stressed or that unidentifiable underlying unease that defines anxiety. Many of us lump all of our symptoms into one broad category and call it stress – but many of us are really suffering from chronic anxiety.

TO MAKE SENSE OF OUR FAST PACED WORLD and our hectic lives we need emotional balance. With balance comes a kinder more flexible life. When our inner environment is balanced we are free to enjoy ourselves and accomplish our goals. Without balance, we feel frustrated and hopeless, wondering how to survive life's rat race.

Pages 23-25 from my book Pathways to Wholeness All positive thought is based on the principles of unconditional love and by definition, contains the following ingredients: 1. Positive intention 2. Positive content 3. Positive outcome for self, others, and for all life in generalr Why is positive thought important? A thought is pure energy and therefore has a life of its own. Once the thought is formed, it drifts into an unseen current and becomes part of a universal collective of thought that affects life not only today, but throughout all time. If you thinkr

I don't know the percentage of people who come into my office living in abuse or needing to work through past abuse. The ratio is astoundingly high. When I worked in substance abuse residential care, the percentage was probably 99%.

I thought you might enjoy an excerpt from my new book, Nurturing Wellness Through Radical Self-Care: A Living in Balance Workbook. I hope you find the information helpful.

n n Overcoming Adversity nIt seems there are two main types of coaching clients: Those who are defeated by nothing and those who give up at the first "bump in the road". The operative word is "bump", not "hill", not "mountain", not "mountain range" but "bump”.nnWhat does this mean? This refers to the type of person who chooses a goal and plans a way to accomplish it, but gives up at the first minor setback, disappointment or adversity. Perhaps the goal is to get physica

“People Tested” suggestions that help us build and strengthen our existing inner resources. Enrich YOUR life one step at a time.

Positive psychology is a wonderful state of mind, a way of thinking that brings joy, happiness, fun, laughter and contentment into our life. This article, origninally written for Sibyl spiritual e-zine for women, is about a positive consciousness that allows all of us to be part of the wholeness of being human and spirit - a unity of being. Creation gives us everything we need, somtimes in the form of physical helpers and teachers. Sometimes in the form of experience. Recognizing our helpers, teachers and growth opportunities is our challenge. Earth Angels

After a morning filled with an Easter Egg Hunt, moments of remembrance related to Easter's deeper meanings, and a breakfast fit for a prince and princess my husband and our grandson Kodiak went off for some time together. Our granddaughter Lucy and I went for a walk along the greenway that boarders our neighborhood and follows along beside a pretty little creek. We decided to walk toward the woods and then on into the trees as far as we could go. We did not expect the old narrow path to be so expanded, but it had been turned into a bike trail!

I have come across many articles and discussions on infidelity lately and find that there is a consensus. Infidelity, adultery, having an affair, cheating, betrayal... or whatever it is you want to call it, is a growing problem. Why is this? Some say that our culture has contributed to an increased discontent and unhappiness in our lives. We seek pleasure and expect our partners to meet our needs. If they don’t, we blame them for our unhappiness. Marriage becomes more about meeting my needs and making me happy.

The detrimental effects of a negative attitude hinder your life’s progress and severely limit your life’s satisfaction and happiness. Effects Of A Negative Attitude Let me discuss some effects of a negative attitude, and how you can quickly banish it from your life. NEGATIVE ATTITUDE A negative attitude is the simple perception of seeing the bad things in life. This is a continuing and pervasive disease which is very common amongst adults. Psychologists have stated that t

I love books and I often go on a reading binge that lasts for weeks at a time. Pathways to Wholeness is about mindful meditation, personal growth, spiritual development and personal healing. I'd like to mention some of the books that touched my heart and inspired my personal wellness jou ey. Wayne Dyer: Your Sacred Selfr

I have chosen to share a philosophy of healing that was defined for me a year or so ago during meditation. This new way of thinking is going to change your life and the lives of those you love and cherish. You’ll change your self-talk and change the way you interact with members of your family when they are sick or suffering. It applies to the work you’ll encounter during your Nurturing Wellness through Radical Self-Care Program. You’ll have some new things to consider as you choose your strategies for a positive life jou ey.

I am Thankful for… A Fit & Healthy Body The first entry in this gratitude series focused on mental and emotional health. Here I will share my gratitude for physical health which I believe is a very significant part of our overall well-being. We sometimes overlook the mind and body connection, focusing on one or the other when trying to resolve problems. I know I did until I began to learn and discover how close this connection really is. A weak or sick body can have an influence on a person’s mood or motivation.

He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion. ~unknown Anyone who loves and owns a pet knows the joy of companionship and love they provide. Pets are our devoted friends. Following are just some of the many benefits that having a pet can bring: Love & Affection Pets offer humanity one thing that we all need and seek, that is, the miracle-working power of unconditional love.

I have been wrestling with a very deep trust issue, one that has been with me since conscious memory. This morning in meditation I asked for understanding and I was guided through the meditation by a member of my spiritual family of guides and teachers. I think Mataji has been with me all my life. I don't remember how I first met her, but she was an “imaginary friend” when I was about four years old. At the time I named her Gently and Gently remained her name until about 1999 when an exceptional meditation teacher and clairvoyant showed me her picture and told me her real name was Mataji.

Published in the Dec/Jan 2010 issue of Sibyl On-Line Spiritual Jou al for Women Circuit: A partial or continuous path over which a current flows. Winter holiday excitement is literally floating in the air and into our hearts. Radio stations are offering continuous play of holiday tunes and our homes are festively dressed for celebration. We want these joyous feelings to last forever.

I am a nurse and shift work is hard on the body. I have 12 hour days and 12 hour night shifts to contend with which makes it hard on circadian rhythms and getting proper sleep. I also work every other week-end. Some workplaces that have shift work have two weeks on one shift and then two weeks ...

Can love be real without sincerity? Most would agree that sincerity is what makes love what it is. Genuine love is true. And it is true love that we all want. We want to know we are sincerely loved for who we are. We want to know that it is with sincere motives that those who love us say and do the things they say and do for us. We want to know a love that enables us to trust without fear of being unloved and rejected. We want a love that remains loyal and faithful to us no matter what happens. We want to be loved sincerely. And that is how others want to be loved by us as well.

The Acceptable 3 F’s (Faith, Family, and Friends)” Our focus today should be faith, family, and friends. I want to emphasize the importance of all three because each increases the quality of your life. Find time out of your schedule for each priority of faith, family, and friends. These three things will create a foundation for happiness. When you are overly busy with work and rushing from place to place, you will realize that an important area of your life is keeping in touch and connecting with your faith, family, and friends.

One of the most important decisions you will ever make is the decision of who you will spend the rest of your life with. Why is this so important? It is important because the direction of your life will be greatly influenced by that very choice. With time couples become alike in many ways. They learn from one another’s way of thinking and behaving, and they come to share values and world views. Their relationship shapes who they become, their level of happiness, their outlook, as well as their goals and dreams.

I am Thankful for… A Healthy Mind & Emotions If we stop to think about it, there are so many things to be grateful for. As I was reflecting on all the good things, people, and blessings I enjoy, I starting compiling a long list. It seemed it would never end. In all actually, it never will end because our blessings are new every morning. In this series, I am going to share different areas of gratitude in my life. I am going to start the first of this Gratitude journal Series with: I am Thankful for A Healthy Mind and Emotions. 1. I am thankful to be free from negativity.

Introduction: Thoughts are much finer than the electricity. Human thoughts are the greatest dynamic force on the earth. A strong thought makes a man stronger from within. There is a famous and good quote in English that “Thinking makes the man”. Therefore, one should always have positive thoughts. Each and every thought has its own value and power. If one thinks positively, then positive energies are attracted towards him and he gets positive results and vice-versa. A fam

Understanding the role of the ego in how we live our lives is essential to understanding the mystery of life. Usually when people describe themselves they are referring to the egoic self or the personality, the finite side of the whole package we call me. We speak about our likes, dislikes, what we do to fill up our days. We speak of others regarding the actions they take in their lives.

“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life, but define yourself.” Harvey S. Firestone Bully: a blustering, quarrelsome, overbearing person who habitually badgers and intimidates smaller or weaker people .

A person's mindset as well as thought process contributes significantly for their character. Individuals who stay positive possess a much better lifestyle as well as a driven attitude. They are factors which have an effect on your own belief with regards to making the kind of life you want. Research has shown that you simply perception of life also affects your wellbeing as well as nicely-being. Most of the negative thoughts come from presumptions all of us help to make. We

Why Detoxify? We live in a polluted world. Our environment, air supply, water and foods are full of herbicides, pesticides, chemicals of all kinds, and normal every day allergens like dust and mold. Our organs and our bodies get worn down by all the extra work they do attempting to filter out all of the pollutants and allergens. The world has seen an increase in cancer, lowered male sperm count, heart disease, birth defects – including developmental disabilities and many other illnesses and disorders since the early 1900's. Here are some statistics.r

There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will be to treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity. ~Nathaniel Branden You may have heard it said that you can not love others if you do not love yourself. Having self-love means you care about and like yourself in a healthy and balanced way. It means you have self-respect and believe you are worthy of love.

Although similar in many ways, jealousy and envy are not the same. Deep insecurities often lie at the root of jealousy. When someone is jealous they are afraid of losing something. They try to guard and protect what they fear losing. In doing so, they may become very possessive, competitive, and resentful. For example, they might be jealous of someone they fear can steal their boyfriend’s heart away from them, someone who got the promotion they worked hard for, or the person who got the praise and adoration they felt they deserved. Jealousy can be fear of losing any of the following:

by Janet Gallagher Nestor, MA, LPC, DCEP Holistic Mental Health Therapist Most women are multi-taskers. Our culture says we can do it all: Get a good education, be an engaging conversationalist, be beautiful, marry, have children, keep a size 6 figure, have a career, clean the house, drive the car pool and be a home room mother. Even more stressful, we are expected to do it all well … and sometimes all in the same day! Even after the children are grown, the facts remain the same. We are expected to have a life that is overflowing and too busy for one person to handle comfortably.

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them. - John F. Kennedy How trustworthy are our words if there is no action behind them? We can tell our kids not to smoke, but if they see us smoking, can we realistically expect them to listen? We can say we care about our health, but do our eating habits support our claim? The old adage rings true: Actions speak louder than words. It is not just the words we say that reveal the condition of our hearts. People watch what we do more than what we say.

It's only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth -- and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up -- that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had. ~Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

We are either the masters or the victims of our attitudes. It is a matter of personal choice. Who we are today is the result of choices we made yesterday. Tomorrow, we will become what we choose today. To change means to choose to change. ~John Maxwell What kind of thoughts come to your mind when you think about your life? How about your family, your work, your future? Suppose your thoughts could change your destiny. Would you want to change or improve any of them?

Money is the hot topic these days. Whether you have it and are afraid of losing it or you don't know where your next paycheck is coming from, right now we all seem to share some form of 'money fear.' What if your beliefs about money were fueling how money flows in, or out of your life? Take this simple test to find out your FEQrn(Financial Emotional Intelligence) “Money Money Money Money, MONEY — Some people got to have it …..- Some people really need it…Almighty Dollar!

Take care of yourselves, your body and your family and friends, with much love Both the vitality level and the energy level of our bodies are affected from the way we live our lives and from the way we treat our bodies. We are influenced by the food we eat, the drinks we sip and consume into our bodies and the physical activities that we do. These are all in turn influenced by the level of happiness and love that we have in our lives. And so it is important to be aware and to take responsibility for the way we feel and live. Foodr

There is nothing that adequately prepares us for the most important job there is—parenting. Children and teens do not come with an owner’s manual, and most of our training is on the job. With our own parents as our most prominent role models, we tend to repeat what we have learned about parenting from them. We do our best, learn as we go, and make our own mistakes along the way; but we don’t have to leave our parenting to chance. We can become more effective parents. We can parent with more confidence instead of frustration.

A general definition of, "normal," according to the dictionary, is: "conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural." The Psychology definition is: "approximately average in any psychological trait, as intelligence, personality, or emotional adjustment"; also, "free from any mental disorder; sane."

You cannot be grateful and bitter. You cannot be grateful and unhappy. You cannot be grateful and without hope. You cannot be grateful and unloving. So just be grateful. ~author unknown

Thank God every morning when you get up that you have something which must be done, whether you like it or not. Work breeds a hundred virtues that idleness never knows. ~Charles Kingsley Work keeps our minds occupied. It forces us to set and meet goals that lead to a sense of accomplishment. It encourages us to put our skills and talents to use. Work helps us to develop confidence in what we can do and how we can contribute. It connects us to other people. It is an essential part of our lives and a human need.

It’s challenging sometimes to know what’s wrong in your relationship. If you’re like many other people, you probably want a loving relationship more than anything else in the world. Maybe you’ve tried and tried and tried to make your relationship work and yet somehow you just seem to be going back over the same old arguments again and again. Questions to consider about control or verbal abuse: • Does your partner always monopolize the conversation? • Does s/he always need to be right? • Does s/he regularly judge or criticize you for things you do and say?r

Recently, my daughter made a trip to the town where she was born. Unfortunately, it was not a happy occasion. The daughter of one of her childhood friends had committed suicide. The girl was 15 years old when she decided that she could not tolerate any more bullying. The only way she could stop the pain and humiliation was to take her own life. The day of her funeral, the daughter of another friend was found unconscious on the bathroom floor in her home. She had overdosed on some prescription drugs she had found in the medicine cabinet.

Many people cling to the myth that those who are successful inevitably feel good about themselves and are free from self-doubt and insecurities. I’ve worked with many clients whose résumés, personal achievements, and reputations garner the deepest respect and admiration, yet their negative self-talk is often utterly brutal. Despite their low opinion of themselves, they’ve managed to fashion lives that many would envy.

“Take a deep breath” you must have heard these words many a times but hardly anybody knows how it helps us. Breathing is very important part of our life. If we don’t eat we might survive for one week or if we don’t drink then we might survive for 3 or 4 days but if we don’t breathe then we can’t survive for more than 2 minutes. So let’s understand how deep breathing works and what are its benefits.

A lot has been written about the effects of our thinking on our life. By now many people know that in some way or another our thinking affects our life. We hear things like: “Think positive, there are two sides to the coin, the glass is either half empty or half full”. Does this sound familiar? ...

Depression is very serious and often goes untreated in children and teens. Symptoms are commonly overlooked or minimized as part of growing up or something that will pass with time. Child and teen depression has a negative impact on development, school performance, and relationships. Children and adolescents with depression feel sad or hopeless. They might be easily irritated or angry. They lose interest and motivation for the things they once enjoyed. They may feel bad about themselves and lack in confidence.

I remember when I was a child how much I loved my grandmother Rose Silverman's things. They were not just the functional plastic items, earthenware and stuffed sofas that most families had when I grew up. All of the furniture and things in her apartment were 'alive' with romance, magic and ...

Making a big deal about the “little things” can make your life richer and more fulfilling. We’ve all heard the phrase “Don’t sweat the small stuff” and I wholeheartedly agree. We must not let life’s little daily annoyances and irritations cause us to “lose our cool” or bring us to a place of tension and stress.rn rnOn the flip-side, it is easy to overlook the right “little things” or “small stuff” unless we intentionally decide to rnMake a Big Deal A

"With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts."Eleanor Roosevelt Very few people might know that how we spend our day depends on how we start it. Have you ever noticed that your entire day becomes a mess if something goes wrong in the morning like, you could not find your shirt you wanted to wear or you missed your daily bus or train or you had a fight with your spouse. We can make every day best days of our life if we start it in a positive way. We just need to give a positive momentum and everything else will be taken care of.

Today let's concentrate on being happy. Live life like a child! If you capture the spirit of a child, life becomes much easier. Never let life's pressures bring you down! This is the day the Lord has made--we will rejoice and be glad in it! ~Rev Run Take a moment and think about how you began ...

We’ve got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can’t just accept it and leave it in the cupboard or just think it’s going to get on by itself. You’ve got to keep watering it. You’ve got to really look after it and nurture it. ~John Lennon

Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses. ~ George Washington Carver There never was and there never will be another person exactly like you. Your way of thinking, your appearance, you inherent talents and interests, your skills are like no other. You have untapped potential inside you yet to be discovered and released. As Og Mandino would say, you are "nature's greatest miracle." Are you living like the successful person you were born to be?

If you want to be a healthy, happy person, it’s very important to learn to love the person you see in the mirror. Although loving yourself can be very challenging if you grew up in a dysfunctional family, it’s definitely worth the time and effort! Whether you feel stressed, anxious or depressed, or whether you are in a challenging relationship or going through a divorce, learning to love yourself is a crucial step in your healing process. When you honestly love yourself, your love overflows to everyone around you and everything in your life begins to sparkle and shine!

As a therapist in Los Angeles I’ve seen more than my share of patients who are dealing with various forms of depression and unhappiness. One common personality trait I’ve found with them is their unwholesome thoughts and beliefs that come from what I call the “wanting mind.” In wanting mind, we feel that our current state of unhappiness can only be cured if we have more money, recognition, fame, or power.

Just imagine for a moment what life would be like if each individual on earth were allowed to own just one automobile per lifetime. Do you think you would be more motivated to take better care of your vehicle—getting routine tune-ups and oil changes, rotating tires, keeping it clean, and so forth? Some of us might have a very different attitude about it altogether. We might take our responsibility to care for it more seriously. And we would most likely appreciate and cherish it much more.

There aren’t too many things in life that ever stay the same. Sometimes that can be a good thing and other times it simply isn’t. Life presents us with new and unexpected challenges that block our goals and force us to make some major adjustments. When we have our eyes set on a goal, we don’t ...

We are either the masters or the victims of our attitudes. It is a matter of personal choice. Who we are today is the result of choices we made yesterday. Tomorrow, we will become what we choose today. To change means to choose to change. ~John Maxwell What kind of thoughts come to your mind when you think about your life? How about your family, your work, your future? Suppose your thoughts could change your destiny. Would you want to change or improve any of them?

“Beware of the Unhappy List” So I am sure many are wondering, why I would make an unhappy list after I have made a happy list? The unhappy list serves as a matter of identification of those things that disrupts the flow of happiness in our daily lives. It can be used as a practice to set goals to eliminate challenges that just make things complicated. Yet, it ultimately challenges each of us to find a solution.

In our drive for the good life, it seems that we have become obsessed with the need to be “perfect”! Why can’t we just let our selves be who we are at the moment? As human beings we are constantly changing and evolving as our life changes. We cannot stop this process no matter how hard we try. We do not need to be obsessive about it! We raise our children to always want to be the best of the best. If they do not reach for the top and become superstars, we treat them like they are losers.

Mindfulness – So What? Most have heard of mindfulness while few truly practice it Mindfulness comes to us in two forms: the spiritual/meditative practice or as a tool in self examination and behavior control.

I love to see the sparkle in a person's eyes when they realize that anything is possible--when they finally get in touch with the potential inside themselves, and they begin to imagine what they'd love to enjoy in their life.

Are You Being Active and Making Healthy Choices? In the pursuit of happiness, one must always challenge themselves to be productive. It is not always good to just sit around and allow the mind to wonder. Yes, brainstorming is good to make a decisive decision but an idle mind can create boredom and unhealthy choices. Often, we find ourselves restless, eating, drinking, or smoking to compensate for a peace of mind. This is not the answer.

Happiness is itself a kind of gratitude. ~ Joseph Wood Krutch When I first came across this quote, I had to stop and think about it. Why would happiness be a kind of gratitude? According to Webster's Dictionary, to be grateful or thankful is to be conscious of a benefit being received and to be well pleased.

How wonderful it would be if we could help our children and grandchildren to learn thanksgiving at an early age. Thanksgiving opens the doors. It changes a child's personality. A child is resentful, negative—or thankful. Thankful children want to give, they radiate happiness, they draw people. ~ Sir John Templeton

When you strike out in anger, you might miss the other person, but you will always hit yourself. ~Jim Gallery Striking out with angry words is the cause of so many relationship problems. Words are powerful. They can encourage, strengthen, and change destinies. They can also destroy potential and robs us of hope and peace. Most major fires begin with just a small flame. Before long the fire spreads and becomes more and more difficult to contain. It damages or completely destroys everything in its path. Do we realize how quickly unmanaged anger can do significant damage?

Many people are sick today and no one seems to understand why this is so. We live in the best of times and the worst of times. We used to think of pollution as smog, such as not being able to see the blue sky in Los Angeles. Today, In 2011, we have many forms of pollution. We live in a contaminated world. Not only do we have all of the ills of the industrial age, with its carbon emmissions, but we have new particles that can make us sick. We live in an age of electromagnetic pollution, weapons/grade biotoxins, chemical toxins, noise pollution, nuclear radiation.

Before you got into a couples relationship, you had your own friends to hang out with and have fun. You never had to worry about a partner who did not like your friends or did not want to hang out with them. You never had to conce yourself with problems that could arise if you simply wanted to spend some time with your friends rather than your partner. But once you left the singles scene and became a couple, some things regarding friendships began to change.

n n Gratefulness nWhat would your day be like if you started and ended it by simply noticing all that you have in your life? If you count all your assets, you always show a profit. Gratitude is a natural high. When you live in tandem with your spirit, appreciating all of life and what you have, you discover more joy and kindness in the world. Miracles happen everywhere all the time, but only those with an “Attitude of Gratitude” seem to notice them. This circle of

As a writer of personal development or self actualization articles, I find that I am often confronted with the remark: “If you know all this stuff, how come you aren’t perfect?” Believe me; I make all kinds of mistakes in my life. I am about as far from perfect as anyone else. I have my fears, foibles, quirks, etc just like everyone else.

I recently rejoined the Pacific Tai Chi Society. I realized after much prompting from my body (and my mind!) that I needed to get more physical exercise as part of my stress release and relaxation program. When I was an active member several years ago, I had just come out of a messy relationship so my mind was fraught with noisy self accusations and useless innuendos. I had not learned how to manage my mind very well back then, not that I am perfect at it now, so the noise was alost unbearable.

I am beginning another new venture. It's something I did, a very long time ago, but I enjoyed it and I think I will enjoy it again. It involved working with people of all ages so that makes it a good thing. It involves my faith, so that also makes it even better. It's not like I needed something to fill my time, because my time really is full with all the activities I have taken on over the past five or six months, but I needed a little something to bring in some money and this will do that very nicely. Another thing that I love added to the 'pot.' Life is really good!

These past few weeks, billions of fans watched athletes from around the world compete in the London Olympics. These diverse games reflect the delicate balance between reality and entertainment; the Olympics can satisfy the yearning for distraction from your immediate concerns about economic instability and caring for your family-in-flux. The Games provide color, drama and a broad demonstration of excellence. In addition to news about the venues, there is information streaming

How many times have you told yourself, "It's just your imagination"? How many times, particularly when you were young, were you told, "It was just your imagination"? Have you ever told anyone, when they confided an experience to you, "It was just your imagination"?

"Our attitudes control our lives. Attitudes are a secret power working twenty-four hours a day, for good or bad. It is of paramount importance that we know how to harness and control this great force." Tom Blandi Maintaining a positive attitude is important for you to achieve success in your life. Keeping a good upbeat attitude will also lead you to a happier and contented life. The challenging part however, is maintaining this kind of attitude during times of challenge and a

Divorce is a major stressful event for children and adults. To children, divorce is confusing. They have so many conce s and questions about how their lives will change. They cannot control what is happening to their family, and they often think that they are responsible for their parents divorce. Strong emotions are experienced such as hurt and anger. For adults and children, divorce is an adjustment that takes time. It is more difficult for some than others, depending on a number of factors. Conflict between parents creates more stress and difficulty for children of divorce.

Did you ever have so much to do that you didn’t know where to begin? So you just stared at what appeared to be a mountain before you, and you felt totally overwhelmed. Trying to take on too much at once can make you feel like you can’t handle any of it. It causes anxiety, distress and confusion. You lose your focus because your energies are scattered. And you feel pulled in every direction. Slowing down isn’t an option because then you would just get further behind and that would only cause more stress. What exactly is stress?

I recently (in 2010), got back in contact with an individual, who was literally my heart and soul. You know, one of those people you thought you loved unconditionally, until things started to reveal itself. The late musicia Rick James used to say, “Cocaine is a hell of a drug.” Cocaine, my dear people, is not ANYBODY’S friend. The fact that it is widely available across the globe, really destroys lives, and relationships. However, the effects of cocaine (having seen someone

Autosuggestions or affirmations are easy positive declarations which could be repeated everyday to make a positive personal change or just improve your life. They are vehicles in which you could free yourself from the over-dependence on other persons’ opinions, feelings or attitudes about you and so it will lead you to feel great about yourself. Autosuggestions should be positive and self-healing scripts you offer to yourself to contradict your negative self-programming or

I often see patients in my psychotherapy practice who are unable to make changes in their life and do not understand why they keep sabotaging their efforts. Usually this is due to a hidden resistance or unwholesome belief associated with the desired change. There are five hindrances that I’ve found to be particularly common in the experience of resisting needed or inevitable change: the hindrances of wanting, illusory thinking, sleeping mind, restlessness, and doubt.

We are often told to aim high in life, but we must aim at what we would hit instead. A general purpose is not enough. The arrow shot from the bow does not wander around to see what it can hit on its way, but flies straight to the mark. ~Og Mandino

People will forget what you did; people will forget what you said; but they won’t forget the way you made them feel. ~unknown We all love to be around people who make us feel good. They may make us laugh and not take life too seriously. Their attitude and perspective may encourage us. They make us feel at ease and free to be ourselves. And, we may feel appreciated and loved when we are around them. When we think about the people we like to be around, what is it about them that makes us feel good?

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give. ~Winston Churchill We live in a give-and-take society. When we give, we usually expect to get something in return. But sometimes we give for the sheer joy of giving. We don’t expect anything in return. It just makes us feel good to know that our giving has made a positive impact; it has helped in some way or it has made someone happy.

Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy ~Leo Buscaglia What is worry? Worry is negative meditation. To meditate is to be occupied in thought, to ponder and reflect. So when we worry, our thoughts are occupied with things that cause us distress, fear, or dread. Worry puts stress on our minds and bodies. It can literally make us sick. Studies have found links between stress and illness. Stress weakens our immune system, making us more vulnerable to viruses and other illnesses. Worry clouds our perception. Decision-making is impaired.

Practicing gratitude is one of the best habits we can develop. It not only changes our lives, but it affects others around us. Our gratitude is like a positive energy that can inspire and energize others. I knew a woman who always confessed that she had a black cloud that followed her wherever she went. And guess what, it did! That black cloud was her negativity and lack of gratitude. Although she had much to be thankful for and some good opportunities in her life, she always found something to grumble and complain about. This woman was one of the most unhappy people I have ever known.

Everyone likes positive feedback. It is known that it is helpful in building self-esteem and success. In fact, schools and parents have been doing a good job giving more positive feedback since the push in the seventies and eighties to build children’s self-esteem. Research indicates self-esteem scores have jumped significantly for children in the last thirty years. I was actually part of that movement as I wrote my dissertation on the interaction of self-esteem, anxiety, and achievement.

It comes as no surprise, but stress isn’t good for you. Well of course, you knew that already but the question for most people is how to tame it. Here’s a secret I discovered: In actuality there is no such thing as a ‘stress thing’ outside of us. It is our interpretation of the events in our life that causes us to feel stressed or not.

We all are aging every second of every day that sounds depressing doesn’t? It does not have to, you can age like a super star and below are 11 ways you can do that and it won’t cost you a cent.

Matt has an online relationship with a woman from another state. It isn’t anything serious, so why worry his wife? Katie has been hiding her spending sprees from her husband that has put them into serious financial debt. She is afraid if he finds out he will never forgive her. Jason never told his wife that he got fired from his job, but rather, that he got laid off. He did not want her to lose faith and respect for him.

A person can live forty days without food, seven days without water, and a few minutes without air; but he cannot live one second without hope. ~unknown Sometimes life can be so difficult, frustrating, and painful. There are times when we need someone to talk to who will listen, understand and care. There are times when we feel stuck and just don't know what to do. It can be something that has been going on for a very long time, or it might have come on suddenly and unexpectedly. Either way, these are times when we need help. We need hope that things can change and get better.

Esoteric Educational Psychology: Emission of Cosmic Pheromones Not all things can be explained even with the most advanced technology and scientific procedures, but with enough time, research, experience and esoteric wisdom we will see more than we see now. In this rapidly changing society, the ‘raising of consciousness’ is at hand. We are all part of the miraculous unfolding.

In a world where so many people are facing difficult circumstances, what can they do to overcome negative emotions and find happiness? For decades psychologists have been identifying key factors associated with happiness and with depression. However, researchers have rarely looked for a comprehensive formula that can predict happiness and depression accurately.

The current advice being given to, "think outside the box" has not noticeably changed the way the vast majority of people think, as far as I can determine. The primary reason for this is that the puzzle presented by the injunction to, "think outside the box" cannot be solved without understanding that, The Box is made up our personal Belief System.

We spend our whole life in search of love from others. We wish that true love will find us and that special love will change our life. If you don’t find the love then you fall into the valley of emptiness and feel lost. We always tell our mind that if I get true love then, I will be the happiest person on the earth. Actually it works the other way round. You need to love yourself to get love from others and you need to love yourself to give love to others. How can we give something to others which we do not have.

There is nothing quite as agonizing as waiting. We wait for people. We wait for reports and news. We wait to get to where we want to go. Waiting slows us down and it also speeds us up. It speeds us up in that we get restless, anxious and agitated. We might become even more motivated and ...

With our environment consciousness these days, we are all being careful to ensure we use energy wisely. But what about our personal energy? Just as we want to make sure the heat doesn't leak out the windows and doors of our houses, we need to have the same awareness of the energy leaks in ourselves. Here are some tips to make you a better ecologist of you own energy: 1) Write down your energy expenditures.

Want to make a change in your life? Whether it’s losing weight, a career change, or remaking a relationship if you want to make any real and lasting changes then you can’t do it alone. I work with hundreds of patients and workshop attendees who desire to transform their lives and one of the first points I tell them is that for real success they initially need to build a Wisdom Council of Support. Like an owner assembling a start-up baseball team you begin with those players who are already available to you, being mindful of the strengths and weaknesses of each.

No one gets married thinking they will get divorced some day. Most people have goals and dreams of being together forever, raising a family, and sharing life for better or for worse. They plan on being a team, growing together, and supporting one another. But somewhere along the line, they hit bumps in the road. They come up against walls, floods, and storms. Their marriage is put to the test. They are challenged to work together on successfully making it through problems and restoring their relationship. But this doesn’t always happen.

Few individuals give any thought to the question, "Who am I?" Even when some personal crises strikes, rarely does anyone ask this critical question of themselves. If pressured to come up with a verbal self-portrait, most would probably respond with a summary of what he/she believes, as well as what he/she has done in their lives.

Max Lerner says, "I am neither an optimist nor a pessimist. I am a possibilitist." If you agree with our learned friend Max Lerner then you can adopt a mindset that says “I can make it happen…or nothing is impossible”. We are well into 2005 now and often held back by our state of mind. Fear and anxiety keep us in a constant state of planning and preparation and what we need to do is engage the “forward” button and go with what we have.

There is Power in Volunteering If you volunteer your time it will make you happy instantly. Happiness is like a perfume that you can't spray without someone smelling it. Anytime that one is productive and providing a service to another to bring about a positive change or encouragement, it is gratifying. Volunteering is powerful because it is a goal that is obtainable and grants immediate results. It is reinforced from the recipient of the service granted. There are more smiles, more laughter, and even more power obtained in volunteering because more people are happy.

Have you tried positive thinking, self talk, affirmations, read books on the power of suggestion, autosuggestion, watched "the secret" or taken courses on how to materialize your goals and are still waiting for results? If so, you may be positively surprised by what you're about to learn. ...

Finally, after a summer of moving to Maryland, editing, and working with the publisher, my new book is about to be born. It is due out before Christmas and will be available on Amazon and Barnes and Nobel. I am excited because this book is a reflection of my work over the years, both as a educator and as a counselor. It combines my love of life with my love of energy psychology, mindfulness, meditation and jou aling. These amazing mind-body balancing tools are a part of my personal life and my professional life, and I am now able to share them with you.

In case you hadn't heard, there's a new-ish field within psychology, called positive psychology, which is very relevant to self growth. The premise of the field is that throughout the history of psychology, far too much emphasis has been placed on mental illness and disorder, and getting people from a "minus 5 to a zero." The aim of positive psychology is to look more deeply into the factors that cause people and groups to thrive - getting people from "zero to plus 5". One

If you have the time and money, which isn't always the case, psychotherapy should generally be seen as the first best option for addressing mental health issues such as anxiousness or a depressive state. Turning to medication straight away can be a mistake. Seeking Relief from Psychological Disorders Psychological conditions like anxiety and depression can be debilitating. They manifest both psychological and physical symptoms that interfere with day-to-day activities, especi

If you were to ask someone if they wanted more love in their life, it is very unlikely that they would say they wouldn’t and that they don’t need any more. That would be like saying you don’t need to ever eat again because you are full. Even if our lives were full of love we would still want ...

Have you ever wanted…. To be able to keep your self-control and presence of mind when everybody around you got panicked? To stay calm, when people around you annoy you and get on your nerves? Not to get angry or despaired when everything is messed up and circumstances are not in your favor? To know what to do if something unexpected happens to you? To be self-confident that even though everybody is against you, not to take offence personally and not suffer from it, especial

Babies are always more trouble than you thought and more wonderful. ~Charles Osgood Expecting a baby is a very exciting time in the life of couples wanting a child. As this precious new family member is carried in its mothers womb, the couple immediately begins to connect and care and wonder.... What will he or she look like? Will she have moms eyes? Will he have dads sense of humor? They even think ahead into the future. What talents and interests will he have? What will she do with her gift of life? How will he contribute to this world?

Did you ever have so much to do that you didn’t know where to begin? So you just stared at what appeared to be a mountain before you, and you felt totally overwhelmed. Trying to take on too much at once can make you feel like you can’t handle any of it. It causes anxiety, distress and ...

The majority of my clients resist mindfulness meditation at first, although the time commitment is small and the payoff is enormous. One insisted that it wasn’t necessary and that she didn’t have enough time in her day to devote to a regular practice. Then she went through the loss of a parent, and had such trouble coping that she couldn’t even drag herself out of bed. After missing work ten days straight, she called me for my advice. I told her to mindfully meditate while in bed. Terrified and bewildered, my client did and, in a few days, found that she could face going to work again.

1. Do at least one thing every day that makes you smile. Maybe it’s visiting the pet store, going to a matinee, reading poetry out loud, or listening to the wind chimes on a blustery day. If you have no clue about what makes you smile, put a basket in any high traffic area in your home. Whenever something happens that makes you smile, jot it down on a piece of paper and drop it in the basket. After a week or two, empty the basket and you’ll be surprised by the things

I am thankful... for simple acts of kindness

Law of Giving-Donate Your Money Giving has been called the First Law of All Creation. It has also been said that there is a Universal Law of Giving and Receiving, or that giving and receiving are the same.

What does it take to live the life you desire? Definitely, having goals you are passionate about, focus, and self-discipline give you a good start. Also there are stages in life that are natural times for thinking about living the life you desire. Many of these times signal a transition which means some part of your life is ending and another part is beginning. Graduations are like that. It is a time of opportunity.

Communication problems are probably the greatest barriers to happy and healthy relationships. Somewhere in the exchange of thoughts and information something goes wrong. Words come out one way and are meant another. What was said is not interpreted in the way it was intended. Some thoughts ...

Generally speaking, the phrase mental well-being describes how well a person can cope with his or her everyday life. Caring for your mental well-being is possibly the most important thing you can do. A positive mental well-being can make you feel safer in your own body and help you to make longer-lasting relationships. On the other hand, a poor mental well-being can make you feel isolated and alone. You can feel lost in your own little world where nothing feels quite right. T

WANT A GREAT LOVE RELATIONSHIP? FORGIVE. People often will ask me how to create a lasting, loving relationship. They want to know how to find one or how to keep one. Maybe they have loved and lost, maybe they have loved and left. Either way, people are looking to find a romance that makes them feel safe and secure.

rnFeeling down in the dumps now that the holidays are over? If you're hoping for something uplifting on these dreary days and cold nights, you're not alone. T.S. Eliot, in The Waste Land, said, "April is the cruelest month." But studies have found that for the majority of Americans, January is the most depressing month of the year. Have you experienced any of this yourself? Your eager anticipation for the holidays is over, replaced by the reality of a celebration that didn't

“When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened” Winston Churchill Stop worrying and start living. We give this advice to everybody we see tensed even though sometimes we don’t even know why he is worried. We know that worry does not help us in anyway but still we cannot help it. In this article I will answer to questions like why we cannot stop worrying, how worrying harm us and how can we control it?

Life can be hard, unfair, painful, and confusing. Sometimes it is overwhelming and we feel defeated. We may face situations that we do not think we can overcome and we just want to give up. We may lose faith and give up on ourselves, on others, and sometimes on life itself. Following are simple words of encouragement to remind you that you can and will make it through the problems you face if you do not quit. Today, you can choose to believe for the best in your life, receive God's strength, get back up, and be encouraged to never give up!!

Oprah is helping the distraught 50 year old Sarah Ferguson, Duchess of York (known as Fergie), get out of a very tough and embarrassing situation. Oprah has even featured Fergie in her own show called Finding Sarah Ferguson. You may or may not know that Fergie, after building a lucrative business selling her children's books, ended up in big trouble when she agreed to take 500,000 pounds or close to three quarters of a million dollars for arranging access to her ex-husband, Prince Andrew, The Duke of York. The whole thing was a media set-up.

Not all people believe this but the mental and emotional aspects of a person, when combined, can lead to better self improvement. Emotions can dominate our actions and reactions, even though we don't want it to happen at times. Society often see emotions as a sign of weakness, so people are used to hiding them and focusing on the rational aspects of life more. It doesn't matter how strict and logical you might be, you will always feel in one way or another that someone or som

What does it mean to be mature? According to Merriam-Webster, mature is defined as having completed natural growth and development. That is, being fully grown, complete, ready. I do not believe that we arrive at a state of complete emotional maturity with no further need for growth and development. Rather, emotional maturity is a life-long process. We continually grow in our experience of love, acceptance, stability, adaption, and so forth.

When we hear the words “Soul Mate,” most people conjure up visions of that special someone specifically molded and made for them and only them. Someone who understands us as no other person can. And, like synchronized swimmers, “Soul Mates” are in tune and in rhythm with one another, navigating ...

Just before Halloween, Great healthy Pumpkin Stews: 1. with chicken, 2. Vegetarianr Two great healthy pumpkin stews, One with chicken, Second with chickpeas for vegetarian. Very healthy, very tasty and very easy to cook. Prepare for the great pumpkin taste. Pumpkin Chicken Stew The Ingredients: 2 chopped onions 2 tablespoons of olive oil 2 ¼ cups of water 4 potatoes cut into halves 2.2 pounds (1 kilo) of peeled diced pumpkin 1 tablespoon of sweet paprika 2 tablespoons of tomato paste 3-4 pieces of chicken (for those in diet you can remove the skin) 1 teaspoon of saltr

When people first get married they usually expect their love and commitment to last for a lifetime. Unfortunately, for at least half of all couples it doesn’t. What happens? Soon after marriage couples discover that the bliss of falling in love quickly fades. They no longer see each other ...

Everyone has ways that the next person doesn't like. We all have an angel and devil on our shoulder at times, but we have to figure out how to ignore the devil. Sometimes we go with the devil instead of the angel because we are not in a good mood, we don't think, and vice versa. I will begin to tell you three things to help you become a better person. These three things are a great start at living a better life. Religion, Supporting others, and letting go of anger are the big

Evaluating your personal core values is an important part of any personal growth plan. It is a key factor in cultivating a positive attitude . rnPart of any good personal development plan should include an evaluation of your personal values. Values are: A principle, standard, or quality considered worthwhile or desirable. What do you hold as important in your life? I do not mean material things or even money. If you could just forget all that stuff for a bit and try to focus

‘You don’t have to play sport to be an Australian, but you do have to have a sense of humour” says author Pete Crofts in his book How to use Humour in Business and Life. As an Australian I know they have many “winning ways” and I believe this is strongly linked to their good humoured view of the world. Is there a formula they and others use to aid their success ? Four of the so called “formulas for good humour” include exaggeration, understatement, saying the opposite, and unexpected punch lines.

Everyone always talks about living a fulfilling life or achieving one at minimum. The term fulfilling can be difficult because to one person with small children that might be fulfilling, while another person may not feel fulfilled until they have a million in the bank. Different things are important to different people so it is difficult to place a blanket statement on what fulfills everyone, in fact it is impossible. Instead the focus of finding fulfillment must be guiding o

Time has been called, "The 4th Dimension" by some thinkers, but, at minimum, it seems to shrink or expand, not obeying any kind of "Natural Law." Individually, few of us feel like we have enough of it to do all we want to do, let alone making space and time for ourselves.

“Understanding how context moves us and an over dependency on content sucks as a means to being Mindful”rn By Kenneth Silvestri, May, 2013 (Excerpted from my forthcoming book Living Systemically: How To Make Your Life Better)rn“The major problems in the world are the result of the difference between how nature works and the way people think it works” rn― Gregory Bateson For many years I have been looking at the world in a systemic manner, how we and our environment

Most people think that just by repeating some affirmations or telling themselves how they want things to be that they are being positive thinkers. Well, that may be true to an extent. But then they wonder why they aren't getting the results they want. Now this can get really complicated very quickly since there are so many variables to consider when trying to pinpoint why exactly positive thinking hasn't done much for you. Here's the catch - positive thinking isn't doing squa

Five Joyous Habits Human beings are moral animals. According to Dr Martin Seligman we each exhibit six virtues common across cultures and traditions. They are wisdom and knowledge, courage, love and humanity, justice, temperance, spirituality and transcendence. These virtues encapsulate the notion of good character. The way in which we each achieve the virtues is dependent on our individual strengths of character. Using our strengths produces good consequences and positive emotion, not only in yourself but in those around you who witness the display of a strength.

“A List of Happiness” A list of happiness is things that would be listed of how thankful that you are about something or a list of things that make you happy. We take for granted sometimes the simple things in life such as life, health, and strength that allows us to function. We even forget about time, technology, and the mind that allows us to choose. I would encourage everyone to create their happy thoughts as an element of encouragement and being reminded about the benefits of creation.

A million years ago or so when I was in college studying social work, I learned a really important lesson. It was that the minds of people are supposed to progress and become more enlightened as we evolve on our personal journey. I learned at this time that there are four questions that are supposed to be asked and eventually answered. They are: • What am I? • What am I really? • Who am I? • Who am I really?r

In this Article, I want to talk about the significance of labeling what we experience on a moment-to-moment basis. In thinking about this, I called to mind the statement: "The Map is Not the Territory." This statement comes from General Semantics, which Alfred Korzybski created in, I believe, around the mid-'90's. The basis of Korzybski's approach to understanding human behavior is that we are enslaved by our language; as I recall, he was a mathematician.

There are many stress management techniques and ways to manage stress. Before we get into that let's quickly discuss some causes of stress before we learn these stress management techniques Most of these are those little four letter words like: work, kids, (Though they are also very much a blessing, I realize how stressful raising them can sometimes be!) Debt, Cash and it's four letter counterpart LACK. getting sick or being in pain are also causes of stress. Loss can cover a

Positive Self-talk and Affirmations are pretty much the same thing with the very subtle difference that affirmations are more often verbal or written while Self-talk is more often played out in our heads. rnI got to know about the idea of Self-talk quite recently through a book by Theodore Bryant called “Self-Discipline in 10 Days”. It is one of those ideas that if I had read it out of context or didn’t read long enough about its underlying psychological implications, I

I think it is safe to say that there is not one person on this planet that would choose to be born into an abusive situation, whether it is any of physical, mental, emotional, spiritual or sexual abuse. As human beings, we are programmed to not like pain or suffering, however, at the hands of people who do not understand how their actions affect the lives of others, we have suffered.r

A recent study conducted by the American Psychological Association found that 75 percent of adults have experienced moderate to high levels of stress in the previous month. Almost half of the group reported that their stress had increased in the previous year. Unfortunately, only half of the participants said they were doing enough to manage their stress. Does that sound like you? It is acknowledged that the high unemployment rate has caused difficulties for many individuals and families. It certainly has created more stress for individuals, marriages, businesses, and schools.

One of the greatest challenges in loving others is to forgive them when they have wronged us and caused us pain. Every time we are wronged, we have to choose how we are going to deal with the hurt. Ultimately, we have to decide if we will forgive the person or persons who have wronged us, or if we will hold on to the hurt. If we hold on to the hurt, it will keep us from loving them. It will keep us angry and upset. We will not be open the release the hurt. Instead, it will continue to fester and grow. Unresolved hurts that are not forgiven continue to cause pain.

Awhile ago, I attended a beautiful wedding. A young Jewish couple came together in joy and the room was filled with happiness. Outside of the banquet room I noticed a group of older women sitting near the door collecting charity. They all looked very pure and plain at the same time, young seniors and older seniors, nothing fancy about them. Their hips were full. They were wearing comfortable walking shoes and somewhat frumpy looking clothing. There wore either wigs or kerchiefs.

Your absence of self-esteem probably comes from the attitudes of other people towards you. Your parents, brothers and sisters, etc. are all contributors of how your self-esteem is formed during your early years. If you come from a loving and caring family, have lots of friends and you did well at school your self-esteem will most likely be at a great level. On the other hand if you have only encountered negativity throughout your formative years your self-worth is very likely

Who's in charge? You or your beliefs? This is a question that has intrigued me and many other self development buffs for many years. If you listen to most people explaining their life situations, one must take the stance that it is the beliefs that are in charge. I have to do this or I can't do that...

Are regrets, bad memories, or losses keeping you from enjoying each new day? Is the past keeping you from moving into the future with hope and anticipation? I recently heard a man say that it was not until he made peace with his past that he truly began to live. It changed his life so ...

Most of us live in a perpetual state of doing, doing, doing: creating lists, striving, working hard, reaching for goals, running on empty. Cultivating the capacity for stillness in the midst of your busy day can yield enormous benefits. The ability to be still… can nourish and sustain the mind and body in ways that might seem hard to fathom. These moments are like micro-vacations, providing relief from the stress of our every day lives. They can allow us to reconnect with a

When I was a younger person, anger and anxiety were my "best friends". I never went anywhere without them. I did not like how they felt but I also did not like the feeling of being without them because they had become so familiar. It was almost like a void if they weren't present. My nervous sytem is very sensitive, so it was constantly in a state of overdrive. I lost my temper easily and could not function very well in a situation that required focus.

Psalm 37:5-6 Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and He will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. It's been a rough few days! My bully was back. I knew that a permanent change was probably too much to ask for. I mean, when he admits to having these behaviors for thirty years, he's probably not going to change them in three weeks. I knew that but....hope springs ete al.

I have told you about the bully in my life. I was amazed (although I don't know why I should have been) after I spent extra time in prayer that morning asking God to help me with this man, to find, when I arrived at work, him verbally pummeling a co-worker for something I had done. As I climbed the stairs to our offices, I could hear him ranting (OK, ranting might be a little excessive, but he was not happy) at her about what I had done with my committee and what he could do about it.

Compliment yourselves, believe in yourselves, and give yourselves credit. You are wonderful people; each and every one of you has many talents. You have achieved much in your lives. You are dear people. All you have to do is acknowledge it, believe in it and cultivate it. I once heard a dear person say – “The perfect person for being myself – is me”. And so, the most perfect person for being you - is you”. It is a wonderful sentence.

Understanding How Negative Thoughts Affect You If you are like most people, you probably do not realize how negative thoughts affect you. Since thoughts create feelings and feelings create thoughts, negative thoughts affect you in negative ways. Your negative thoughts do affect you. Negative emotions and thoughts have often been called powerful, and there is an excellent reason for this. Negative emotions are especially dangerous since they have been causally linked to numer

Courtesy ~ gracious, polite, or considerate remark or act; showing respect; polished manners Please, Thank You, Excuse Me... In this day, sad to say, courtesy isn't always "common". The fact that the term even exists indicates that at some point in time there must have been such a thing as "Common Courtesy". In fact, for research purposes I have been watching reruns of Father Knows Best and Andy Griffith, and you know what I've found? That as little as 50 some years ago court

Often we underestimate the effect of stress on our lives. Stress affects us on a spiritual, mental, emotional and physical level. It creates dis-ease in our bodies. When you are on overload, preoccupied with responsibilities and completely overwhelmed, it’s common to turn to fast acting solutions. After all we do live in a ‘quick-fix’ society. So what do you do? Do you over-indulge in comfort foods, drink in excess to escape, go shopping on credit, use illicit drugs or

When I was playing rugby as a youth and later when I started coaching various youth age group players I observed that the fastest, strongest and the most skilled player usually achieved the most in the game. When I became a professional rugby player and then after retirement I started coaching elite academy players I began to notice that these factors did not seem to matter as much anymore since everybody was fast, strong and skilled. Now this got to me wondering. But as time

What on earth has redundancy got to do with pyjamas? And more importantly, how can the notion serve your business operation ? Well, let me explain. With the advent of the industrial revolution came radical change which continues today. Business’s are restructuring, and with that, the job you had 3 weeks ago…is gone ! Any of you who have been through that process will know of the shock and the isolation. Any of you who have had to orchestrate it will know how difficult it is for everybody on staff.

A lot of studies have showed the health issues related to the extra burden and the work load that the students are getting. From some of the recent studies and the research materials we have seen that the people have claimed that the assignments and the homework are putting a lot of stress for the students and this is getting their health effected a lot. By the time the students are being pushed to the schools and the teachers are the one that deal with the students assigning

rnJust when we feel like things are looking up, we turn on the news or check our email and we hear another bout of bad news. Between a suffering economy and killer viruses, it's easy to sink into negativity and self pity. But that's no way to live. And when you are feeling negative, you are in no position to find real solutions to your challenges. Here are essential tips for staying positive when the going get tough. 1. Take care of yourself. I know you just want to skim over

When you look up the word accept, you get many definitions because it can be used in various ways, which we all know. I recently met a very intelligent, inspiring, and motivated individual. I enjoyed meeting with her because she is such an amazing entrepreneur that she caught my attention. Even though we had much in common when it comes to being an entrepreneur, there was one thing we did not agree on. The word “accept.” We both interpreted “accept” in Identity’s tagline, Ac

Once upon a time there was a young man who was well known and very much respected throughout his community, as he was active in civic affairs and had done many good deeds. He went to church regularly and lived a good clean life. One night, at the early age of 42, he was stricken with a fatal heart attack and within minutes he passed into eternity. The town folk were shocked at the sudden death, and they all agreed that he had been such a good man – he surely would be missed

Hank Rearden from Atlas Shrugged, reflecting on the steps he took over the years to invent a new metal alloy: “After a while, he realized that he was thinking of his past, as if certain days of it were spread before him, demanding to be seen again. He did not want to look at them; he despised memories as a pointless indulgence. But then he understood that he thought of them tonight in honor of that piece of metal in his pocket. Then he permitted himself to look. He saw the

You have probably heard the expression, “Use it or lose it.” If you ever began an exercise program, played a musical instrument, or participated in a sport, you know just how true it can be. Muscles atrophy without continual use and conditioning. Skill and technique diminish without practice. ...

“Ironically, after I have spent a year practicing dying, the quality most noticeably enhanced is a new joy in life.” Stephen Levine Although our society is obsessed with a wide-ranging struggle against mortality, I have spent 17 years assisting both “terminally ill” children and adults to come to peace with the fact that they are dying. I am continually impressed with the radical life changes that some people make when faced with death. Some even report discovering their own “deathless nature” as they begin to appreciate each valued moment.

In general, most of us are very careless about the words we use, or consider how the words we use could be affecting our life experiences, let alone tale responsibility for them. Currently, only a relative few individuals would give credence to the possibility that the words that we use, and those used by others in our hearing, can have an affect on us psychologically as well as physically. It is believed--we have been conditioned to believe--that words are, "just words."

Byron Katie, a spiritual teacher of the wisest kind, has given us the gift of seeing how arguing with reality only exhausts and stresses us. And that when we give up our story, we can find the freedom and peace we long for. Here is what I have learned from 15 years in the personal development industry: Your attachment to your story is stronger than you think. Your attachment to your story is what keeps you in that place of “everything is fine”. Your attachment to your story

There is overwhelming social pressure to identify who we are to others with labels, and to put labels on other people. For example, it is hard, when we meet others socially, to keep from asking that person what they do for a living, as well as tell them what we do to earn a living. Suggestions on how to overcome doing this in a social situation have been around for a long time now.

The Influence of Positive Thinking When a person is full of positive thoughts, life is just simply better for them. They seem happy, content and seem to attract the attention of a lot of people. You must have come across people like this in your life some day or the other. When everyone else is crumbling, they will instead just brush things off and move on with their life in full vigor. What is the secret to the happiness of people like them? The answer lies in positive think

The roles of perceptions in our life are not only scientific but also spiritual. On one level, as I speak in my workshops, perceptions are like our inner lenses and what we see outside is a reflection of what is inside. SO, if you see and experience issues in your life, there is an issue inside you which needs to be resolved, this could be your thoughts and beliefs. So if I carry a belief that the world is a tough place to live, my lens will show me toughness. One way of work

We’re all advised to avoid sarcasm in our personal communications. But it turns out that sarcastic exchanges can enhance and boost your creativity. Sarcasm is frequently used as a way to hurt, demean, or belittle others. It also, too often, serves as a veil for hostility, when direct confrontation would actually get to the heart of the matter. In addition to this, sarcasm is frequently used as a tool to bully the naive and innocent. Knowing all of this, your takeaway might be that sarcasm is a terrible form of communicating and should be avoided at all costs. Hold that thought.

Revealing The Art of Positive Thinking. To start off, it is best to define and identify what positive thinking is all about. Generally, it includes simply just what this term implies: having positive thinking towards things and people. When you start to think positively, you give off that favorable aura and you anticipate good health, success, love and happiness in each difficulty or inconvenience that life may bombard you with. By thinking that you would have better and opti

First, it has two distinct meanings: * To give up resentment or anger * To pardon an offense; to stop seeking punishment or recompense Here, I am going to focus on the first meaning, which is broad enough to include situations where you have not let someone off the hook morally or legally, but you still want to come to peace about whatever happened. Finding forgiveness can walk hand in hand with pursuing justice.

What makes some men more successful than others is that those who've achieved extraordinary results in their lives have done so because they had an immutable belief in themselves. They knew that if they are to make their dreams a reality and accomplish their goals, they have to believe that they are capable of doing so. This level of personal belief, confidence, an self-esteem comes from the deepest part of our inner core. It is this internal source that powers our abilities,

Love must be learned, and learned again; there is no end to it. ~Katherine Anne Porte n When people say "I love you," what do they mean? Perhaps they are referring to their strong emotions, or to a physical love that is passionate and lustful. How often is it a deeper love-a love that is ...

One thing I absolutely love about a new year, or a new day for that matter, is that it gives us a fresh start to set new goals and implement new plans to pursue and achieve. I have recently set some new goals that have been keeping me very busy, motivated, and excited. One of my many goals began about three weeks ago. I cut desserts out of my diet. It started with a chocolate fast. I was literally consuming at least one bar or 5 pieces of dark chocolate every day, and that is not including cookies, icecream and other desserts I love.

Despite a few false alarms, including a recent snow incident, spring has finally sprung. And therein is the illusion. I am not implying that it could snow again (although stranger things have happened). Rather, I am noting that spring starts springing way before most of us notice.r

A positive frame of mind is vital for several reasons. Confident positive thought patterns are normally shown to raise overall performance in productivity and quality. We very often will think much more creatively and function much better anytime we're feeling positive and well. If you are on top form, your esteem levels will go through the roof and this can only help you in your work and personal life. If you possibly could sustain yourself using regular challenges and also

COMPLEMENTARY VALUES Darkness & light are not two different things but two complementary values of same property. Existence of one ensures the absence of other. Absence of light is called darkness. When we say ‘there is light’, it automatically means ‘it is not dark’ and similarly when we say ‘it is dark’ it implies ‘light is absent’ rnThe positive value (light) helps us to do what ever we are doing (moral/immoral, legal/illegal, right/wrong) with ease. Its ne

______THE SCIENCE BEHIND SHOELACE TYING Almost always, you put on either your right shoe initially or your left shoe. Usually, you tie your shoes by either passing the right-hand lace around back of the left-hand lace, or vice versa. Tomorrow morning decide which shoe you put on first and how you lace up your shoes. Now, by putting on the other shoe earlier and tying your shoelaces in a contrary way, consciously resolve that for the next 21 days you are going to structure a n

How do you perceive life? By Pierre Ah-Fat, MBA, Transformation Coach The story of the two frogs Two frogs fell in a small well. They both started asking themselves what they should now do. One said: ‘Let us try to climb and get out of this well. We shall then be free to see the world.’ The other one responded: ‘What world do you want to discover? Can’t you see the sky from this well? I am fully satisfied with what I can see from where I am.’ In fact both frogs could in fac

In this article I want to ruminate around the power of our thoughts, as well as the words we use, to create our reality, which is what the Law of Attraction is about. It doesn't matter it we believe in it, or not, we are all living the Law of Attraction.

Let’s talk about your mental health. Note your initial reaction to that suggestion. What do you expect when someone wants to talk about your mental health? In our society, people often expect to hear some kind of criticism. The little man or woman inside may be accusing me of thinking you are crazy. Pay attention—I want to talk about your mental health—your mental and emotional assets. I believe that discussions about anything “mental” in our society should begin wi

There is no doubt that staying at home and socially distancing, though critically important at the moment, can take its toll. Experts advise that many people are suffering from increased anxiety, depression and other mental health problems at this time. Even if you’re stuck at home, this doesn’t mean that you can’t indulge in some important self-care. Here are 6 easy ways to lift your mood while you’re in isolation. 1. Get Creative You’re probably getting tired of t

Dreams are as centrally exposed and driven as you make them. Either they're important or they're not. It's your night of esoteric surrender. However, dreams do mean different things to different people, depending upon the relevance one places on the content. If you are not interested in investing the time to study, energy to accrue the relative symbolism and most emphatically, simply can’t relate to the messages offered, considering them to be a bunch of hodge-podge nonsense, then that’s precisely what they are.

Research by leading universities in the field of cognitive and behavioral science proves the existence of so called “automatic thoughts”, i.e. thoughts that come to mind involuntarily and effortlessly as an automatic response to certain stimuli. These are the thoughts that ultimately determine ...

Pain is a part of life. More so for some people than others of course. It seems that some people have the resources or strength or luck or skills to work through their pain and come out the other side unscathed, almost as if they hardly felt a thing. We comfort ourselves with the thought that such people are thick skinned or stupid or less sensitive than we who feel every slight, every sting to our wounded pride, every curse, every slur, every failure more deeply. For we secr

“Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day”. “Think positive and everything will be fine” This is the most given and the best advice ever told to us. Do you really believe that it works? Why do people tell us to think positively? What difference does it make to our life or our problems? Just hang on there and i will answer your questions. Positive thinking is not a hypothetical concept but it is a proven science. Study has shown that positive attitude impacts all the aspects of your life. The logic is simple. Thought comes before action.r

You've heard it a hundred times if you've heard it once, "just think positive". What does that mean? How can you think positive when there are so many negative things happening. I'll tell you what I think. Thinking positive is not just a thought process, it is a commitment to a different way of life, it is a process in which the way you think is the way you live. Think about your life, is it what you "thought" it would be? The truth is, it is exactly what you thought it would

Perhaps one of the strongest motivations for the development of the recent branch of psychology known as Positive Psychology, is the desire to move away from viewing the purpose of care as the treatment of mental illness. Professionals see things that are wrong with patients and they go to work to try and correct or fix the problems.

When it comes to your mental health, you need to make sure that you are everything right because stable mental health is the only guarantee to live a happy life. You’ll hear people telling you all kinds of things to improve your mental health, but more often than not, it is the small things that can make a huge difference. It means that you just need to develop an understanding and tell yourself that your mental health is important, and you need to put yourself first if you

Do you suffer from a lack of conversation confidence? When you make conversation with other people, is your mind constantly saying a lot of very harsh things to you about your conversation ability? Does your mind criticize every thing you say? Do you put yourself down for being shy or awkward? If you really want to improve your shyness and overcome your difficulty in making conversation with other people, the first step is that you have to start noticing exactly what you are

I’ve been talking about ways to Hardwire Your Happiness on the blog lately. So I thought it would be great to give you a sense of how it feels to take in the good. If you are someone who usually focuses on the negative experiences in the world you can turn that around over time by Taking in the Good. I’ll suggest some prompts here that you can use in your everyday life to start changing the negativity bias in our lives into Teflon for the positive. Take my prompt and go through the first three steps outlined below on your own. STEP 1. Have a positive experience

Imagine if each day you woke up and found $100 dollars in your bank account; and there was nothing you had to do to earn that money. Every day, without fail, it simply showed up. Imagine that you could spend it on anything you wish. What would you spend it on? Your Sacred Feminine Power of Creation is much the same. Each and every day you are gifted with the grace of Power. You never have to prove you are worth it, you never have to get anyone's approval to receive it and yo

Many of my students and clients admit that they are tired of working on themselves, because “self-improvement” causes them to feel like they should continuously be aspiring to be better, rather than affording opportunities to rest in who and where they are. I couldn’t agree more. Learning how to accept yourself as a work in progress, to cultivate compassion in place of criticism, and nurturing and nourishing instead of neglecting yourself, is what I consider living your life as “a path of enlightenment.”

Everyone faces difficulties in life such as loss of job, loss of family member, ill-health, financial crisis etc.; we too would have faced many. But we may not have faced them with a positive thinking, as we usually get trapped into negative thoughts, the moment we come across any difficult situation. Think about it! - Have we ever got any solution to our problems through negative thoughts? No. Instead it may have further deteriorated the already-bad situation, isn’t it?rnF

Maybe you have considered meditating as a way to decrease stress, anxiety, depressive disorders, concern, and other dis-ease within your body? Stress and feeling changes play a substantial role within the types of sickness that your entire body encounters. Probably the most beneficial ways to relieve tension is actually deep breathing. There are many methods meditation can certainly help in your passage towards overall health. Meditation can be as simple because silently near

Have you ever tucked a hotel towel in your suitcase? Tut, tut! It’s not an uncommon act. Regularly, we hear reports of millions of dollars worth of company property stolen by employees. Little violations happen very day like disappearing packages of paper, boxes of paper clips, file folders, and the occasional stapler and hole punch. Then there are the major breaches of public trust. Sherron Watkins was applauded on the cover of Time for whistle-blowing Enron’s big scam.

“Have you Decided to Be Happy?” Happiness is a state of the mind. Therefore one must decide to be happy. It is an emotion that can be controlled. However, the focus should not be limited to if one obtains tangible things. For example, I will be happy if I get a house, a car, or a higher paying job. When an individual base their happiness on the “if contingency,” they are limiting their emotion.

"The first thing to do, when you find yourself in a hole, is to stop digging," quipped one of our most beloved figures from the past, Will Rogers. Our current nearest, less humorous, equivalent is to, "Think outside of the box." Just as people have a hard time understanding how they can, "think outside of the box," (because they don't understand that their Belief Systems are, "the box"), when in a hole, they can't figure out how to "stop digging," (because it is their habitual ways of functioning in the world, based on various Beliefs, that causes them to, "keep digging.").

Have you ever heard the saying “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of God, which is why we call it the present?” Let’s give credit where it is due. That quote belongs to Bill Keane, the creator of the old cartoo Family Circus. Mother Teresa had a very similar one. She said, “Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.”

I have spent weeks creating my site and thinking of things to write. So many ideas, but which to do first? Then I had a revelation... I was sitting down after dinner to watch the news when this lady from Queensland came on. She is the mother of four children, and she was having some problems with her youngest daughter's behaviour and attitude. She came up with an idea to record some positive comments, and combine them with some pleasant music onto a CD to play to her daughter

Overcoming adversity and creating a happy life sometimes requires great work on our parts. Sometimes to live a life worth living and to experience more positive emotions and to have a sense of mental wellness we have to climb mountains in terms of efforts to feel good. But thankfully, for most ...

What does it mean to be in the moment? How can you learn to be truly present rather than simply getting through another day on automatic pilot? The truth is today is not just another day. It is the only day that you can count on. There are no guarantees about tomorrow or the day after. We, as humans, plan and the universe laughs. The moment you are in is the gift and your best response is to be open to whatever “is” today. The rest is in the past or in your wishes and fan

Integrating positive self affirmations for a better you, is helpful in improving your life. By making affirmations, whether negative or favorable, you set up your emotional state. This will determine how you feel for the remainder of the day, or when faced with certain situations. The best affirmations are the positive ones which you make to yourself. What this means is that you develop a habit of constantly talking to yourself in a practical way which helps to keep you awake

Or rather, why don’t we know we are Magicians, Shamans, Sages, Wizards and Mystics? I believe that we were all born with magic inside of us: a passion, desire and ability to express something that is uniquely our own. No one ever was or ever will be exactly like you. You are unique and you have something extraordinary inside of you waiting to be born and shared with the world. "The universe is holding its breath, waiting for you to take your place" ----- Jean Houston

Small Changes Ripple Outward Happiness is a choice. It can be a difficult decision to make with all the negativity in the world. It doesn’t have to feel like such a daunting option when focusing on small changes. Small changes create big leaps forward. Over time a greater sense of happiness is enlivened. If you want to optimize your brain health and create greater happiness here are some simple ideas. You don't have to do them all to achieve results. Focus on just a few and

Habits, like clothing, are external to us and a product of our choices. We need to choose them carefully, and change them if necessary; to insure that they accurately reflect who we really are, the things that matter most, and the impressions we want to be remembered by.rnPeople often believe that their habits represent their identity, when habits are nothing more than a series of learned behaviors based on our personal choices. They include habits of mind, habits of word, an

Water does not worry about how it will take the shape of the glass into which it is being poured! Yet as humans we can be caught up in worry and anxiety over what might happen. In order to survive and thrive we need to be in what I call inspired action. To achieve that space we need to have factored in some down time that allows for reflection and relaxation. When we consistently do that, the mind can much more readily summon forth inspired ideas and thoughts, that when acted on bring great results.

When I was little I was very busy--as I imagine most little girls are. At six years of age I had my toys, my fire station with a real bell, my fire trucks and other cars, my paper dolls, my coloring books and large box of Crayola assorted crayons, my picture books and stuffed animals. One of ...

Mr. X’s life is filled with an incessant round of activities. He is constantly on the move. He is driven and he pushes the boundaries. He soars high in his career. He is sure he has it all - the trappings of wealth and success, accolades and a great lifestyle. What more could he possibly ask for? And yet, strangely enough, Mr. X still feels a lingering sense of dissatisfaction. Although his life is such a phenomenal success story, he can’t understand why he doesn’t feel

How do you typically embrace the world? Are you constantly waiting for the storm to arrive, or do you look forward to a day of uncertainty? Do you typically see the good in most situations, or are you constantly looking over your shoulder? nnI am a firm believer that the lens through which you see the world can color all your experiences in life. I was lucky enough to have been brought up in a loving and enriching home, where we expected the best and survived the worst. My mo

She was crying and complaining, “Woe is me.” Yes, that is me whining some days and perhaps you, too. Many of us think that if we didn’t have hardship, we would be truly happy. Not so. Your life is meant to be rewarding, happy, meaningful and challenging. A meaningful life isn’t just handed to you all at once. It comes as you develop resilience. Resilience refers to your ability to cope with, adapt to and rise above hardship and crisis.

The statement, "We only use approximately ten percent of our abilities" is familiar to many of us who came of age, or lived through, the '60s. This idea was attributed to William James. William James, the older brother of Henry James, the writer, is considered, by some, to be the father of American Philosophy. Other than that, "tip of the hat," he has been, for all practical purposes, ignored. My personal opinion is that this is because his ideas go counter to what we are supposed to believe about ourselves and our abilities.

The idea of facing a challenge and feeling as though you are given a second chance develops because of your perspective. Too often, we look for exte al situations to be the reason we have a second chance, but what happens within your brain creates the feeling as though you can deal with this challenge again from a better part of you. If that is true; you have the power to create second chances independent of any exte al change. For instance, relating to some people you love c

Ever since Title IX guaranteed equal funding for girls' sports programs 40 years ago, we've seen the results in school, the workplace and women's self-confidence. Studies have shown that girls who play sports in high school are more likely to do better in science classes, complete college, avoid substance abuse and join the workforce. And the more time they spend participating in team sports, the higher their self-esteem. Naturally, there's also an effect on the playing field

When we think of diamonds, the image that most often comes to mind is that of the valuable crystal clear, sparkling gem mounted in a piece of fine jewelry. They are treasured for their brilliance and, as most of us know, because they are virtually indestructible. It is the hardest substance on earth. Owning diamonds is a symbol of wealth and abundance. Even a small quantity of diamonds, a mere pocketful let’s say, might make most of us feel rich. If we saw a diamond lying o

Recently, I watched a short video presentation by Dan Dennett, a modern Western Philosopher, who considers himself a Philosopher of Consciousness. He indicated that other modern Philosophers look down on him with scorn, because they believe there is no such thing as, "human consciousness." In his presentation he quoted an idea of another modern Philosopher, to the effect that, "All philosophy is based on rational arguments." Professor Dennett then went on to explain that, in actuality, what people consider to be their consciousness is a, "bag of tricks."

The ability to live and show itself the dreams depends heavily how we can visualize our futures. What happens in the event that some people don’t have the imaginative abilities other people do, nevertheless? Will that mean we can never provide the expectations alive? For example, some people tend to be genetically much more imaginative and visionary than others. Does which means that we're doomed in order to being much less profitable? Of course the answer is no. Even thoug

Is your life clearly out of control with raising kids, running around for activities, squabbles, discipline and the chaos? The stress of mortgages, bills, keeping up your home, and your relationship not to mention your work outside your home!rnAre you instantly finding yourself on over load every day? rn You’re up to your neck at work and your boss certainly thinks you can do more. You think you need to have your children in more activates and your house is completely a mes

As winter descends we begin to feel the chill of shorter days and less sunlight. For many of us, less hours of light combined with colder temperatures results in us feel less light emotionally. For some of us, who actually have SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) gloom really sets in. This gloom ...

What is the secret to unhappiness? Some could find an infinite answer to this question. Feeling unfulfilled, weak, powerless. Feeling like a victim of fate. There's a thousand different ways to feel unhappy but, there's only a few reasons to feel unhappy. There are only a few dozen actual reasons we feel weak, powerless, and unfulfilled in life. Some of these reasons are caused by tragedy and other life changing events. Others are caused by physical and mental impairments. Ho

I consider myself to be a Philosopher of Consciousness; to my philosophical thinking, what is most basic is, "what is real." Our Reality, currently, is determined by what we in the Western World have bee Indoctrinated and Programmed to Believe it is.

Are you constantly thinking negative thoughts on a daily basis? If so then you need to address this problem as quickly as possible. We are constantly reminded of how negative thinking can prevent us from living the life we want, achieving what we want and being what we want. I was a victim of negative thinking for many years. It was without doubt my Achilles Heel. The biggest barrier that stood in my way to achieving all those rugby goals I dreamed of achieving ever since I w

Ever since the Secret made its movie debut back in 2006, there has been an onslaught of information and -- in my opinion -- misinformation about what the Law of Attraction is and isn’t and how we measure success. I suppose first and foremost it is a personal interpretation, yet many if not all of the law of attraction programs presently being promoted have its key focus on material success as the gold standard (pun intended) of what success really means.r

We are busy. We have careers. We have families. We have chores that need to be tended to and friends who want our support. We have bills to pay, meals to cook and children or pets to take care of. In the fast-paced rhythm of our daily lives, it is easy to overlook our own well-being, and in the midst of an extra long to-do list, who has time to think about Sacred Feminine Power? You do. And you must. Matthew A old, a 19th century British poet claimed, "If ever there comes a

As a Positive Psychologist I help women find a personal sense of well-being that frees each woman to live a life of meaning, purpose and joy. May I share with you a little of my jou ey? My original research with women happened as a result of my conce s around pain that so many women ...

Conscious discipline can be defined as an approach to address behavior that is multidisciplinary. It is different from behavioral approaches that target specific behaviors and presents a neurodevelopmental model of the brain which is an adaptation from the works of various people including Bruce Perry, Allan Schore, Daniel Siegel, Joseph LeDoux, Alexander Luria, Louis Cozolino and Paul MacLean. A disciplined brain state model shows us and enables us to understand better the s

“Smiling and Laughing is Good for the Soul” Did you not know that smiling and laughing at yourself is good? A smile is a facial expression that displays happiness. A smile with a buildup of emotion goes from silence to sound, which is expressed in laughter. Yes, a build of happiness that must be echoed by your distinctive sound in laughter. In the practice of smiling and laughing one is able to bring healing to their body. Smiling can even make you look more attractive, younger, and improve your stress level. Are you smiling now?

Do you have thoughts on positive thinking and its effect on your life? Or do you just live to get by, working and working and not giving your own mental and emotional health much thought? The truth is, your thoughts on positive thinking may be more significant to you and your life than you thought. Positive thinking is an essential part of human life. Studies have shown that people who are more optimistic live longer compared to those who indulge in negative thinking. Even th

We all have strengths and weakness. Our strengths are usually referred to in positive terms such as "smart," "strong" or "talented." Rarely do we view our weaknesses or deficits as potential clues to our strengths. Some common and negatively perceived characteristics can actually help us discover some very positive qualities and underlying strengths. Following is a list of 7 common negative labels and some other ways we might look at them:

I’m probably the only one that is going to tell you not to set this certain goal for 2012. Goals are great, goals are fantastic, and goals are certainly needed, but this goal has been going on within generations for generations. Enough is enough and we must take a different approach for our own sanity. So it’s the New Year, and I’m sure there is about 80% of you who want a “new you”. A more fit, stronger, happier, richer, perkier (many ways), or younger, “new you”. When will

"All great books contain boring portions, and all great lives have contained uninteresting stretches. [...] Kant is said never to have been more than ten miles from Koningsberg in all his life. Darwin, after going round the world, spent the whole of the rest of his life in his own house. Marx, after stirring up a few revolutions, decided to spend the remainder of his days in the British Museum." - Betrand Russell, The Conquest of Happiness This fragment from Russell's book is

What is hydrocephaly? Hydrocephaly or hydrocephalus - also known as ‘water on the brain’ is a brain disease that affects 1 in every 500 births, making it one of the most common developmental disabilities - more common tha Down syndrome or deafness. It was first described by Hippocrates, the ancient Greek physician. It wasn’t until the 20th century that effective treatments were developed for it, and there is still no known cure. So what is it? Our brains are suspended in a

Many of my readers write to me about the tensions of everyday life. Not only do people wonder how to relax, but people often ask, "How do I learn to better cope with what faces me? Can THE ENCHANTED SELF help with the overwhelming frenzy of everyday life? Can it help when I am really down or ...

"If I’d know I was going to live so long, I’d have taken better care of myself." James Blake Believe it or not, you are your most valuable asset. And the only asset that will be with you for the entire length of your life. No one else, no friend, family member or loved one can promise that. Just you. Let’s pretend for a moment that I gave you a car. But there’s one caveat. This car will be your only vehicle for the rest of your life. If this were true, I think you’d take ve

Here's a tip that I learned from my Grandma that works extremely well in the classroom. Growing up, when my grandmother would talk to my brother and I, she would finish sentences with the phase "Do you know what I mean?" or "Do you know what that is?" Constantly, confirming that my brother and I understood what she was saying. nn In truth, my brother and I, who were teenagers, found these verbal confirmations almost silly at time. I remember one time when she told us about he

I am remembering and have a desire to share with you, a beautiful story told to me by a young lady. It was the end of the World War II and her dad was returning home. He came from a very close network of Italian families that lived near each other in New Jersey. n He had a ride back from where ...

Many of us are our own worst critics. When we make a mistake, we often say harsh things to ourselves. If we feel we like we’ve blown it or stepped out of line, we can fire off bitter comments aimed at our self. “You jerk!” “You’re a loser!” “What’s wrong with you?” These verbal assaults can wear us down and make it difficult for us to enjoy our personal and professional lives. We can end up feeling depressed, anxious, or stressed out. Not a fun way to go thr

Stress is an undeniable part of our lives, so the more we understand what our individual stressors are, the more we can build a system to create control over them. At times, there will be stressors that we simply cannot control. Therefore, we need to create systems such as fitness, meditation and the power of acceptance, to make peace with those things that are beyond our power to change. It’s our response to a situation – more than the situation itself – that can make all t

If you've been following the personal development world, you might have come across a new product that's been launched recently. This product is called “Crack Your Egg” , and is made by Henk Schram. Henk is the creator of the previous “Revolutioniz” self improvement program. I'm on the mailing of many self help experts , and I notice that a number of them are emailing me about this product. Greg Frost of “Mind Secrets Exposed” promotes it. Dr. Robert Anthony of â€

Creative thinking is a skill we can learn and practice in the course of daily life and here is the best reason to try: simply "changing set" or shifting attention can mitigate stress. Taking every opportunity to experiment with a new approach or attitude in familiar, predictable or routine situations trains the brain and mind to be more creative and adaptive in the face of sudden change or the high-stress curves life can throw in our path. Because there is so much about life

Do you wish you had just a few skills to turn negative conversations you have with yourself and others into a solution-oriented problem solving direction, instead of a bitch session? The trick is in asking the right questions. Unconscious questions like "Why does this always happen to me?" often result in negative unconscious answers like "Because you're just not good enough." This kind of thinking can keep you in an endless cycle of chasing your own tail, often resulting in feelings of inadequacy.

Hope, the four lettered word that keeps us going. The intangible yet heartfelt assurance that fires up our bones and strengthens weak hearts. By it, the poor became not only rich but wealthy, in its absence the most courageous becomes chicken livered and the strengths of the mighty fails them. Hope, found in palaces and on the streets, accessible to all, utilised only by the wise. Tip toeing behind affliction, Hope is gentle and not forceful. The most needed commodity in our

Especially in the western world millions of people of average intelligence and education started with nothing and were able to create successful lives. In terms of success, background and education are not deciding factors. Your ability to continuously focus your mind on positive thoughts, ...

In life, it is inevitable to go through hardships. That is part of life that a person has to go through in order to continue living and to become stronger. Having said that, people tend to think negatively of life in general because of the hardships they encounter. Just like how inevitable it is to encounter these hardships, it has also become inevitable for some to have a negative view of life. For years I was crippled with a negative and defeatist attitude that it just beca

So much has been written and said about how to have a positive attitude. Taking it in the jugular just might be the best way to truly define, and perhaps even touch it. Positivity over other things is not relative. In the world today, especially for the youth, this needs to be stressed in order to grasp what is positive in its very nature. Your personal agenda is not always positive. The gratification of your ego or pride is not positive. In other words, just because it works

Life gives to each one of us in so many ways. For starters, there’s the bounty of the senses – including chocolate chip cookies, jasmine, sunsets, wind singing through pine trees, and just getting your back scratched. What does life give you? Consider the kindness of friends and family, made more tangible during a holiday season, but of course continuing throughout the year.

Hello, I am Dr. Grant Kruhly, Chiropractor, Nutritionist, Life Guide and Sensei of Japanese Sword and Meditation. I’d like to briefly explain the comprehensive system of Health and Wellness care I offer to my patients. With these highly advanced healing systems, I have been very successful ...

Have you ever woke up in the morning, staggered over to the bathroom mirror, looked up and thought, “Who are you?” Then just as quickly, you put yourself in the normal distracted state. Teeth must be brushed, hair combed, shower, clothes, and then off to the daily grind. This pattern continues throughout your day and on through the night until the next morning when you are caught off guard once again in your semi-conscious state by the person in the mirror. The question i

"Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek." -Barack Obama Wow…what a great quote from our president! He is one of many influential people that have used change to move mountains and make a difference in the world. To change allows the unthinkable to happen in your life. I find it to be one of the most positive and productive ways to promote self-growth. Just take a mome

Are you aware of the number of times every day that you either say “Yes” or “No,” to yourself? You are essentially saying one or the other with every thought you think, word you speak, decision you make or action you take. Or don’t. You’ll know which side of the scale your yeses and no’s are weighted on by how alive you feel. Or don’t. On Saying YES to You! Every “yes” you say to yourself increases your sense of aliveness. Your aliveness is the degree that

As an adult, you are probably leading a very busy lifestyle. You have kids to take care of, you have a research paper that needs to be finished, or you have a quota at work that you need to accomplish. And because you are so pre-occupied with a lot of things, you may not have enough time for playing games. Even though we are not little kids anymore, experiencing the simple joys of playing a game can be a really beneficial experience. It helps our brain retain its sharpness an

All good counselors and therapists learn early on, possibly the most valuable skill they can develop, is to meet their clients where they are. Active listening skills are necessary in order to effectively communicate with everybody, but none more so, than with teenagers.

Different people choose to live their lives in a number of different ways, but there comes a time when we all start to realize our mortality. It’s usually at that point where we take stock of our lives and look back at the things we have accomplished, as well as those that have slipped through the cracks and remain undone. It’s at this point that many people start to think about fulfilling some of those missed opportunities by creating a bucket list. While there are those

Behind every successful move there must be a string of positive thought patterns. An individual‘s ability to think positively whenever they are met with challenges is the main secret behind successful undertakings. Every motivational speaker will quite as much point out the benefits of believing in oneself before performing any task, not only this but a mental tendency of optimism is quite effective in attaining success in every facet of life. Positive self affirmation make

I don’t know why we all get so hung up on trying to hide or eradicate our flaws. We all have imperfections. Yet, we are often so intent on covering them up. Doing this is so self-eradicating. And it’s exhausting too. What about just letting yourself be, flaws and all? Not in a weak, “I’m no good” kind of way, but in a strong, self-compassionate, “This is me” orientationâloving yourself, accepting yourself as good enough, as you are, right now. So, here’s the challenge: For

Everyone faces difficulties in life such as loss of job, loss of family member, ill-health, financial crisis etc.; we too would have faced many. But we may not have faced them with a positive thinking, as we usually get trapped into negative thoughts, the moment we come across any difficult situation. Think about it! - Have we ever got any solution to our problems through negative thoughts? No. Instead it may have further deteriorated the already-bad situation, isn’t it? Fo

Instead of living in the moment, we live for the most part in our minds, cluttered with thoughts. These thoughts are in fact part of our memories from the past. These memories are either pleasant or unpleasant, depending upon whether we had a like or dislike towards them when they occured. For example, instead of enjoying the holiday you have been looking forward to, you spend most of your time thinking about your work whilst on holiday. You cannot fully relax and appreciate

Hypnosis training involves acquiring knowledge on how you can use your mind control techniques to convince another person or a group, e.g. to agree with you, in case of an argument. This can also be well be applied in advertising of the products whereby you will have to convince them to buy your products .But this could be argued as an old fashioned way of winning the trust of the others and intimidating. As with improvement in technology it influence can be termed as short t

My father called Mom and me, “The stupid females.” My grandma Effie, called Mom and me, “My darlings.” My husband calls me “Ma dear.” Some people think I am naïve and too nice. Others think I am delightful and kind. Some people think I am scattered and disorganized. Others think I am a creative genius. Yes, I have spent my fair share of time worrying about what people think of me. What’s the fear? The fear of: • being rejected or not accepted • having a poor reputation • feeing less than • being perceived as a failure or stupid • being unworthy

There is a popular quote that states ‘as a man thinketh so is he’ this is a very powerful statement that carries around a heavy meaning. Just to gauge it, any kind of success is first initiated in the mind as a thought. The continual contemplation and positive self affirmations toward that thought materializes in reality. Any individual enjoying success in anything will confide that the success they are enjoying started as a thought then it developed to become a spoken wo

Linda, a 42 year old attorney with two young boys, felt guilt and disappointment both on the job and at home. She never quite felt that she was where she needed to be at any given time. For all of her accomplishments, she felt like a failure as a lawyer and as a mother. She strove for perfection in all facets of her life, but now was finding that juggling motherhood and her professional life made this impossible. The standards that Linda set for herself were unattainable and

A great way to focus, even if you are tired is to get angry. This way you get your blood pressure higher, your lungs wider opened, your adrenaline pumped up etc. However, this isn't always a good decision as the angrier we get the faster we make our decisions and the worse they are, based entirely on emotions and very little on common sense. So, in what way we can be focused but relaxed and how to get rid of the stress in the best possible way so that we can be more successfu

We all have things that we would love to see or do before we die, yet we seldom ever make any sort of plan to actually accomplish any of those dreams. This is why you should really think about creating a bucket list, so that you have a clear, detailed list of those items that you can check off as you finish them. Imagine going grocery shopping without a list of the items that you need. You can pretty much guarantee that you will have forgotten at least one item when you start

Every one of us naturally wants to take steps toward positive thinking because it would take us toward more encouraging and optimistic experiences. Since thinking positively does not come naturally or easily to most of us, it takes focus to acquire them. However, the steps of affirmative thoughts are many, and not all steps to optimistic mindset are as effective and useful as others. So why do yo have to take more steps of feeling positively than you need to? I have made and

Individuals who are mentally and emotionally healthy tend to be the masters of their behavior. Being healthy in both aspects enables an individual to take on life and its challenges all while building healthy relationships with the people they interact with and also leading lives that are not only productive but are also fulfilling. Bad things happen to everyone, whether you are a good person or not. If an individual is equipped with mental and emotional health, they find it

So I said to myself, I want to create something with such paramount value that people love me, my wife and my company. Here it is: How many people in the world do you think are just 'content' in their lives? Most people, for lack of statistics, are NOT happy in their lives. They take pills for anxiety, depression, they overeat, they buy SELF HELP books and don't even open them because they are that far gone!!! Can you believe that? Better question, did I just describe you?

Self talk is the dialogue or 'inner chatter' that plays out in our mind. Whether it's positive self-talk or negative self-talk this is a behavior that's ever-present in all our lives. We all talk to ourselves constantly throughout the day. Everything that goes on our life is usually accompanied by our own 'running commentaries'. The problem is however, much of our self-talk is of a negative nature. It is often colored with regrets and disappointments about our past, and fears

We all crave to be seen, heard and acknowledged. Whether I say that to individuals, groups or large audiences, heads nod in the affirmative. When I first began working in a counseling agency, I was thrilled with the supervision. My manager smiled, nodded and listened as I worked out my problems through non-stop, extroverted talking. As I exited from his office, I would turn, thank him for his time and he would respond with a generous laugh and a big “You’re most welcome.” I left notes of appreciation on his desk and the occasional homemade muffin.

Ever wonder why people are the way they are or where they learned to be a certain way? We cannot discount the influence of upbringing, peers, environment and genetics. Although we have very limited or no control over some of the things that shape our children, we can do our part to make a positive difference. We teach them by the way we treat them and the way we treat others. We can lead them by our example and how we react and cope with people and situations. It is empowering and encouraging to know that children can learn love and happiness when it is manifested in our own lives.

Roberta tragically lost her father in a freak accident when she was eighteen years old. Her mother took the reins and controlled Roberta’s life by making her stay at home and work for the family business, rather than going off to college as planned. To escape her mother’s firm grip, Roberta married at the age of twenty and began her family. Five children later Roberta found herself depressed and lonely, although she loved her family. She neglected herself except on rare o

An important aspect of personal empowerment is having an ability to be emotionally present and aware of your internal emotional experience. So often we try to figure out what we need to do next with our brilliant intellect, we then miss the valuable information our emotions are telling us about an experience. I see my feelings/emotions as my ally. They round out my experience and when I also pay attention to my feelings, I am fully grounded and oriented in my world. Often my

Segregating the genders in schools is nothing new. We've been doing this for centuries from the primary grades on. In the United States, this policy is largely limited to private schools, however, there are a few public and charter schools that do have separate classrooms for males and females. In other countries, separating the genders is standard procedure. <img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-T6LzjLzNb0E/UJ6wjaNUesI/AAAAAAAARGs/XFDLsfPVZOo/s640/IMG_1182.JPG" width="480">

Past experiences do shape our world view. Things we learn, often as children, keep us safe and teach us how to get along in the world. They also help us to form our view of the world and our beliefs about ourselves, other people and the world in general - we call these core beliefs. These beliefs affect our behaviour, attitude to self and others, and our thoughts and feelings. As we continue through life, we have other experiences, some add to our learning and some reinforce

The holidays are some of the best times and opportunities we have to continue our family traditions. Many of us can recall how our families celebrated Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, or birthdays every year. There are some extra special traditions we may remember. Maybe every Christmas we got together with our grandparents or we went out of town to visit friends or family members. Maybe we participated in the local Thanksgiving parade every year or there was a certain dish we especially enjoyed that was prepared specifically for Thanksgiving day.